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aria Hansen still re-
members the night two
years ago when she
says she tried to kill her
sleeping husband.
"I had had enough of that buzz
saw, so I put a pillow over his
face and held it there," says
Maria, 41, of San Diego. "He
didn't even wake up. And, he
didn't stop snoring!"
Bob Hansen, 43, was pushed,
prodded and forced to a daybed
in another room the next night,
and he's been sleeping there ever
since.
"It has saved our marriage,"
says Maria, who has been wed
to Bob for 20 years. "The only
problem is, I can still hear him
snoring sometimes, down the
hall. It would be better if he'd
move into the back yard."
Maria and Bob are not the
only married folks to have this
kind of nightly arrangement —
a king-size number do.
When the San Diego Union-
Tribune recently asked to hear
from couples who don't sleep to-
gether, the editors were deluged
with phone calls, letters and e-
mail, along with one cassette
recording of what was either a
motorboat or a man snoring.
As you might have guessed,
snoring is the main reason for
separate accommodations, and
90 percent of the time it is the
man who is guilty. (Take heed
though, ladies, your significant
others say you are not totally in-
nocent.)
Thrashing and kicking and
temperature incompatibility (she
likes it hot, he likes it cold) tie for
the next-most-frequent reason.
Different schedules (he works
nights, she works days) also rat-
ed pretty high, as did different
interests (he likes to watch late-
night TV, she likes to read in qui-
et).
A handful of people said they
like to sleep with their dogs or
cats but their spouses don't. And
one woman said she could toler-
ate her husband's snoring and
flailing, but had a problem with
his talking and walking in his
sleep. She moved out of the mas-
ter bedroom the night he stood
up in bed and screamed bloody
murder (while still asleep).
One woman, Berna Danziger,
told of how she found compro-
mise.
"I'm always cold, and he's al-
ways warm. I bought a set of
flannel sheets, and he couldn't
stand them. I solved the problem
by cutting them in half and at-
taching them to a regular sheet,
with a seam down the middle.
Now he enjoys the cool, cotton
side while I am snug and warm
on the flannel."
Still, all but a few couples said
that having separate bedrooms
improved their relationships.
"What's so important about
being together when you're
asleep?" asked Rachel, 51. 'What
really hurts a relationship is be-
ing tired all the time."
About 20 percent said that
sleeping separately throws a
damper on their sex lives. But
many more said their sex lives
are better than they used to
be.
"There is an interesting line
in the film The Sheltering Sky,"
wrote Marlene. "Debra Winger
explains separate accommoda-
tions for herself and her husband
like this: 'Don't confuse sleep
with sex."'
"There is no love lost in our
arrangement," agreed Russ, 42,
another separate sleeper. 'When
my wife and I want to ren-
dezvous, we rendezvous. Its like
a date. And it sure feels better to
get a good night's sleep."
❑
Copley News Service
Therapies Target
Cause Of Pain
JACK WILLIAMS SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH NEWS
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You must be 18 or older.
I
f your posture stands up to
Anthony Carey's scrutiny,
chances are you're not in a
slump. Nor should you have
creaking joints, major muscle
imbalances or rebellious body
parts that can't seem to stay in
line.
Consider yourself an anatom-
ical rarity, if not an aberration,
who could moonlight as a mod-
el for physiology textbooks.
But given our inherent human
imperfections, as well as those
caused by trauma, most of us are
customized combinations of un-
der- and overused muscles.
One side's strength is the oth-
er side's weakness.
The symptoms: faulty align-
ment, constricted movement,
back pain, knee pain, foot pain
=
r-/