THE WOLVERINE ..... _. __ Orpheum Theatr1 The House of Famous Plays by Famous Players Tues-Dorothy Gish wth OwenHomre io B"SsonRocks the Boot." Trilangle Comedy, "Bath Tub Perils." ev'g. s5c Wed.,:26-Lillian Gish in "The Lilyand the Rose." 'Triangle Comedy, "The Great Vacuum Robbery." Evog. 50 Thurs.-Friday, 27-28-Peggy Hyland in "Saints and sinners." Bray Cartoons ARCADE~ Shows at 3oo, 6:0. 8:eo, 9:30 , Tues. 25-Clara Kimball Young in "The Feast of Life" (Ret.) and Mutt and Jeff Cartoon. Wed.,26- Frances Neluon ton"What Happened at 22," and Mtt" and Jeff Cartoon. Thar.,,07-Harold Lockwood and May Allison in "The Comeback," and Drew Comedy. CAR DEN TheonlyOpen-AieTheatre inAnnArbor Smoking permitted Toes., 25-Nance Oeil is "Souls in Bondage." featuringzNance O'Nieil,thw Bernhardt of thescreen. Wed., 26-"A Texas Steer," a selig com- edy, laid in Texansand Washington, Allotarcast featuring Tyrone Powers. Thurs., 27-"Love' Toll," a remarkable, Lubin produetion. THE WOLVERINE The official student newspaper fo the University of Michigan summe session. Published by the students o Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday af ternoons. Twenty-five issues. Subscription rates-By carrier, sev enty-five cents for the summer mailed to any address for one dolla Advertising rates-Furnished upon ap plication to the business manager. Subscriptions and ads taken at Quar ry's and University Avenue Phar mary. OfficeHours: Managing editor, 2:0 to 3:00 daily; business manages 1:00 to 2:00 daily. Phone 960 o 2414. Address, The Wolverine, Press Build ing, Maynard St., Ann Arbor. Verne 1B. Burnett-Mgaonsg Edito Phone-2414 or 1283-M. C. Verne Sellers-Business Manage, Phone-960 or 1460 Tom C. Reid-Associate Editor H. C. Garrison-Sports Editor Marian Wilson-Women's Editor Walter Atlas-News Editor Bruce Swaney-News Editor Reporters M. H. Cooley R. T. Mane George W. Corwin Frank Martir M. N. Elsenau Phil Pacl R. F. Fitzpatrick Ward Petersor r IT UNITED LINES roit, Ann Arbor and Jackson. Eastern time, one hour faster tad and Express Cnar- Sios. to 7:10p. 0., 9:1 p. m. LimitedCirs-8:4a. m, ad re to 6:48 p. m.; to Lansing, astbound-s 35 a. tn., 6:40a., every two bours to 7:05 p. M., 5 p. M.o10:50p. m. To Ypsi. B a. m. 'Saily except Sunday). 05 p. in., 0605 p. at., 11:45 p. Westound-6:os ain. m,7:50 a. ins hours to 7:50 p. in., 0:40 University School of Music ALBERT A. STANLEY, DIretor "A Gathering Place for Advanced Students" Annual Summer Session EIGHT WEEKS - JULY 3-AUG. 6 Regular FallTerm begins Mon., Oct. 2,1916 Por Catalogue and Information address CHARLES A. SINK,Seorsetary Ann Arbor, Mich. rhe Ann Arbor Savings Bank INCORPORATED 1869 OFFERS Sesurity - Sprvioe - Looation .apital........ .S 300,000.00 surplus and Profit.... $ 175,000.00 tesources .........7.........5,7000.00, Main Office, N. W. Corner Main and Huron Sts. Branch Office, 707 North Univ- ersity Avenue. NSORIAL ARTIST LEAVES NAUGHT BUT CASH REGISTER haves, haircuts, massages and the were scarce on Saturday morning doe's barber shop on North Univer- avenue. It wasn't lack of cus- ers either. They were there and Moe was there to take care of n. The trouble was one of the ex- . barbers left Friday night for De- t. At least that's where he said was going. He left in a hurry, 1gh, and he took every razor, hair lh, clipper, strop and pair of shears he could get his hands on. In. he took about every movable g that the shop contained-except cash register. Mr. Moe's chief re- is that he didn't get that too. It heavy-and empty. ey are back at work now at Moe's the new razors and scissors are and sharp. The worst of it is he a good barber. H. H. Gellert Grace Rose Mary Gratiot Carl Rash H. 14. Haag Jerome Zeigler r s}ineee Staff Wm. H, Hoga Robert M. Schiller Richard Goldsmith llan Livingston TUESDAY, JULY 2, ,191Q Issue Editor- sri J, Rash MICHIGAN SPIRIT In England during the Augustan age there was a certain Joseph Addison who called himself the Spectator, and went around noticing and publishing the little correctable faults In the folk of his time. A similar character came into The Wolverine office recently and reported some facts which are too close under, the students' noses to be seen, perhaps. He finds that in spite of the hot weather when bathing is a big essen- tial, that only about 150 out of about 300 lockers adjacent to shower baths, are being used at Ferry Field, This is also in spite of the fact that Water- man gym with its bath accommoda- tions for several hundreds is closed this summer. And the supply of bath tubs in Ann Arbor hasn't increased very startlingly this summer either, NOTES FROM ALMNI Philip Lovejoy, '16, holds the posi- tion of field secretary with the Play- ground and Recreation Association of America, whose headquarters are at New York City. His address is 5 Tay- lor street, Portland, Maine. Edward J. Walsh, '11, recently re- turned to Cali, Colombia, after a visit to his home in Denver. Mr. Walsh is engaged in general importing and ex- porting business in Cali and last year' was appointed U. S. bonsular agent for Western Colombia, Martin R. Scott, '09, occupies the, position of actuary with the Royal Union Mutual Life. J. C. Goff, '79, head of the Goff-Kirby Coal Co., of Cleveland, Ohio, has re- cently returned from a five months' trip to Japan, where he and Mrs. Goff3 went to attend the wedding of their son' Nichigrins "The Russian Attack at Champagne' -Head from Free Press. The Russian general did this through dry land too. Misery Loves Company "Congenial club feet.-The Wol- verine. 'Selections from the Poetical Works o Tom Lovell The reason for putting the follow- - ing excerpts may be justified by get- ting a horselaugh at the Michigan ed for a hefty lapse of sense of humor, but here goes, On Demosthenes Except- "Now let us leave him toiling there And ask the question, 'Where stand I With all my golden chances rare In everyday that's passing by?'" Sweltering Smirks (By George C. Caron) Bones-Who's that guy over yonder wiping all the sweat from his face? Jones-He's the fellow who writes the wonderful verses for the maga- zines on the beauty of Nature in the summertime. Help! The Heat's Got Him at Last! The hot and sticky days are here, The warm and woozy ones- The meanest days of all the year- The days of broiling suns. The blazing, roasting, toasting days-- When dazzling brilliant bright- The burning razzling zazzling rays Beat down on left and right. Those days are here, and here sit I- Who e'en would write this verse And turn it out beneath this sky- To burn to death ordworse. But what these darned words are about No one shall ever know- I'll dedicate and turn 'em out Unto next winter's snow. Leap year doesn't seem to change the old system which makes the groom the most unimportant man at his own wedding. Some Rough Stuff Her-Lips that touch liquor shall never touch mine. Him-Honesh', Alisi, never toush m'lips 'tall; went rigsh straight down. One Pulled at the Temple in Detroit (We thought we'd tell you so you'd know it wasn't original with us.) Someone in back of house in loud voice-Does anyone in the audience own a Ford coupe? Man in front row, jumping up, ex- citedly-Yes, I do. Voice in rear-Better go out in front and rescue it; the ants are pull- ing it under the sidewalk. Me and Ring Lardner Dear ed.- The other day as i was in Chicago and talking with ring Lardner, i said that Al stuff you pulli s putry eesy, ain't it Ring? and he said yes it's a graft and there ain't nothin' to it Dutch and why don't you try it, and i said I guess I will, only i don't want to try It on the reeders on the Sat. Eve. post 1st, because when you run a show or anything, you always try it out on a bunch of hicks first, i said. So I guess I wont sell any of that junk to the regular papers, but I can try it out first on a little summer paper up at the Univ. of Mich., i said. That's a good idea ring said, but you wont get much money for youre talent; no i said, but if i'm around when anyone Is reading it I'll get something else. So you see, Editor, I'm sending it to you first, and you can print it all I said to Ring, i said, all you need is put in a lot of right words in the wrong place and spell them wrong, and write it down as if you didn't no nothin' and was a young kid or a wap or somethin, and people will think you are a clever guy, i said; and ring said yes, you got the flivy hunch, dutch, but ain't they got no regular writers on that summer-paper? and i said no, i said, no humorists like myself. So i said good by ring, I'm s f ' I r 3: Drawing Instruments, Loose-Leaf Note gooks Student Supplies in General UNIVERSITY BOOKSTORE CANDIES CANDIES Canoe Fountain Lunches Lunches for e and Two T5 Ice Cream SPOPaUA Re pettt's Johnsons' Thorpe's r 4 Michigan and Fraternity Jewelry Leather, Gold and Silver WATCU BRACELETS Extra Fine Repairs of Watches and Jewelry H ALLER (Q FVLLE STATE STREET JEWELERS SUMMER SCHOOL TE XT BOOKS New and Second-Hand r wu : 1 i i 3 i t t gonna try that stuff on the little paper, which is the wolverine, and he said good by dutch, come and see me when you are in chi again because we national humorists must hang togeth- er, and we'll talk all about ibsen and G. bernard Shaw next time. and i went away and am sending this to you, Ed., and no you wil lreceive it with open arms, and a laughing mouth and maybe an open wastebasket and. a moving foot with a toe on the ensd. yours sincerely, dutch. The best theme we can think of these days for a thesis in a course in Sociology is-"The Effect of Heat on< the Temper of an Ordinary Dub." Next to the lady-bird who chews gum continually, we don't know of anyone we'd rather not sit next to in a movie house more than the girl who keeps answering her escort with the intelligent remark-"I'd say so." And what is louder than a noisy sport shirt? Or skirt? NOT A ROMAN CATACOMB BUT SIMPLY A BOTANICAL NURSERY Down underneath the Natural Sci- ence building, in one of the dim, dark passages that convey the heating pips' from the plant near Observatory Hill, there is a door that is generally closed. It leads to no dark, mysterious pas- sage. Nor are there niches in these catacombs where buried Christians lie. Appropriate as are the subterraneous passages for human burial purposes they aro not used for such. On the contrary the door leads but to a large, cool room, where the temperature is almost constant and there is very lit- tle light. It is just one of the "dark rooms" used in physiological botany for raising plants-simply one of the many late improvements of the Na-,, tural Science building. TYPE WRITERS For Sale or Rent, Hamilton Business College State and William WILL ORPET EN ROUTE FOR WEST Portage, Wis., July 25.-Will Orpet was in Portage today, en route to the west, he said, when recognized and ad- dressed by a former associate in the University of Wisconsin. Orpet registered at one of the local hotels as James Heinderson of Madi- son, and his associates registered as Mrs. G. C. Hyde and C. M. Hyde of Madison. C. M. Hyde is the name of one of the instructors in the depart- ment of journalism at the university, but it is said that the person here under that name was not Prof. Hyde. Prof. Hyde was one of Orpet's In- structors. The Coolest Dining Place in Town is -the fDback tlea lRoom -easily reached by north or south elevators; open from eight in the mlorning till five in the afternoon. The service is high grade, and all menus are prepared by a chef who was for a number of years employed by one of the leading New York clubs. Noon Luncheon, 50e Regular Service a la carte .