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July 25, 1916 - Image 2

Resource type:
The Wolverine, 1916-07-25

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..... _.

Orpheum Theatr1
The House of Famous Plays by Famous
Tues-Dorothy Gish wth OwenHomre
io B"SsonRocks the Boot." Trilangle
Comedy, "Bath Tub Perils." ev'g. s5c
Wed.,:26-Lillian Gish in "The Lilyand
the Rose." 'Triangle Comedy, "The
Great Vacuum Robbery." Evog. 50
Thurs.-Friday, 27-28-Peggy Hyland in
"Saints and sinners." Bray Cartoons
Shows at 3oo, 6:0. 8:eo, 9:30 ,
Tues. 25-Clara Kimball Young in "The
Feast of Life" (Ret.) and Mutt and
Jeff Cartoon.
Wed.,26- Frances Neluon ton"What
Happened at 22," and Mtt" and Jeff
Thar.,,07-Harold Lockwood and May
Allison in "The Comeback," and Drew
TheonlyOpen-AieTheatre inAnnArbor
Smoking permitted
Toes., 25-Nance Oeil is "Souls in
Bondage." featuringzNance O'Nieil,thw
Bernhardt of thescreen.
Wed., 26-"A Texas Steer," a selig com-
edy, laid in Texansand Washington,
Allotarcast featuring Tyrone Powers.
Thurs., 27-"Love' Toll," a remarkable,
Lubin produetion.

The official student newspaper fo
the University of Michigan summe
session. Published by the students o
Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday af
ternoons. Twenty-five issues.
Subscription rates-By carrier, sev
enty-five cents for the summer
mailed to any address for one dolla
Advertising rates-Furnished upon ap
plication to the business manager.
Subscriptions and ads taken at Quar
ry's and University Avenue Phar
OfficeHours: Managing editor, 2:0
to 3:00 daily; business manages
1:00 to 2:00 daily. Phone 960 o
Address, The Wolverine, Press Build
ing, Maynard St., Ann Arbor.
Verne 1B. Burnett-Mgaonsg Edito
Phone-2414 or 1283-M.
C. Verne Sellers-Business Manage,
Phone-960 or 1460
Tom C. Reid-Associate Editor
H. C. Garrison-Sports Editor
Marian Wilson-Women's Editor
Walter Atlas-News Editor
Bruce Swaney-News Editor
M. H. Cooley R. T. Mane
George W. Corwin Frank Martir
M. N. Elsenau Phil Pacl
R. F. Fitzpatrick Ward Petersor


roit, Ann Arbor and Jackson.
Eastern time, one hour faster
tad and Express Cnar- Sios.
to 7:10p. 0., 9:1 p. m.
LimitedCirs-8:4a. m, ad
re to 6:48 p. m.; to Lansing,
astbound-s 35 a. tn., 6:40a.,
every two bours to 7:05 p. M.,
5 p. M.o10:50p. m. To Ypsi.
B a. m. 'Saily except Sunday).
05 p. in., 0605 p. at., 11:45 p.
Westound-6:os ain. m,7:50 a.
ins hours to 7:50 p. in., 0:40

University School of Music
"A Gathering Place for Advanced Students"
Annual Summer Session
Regular FallTerm begins Mon., Oct. 2,1916
Por Catalogue and Information address
CHARLES A. SINK,Seorsetary
Ann Arbor, Mich.
rhe Ann Arbor Savings Bank
Sesurity - Sprvioe - Looation
.apital........ .S 300,000.00
surplus and Profit.... $ 175,000.00
tesources .........7.........5,7000.00,
Main Office, N. W. Corner Main
and Huron Sts.
Branch Office, 707 North Univ-
ersity Avenue.
haves, haircuts, massages and the
were scarce on Saturday morning
doe's barber shop on North Univer-
avenue. It wasn't lack of cus-
ers either. They were there and
Moe was there to take care of
n. The trouble was one of the ex-
. barbers left Friday night for De-
t. At least that's where he said
was going. He left in a hurry,
1gh, and he took every razor, hair
lh, clipper, strop and pair of shears
he could get his hands on. In.
he took about every movable
g that the shop contained-except
cash register. Mr. Moe's chief re-
is that he didn't get that too. It
heavy-and empty.
ey are back at work now at Moe's
the new razors and scissors are
and sharp. The worst of it is he
a good barber.

H. H. Gellert Grace Rose
Mary Gratiot Carl Rash
H. 14. Haag Jerome Zeigler
r s}ineee Staff
Wm. H, Hoga Robert M. Schiller
Richard Goldsmith llan Livingston
Issue Editor- sri J, Rash
In England during the Augustan age
there was a certain Joseph Addison
who called himself the Spectator, and
went around noticing and publishing
the little correctable faults In the folk
of his time.
A similar character came into The
Wolverine office recently and reported
some facts which are too close under,
the students' noses to be seen, perhaps.
He finds that in spite of the hot
weather when bathing is a big essen-
tial, that only about 150 out of about
300 lockers adjacent to shower baths,
are being used at Ferry Field, This
is also in spite of the fact that Water-
man gym with its bath accommoda-
tions for several hundreds is closed
this summer. And the supply of bath
tubs in Ann Arbor hasn't increased
very startlingly this summer either,
Philip Lovejoy, '16, holds the posi-
tion of field secretary with the Play-
ground and Recreation Association of
America, whose headquarters are at
New York City. His address is 5 Tay-
lor street, Portland, Maine.
Edward J. Walsh, '11, recently re-
turned to Cali, Colombia, after a visit
to his home in Denver. Mr. Walsh is
engaged in general importing and ex-
porting business in Cali and last year'
was appointed U. S. bonsular agent for
Western Colombia,
Martin R. Scott, '09, occupies the,
position of actuary with the Royal
Union Mutual Life.
J. C. Goff, '79, head of the Goff-Kirby
Coal Co., of Cleveland, Ohio, has re-
cently returned from a five months'
trip to Japan, where he and Mrs. Goff3
went to attend the wedding of their

"The Russian Attack at Champagne'
-Head from Free Press.
The Russian general did this
through dry land too.
Misery Loves Company
"Congenial club feet.-The Wol-
'Selections from the Poetical Works o
Tom Lovell
The reason for putting the follow-
- ing excerpts may be justified by get-
ting a horselaugh at the Michigan ed
for a hefty lapse of sense of humor,
but here goes,
On Demosthenes
"Now let us leave him toiling there
And ask the question, 'Where stand I
With all my golden chances rare
In everyday that's passing by?'"
Sweltering Smirks
(By George C. Caron)
Bones-Who's that guy over yonder
wiping all the sweat from his face?
Jones-He's the fellow who writes
the wonderful verses for the maga-
zines on the beauty of Nature in the
Help! The Heat's Got Him at Last!
The hot and sticky days are here,
The warm and woozy ones-
The meanest days of all the year-
The days of broiling suns.
The blazing, roasting, toasting days--
When dazzling brilliant bright-
The burning razzling zazzling rays
Beat down on left and right.
Those days are here, and here sit I-
Who e'en would write this verse
And turn it out beneath this sky-
To burn to death ordworse.
But what these darned words are
No one shall ever know-
I'll dedicate and turn 'em out
Unto next winter's snow.
Leap year doesn't seem to change
the old system which makes the groom
the most unimportant man at his own
Some Rough Stuff
Her-Lips that touch liquor shall
never touch mine.
Him-Honesh', Alisi, never toush
m'lips 'tall; went rigsh straight down.
One Pulled at the Temple in Detroit
(We thought we'd tell you so you'd
know it wasn't original with us.)
Someone in back of house in loud
voice-Does anyone in the audience
own a Ford coupe?
Man in front row, jumping up, ex-
citedly-Yes, I do.
Voice in rear-Better go out in
front and rescue it; the ants are pull-
ing it under the sidewalk.
Me and Ring Lardner
Dear ed.-
The other day as i was in Chicago
and talking with ring Lardner, i said
that Al stuff you pulli s putry eesy,
ain't it Ring? and he said yes it's a
graft and there ain't nothin' to it
Dutch and why don't you try it, and i
said I guess I will, only i don't want
to try It on the reeders on the Sat.
Eve. post 1st, because when you run
a show or anything, you always try
it out on a bunch of hicks first, i said.
So I guess I wont sell any of that junk
to the regular papers, but I can try
it out first on a little summer paper
up at the Univ. of Mich., i said. That's
a good idea ring said, but you wont get
much money for youre talent; no i
said, but if i'm around when anyone

Is reading it I'll get something else.
So you see, Editor, I'm sending it
to you first, and you can print it all
I said to Ring, i said, all you need is
put in a lot of right words in the
wrong place and spell them wrong,
and write it down as if you didn't no
nothin' and was a young kid or a wap
or somethin, and people will think
you are a clever guy, i said; and ring
said yes, you got the flivy hunch,
dutch, but ain't they got no regular
writers on that summer-paper? and
i said no, i said, no humorists like
myself. So i said good by ring, I'm


Drawing Instruments, Loose-Leaf Note gooks
Student Supplies in General



Canoe Fountain
Lunches Lunches
for e and
Two T5 Ice Cream

Re pettt's



r 4
Michigan and Fraternity Jewelry
Leather, Gold and Silver
Extra Fine Repairs of Watches and Jewelry

New and Second-Hand

r wu


gonna try that stuff on the little
paper, which is the wolverine, and he
said good by dutch, come and see me
when you are in chi again because we
national humorists must hang togeth-
er, and we'll talk all about ibsen and
G. bernard Shaw next time. and i
went away and am sending this to
you, Ed., and no you wil lreceive it
with open arms, and a laughing mouth
and maybe an open wastebasket and.
a moving foot with a toe on the ensd.
yours sincerely, dutch.
The best theme we can think of
these days for a thesis in a course in
Sociology is-"The Effect of Heat on<
the Temper of an Ordinary Dub."
Next to the lady-bird who chews
gum continually, we don't know of
anyone we'd rather not sit next to in
a movie house more than the girl who
keeps answering her escort with the
intelligent remark-"I'd say so."
And what is louder than a noisy
sport shirt?
Or skirt?
Down underneath the Natural Sci-
ence building, in one of the dim, dark
passages that convey the heating pips'
from the plant near Observatory Hill,
there is a door that is generally closed.
It leads to no dark, mysterious pas-
sage. Nor are there niches in these
catacombs where buried Christians lie.
Appropriate as are the subterraneous
passages for human burial purposes
they aro not used for such. On the
contrary the door leads but to a large,
cool room, where the temperature is
almost constant and there is very lit-
tle light. It is just one of the "dark
rooms" used in physiological botany
for raising plants-simply one of the
many late improvements of the Na-,,
tural Science building.
For Sale or Rent,
Hamilton Business College
State and William

Portage, Wis., July 25.-Will Orpet
was in Portage today, en route to the
west, he said, when recognized and ad-
dressed by a former associate in the
University of Wisconsin.
Orpet registered at one of the local
hotels as James Heinderson of Madi-
son, and his associates registered as
Mrs. G. C. Hyde and C. M. Hyde of
Madison. C. M. Hyde is the name of
one of the instructors in the depart-
ment of journalism at the university,
but it is said that the person here
under that name was not Prof. Hyde.
Prof. Hyde was one of Orpet's In-
The Coolest
Dining Place
in Town is -the
tlea lRoom
-easily reached by north or
south elevators; open from
eight in the mlorning till five
in the afternoon.
The service is high grade,
and all menus are prepared
by a chef who was for a
number of years employed by
one of the leading New York
Noon Luncheon, 50e
Regular Service
a la carte


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