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PAOX 1 OrR
THE MICHIGAN DAILY
FRIDAY, JMY 2, 1954
?AG~ oU TU-MCH-A -ALYFRDA. JLY-.9.
OF BESSIES AND BOSSIES:
'Two Seeds Short' Is Sad Tale of Hopwood Winner
By RUSS AU WERTER
For our money, Burton Welcher,
'55 Hopwood winner, English hon-
ors student, and recipient of a
University scholarship, is one of
the most likely to succeed under-
graduates.
Mr. Welcher has lived a varied
and interesting life which has in-
cluded activities such as cotton
picking, roughnecking on an oil
rigging, sailing to South America,
starting a novel, and cowpunching.
Caught heading south on State
Street for a short visit to the land
of his birth Mr. Welcher was per-
suaded by the Daily to give in
his own words a short resume of
his life. He spoke substantially as
follows:
"I was found floating down the
Pecos River in a saddle bag in
1933; whether I was born up at
the head of the river in New Mexi-
co or down in Texas nobody knows.
"I lived with a poacher who was
a very industrious and silent man,
so till I was about seven all the
words I knew were howdy and
see ya. I was socialized primarily
by coyotes and still like to lie out
In the sun at times and stretch and
groan in the morning.
Internationalist
"I learned English from a Mexi-
can who had learned it from a
Cherokee; that's how I became
a sort of internationalist at 8,
but nobody ever understood me.
Until I was 12 I thought that all
there was in the world were ranch-
ers, mexicans and a few coyotes
of somewhat dubious character.
"When I was thirteen I went
east to Arkansas. There I met the
first woman and, cow I ever knew.
The woman's name was Bessie
and the Cow's name was Bossie.
Bessie bit me and Bossie kicked
me. I learned how to rope cows
but never women. Even though I
have never been able to repress
it, I know this was my first and
only great trauma.
"I lived up on a ridge two miles
from town and all straight up.
I used to calculate and calculate
trying to figure out how I could
go to town and come back going
down hill both ways. One day I
thought I had it so I went to town.
On the way home I realized I had
made an error. I have been home
since.
Become a Preacher
"At 14 I was too old for a
nursery school, too ignorant for
a high school, and too young for a
university so I became a preacher.
One night I had all of Okasee coun-
ty nearly converted to the Two-
Seeds-In-The-Spirit Baptist Church
Crosby in Hospital
For Routine Check
SANTA MONICA, Calif. ( -Bing
Crosby's doctor says the reason
the crooner entered St. John's Hos-
pital Wednesday was for observa-
tion of a kidney ailment he has
had for several years.
It is one of the periodic check-
ups Crosby has, Dr. Frederick C.
Schlumbergersaid T h u r s d a y.
There has been no flareup of the
ailment-which he declined to de-
scribe-and no surgery is contem-
plated at this time, the doctor ad-
ded.
-Daily-Russ AuWerter
THIS HAT DIDN'T LOOK LIKE THIS WHEN I BOUGHT IT'
when the meeting tent fell down
on us. I thought it was a sign
of God and raced to the river with
my fervent followers behind me.
When I jumped in I nearly cracked
my skull--The Methodists had not
only pulled my tent out from under
me, but also dammed up the
stream. A week later they damned
me too and I had to leave Okasee
County forever. So now as far as
I know I'm the only Two-Seeds-
in-the-Spirit Baptist in the world.
"From there I went to Happy
College. A middle class, middle
sized, college in the middle west.
It was run by the Four-Seeds-In-
the - Spirit - Baptist Church and
when the boys whom I lived with
heard that I was a Two-Seed-In-The
-Spirit man they immediately tried
to save my soul. But they couldn't
so I was sent to the Arch-Deacon
of the college church who couldn't,
then I was sent to the dean of men
who couldn't, so I was s e n t
to see the president of the happy
college who was unhappy there-
after because he couldn't. So I was
sent away because I was two
seeds short.
Yale
"I had been accepted at Yale
and all the spring of my freshman
year at Happy College I walked
around dreaming that I was there
already, but it seemed no different
than Happy College and so I went
to Michigan.
"At Michigan I lived in a Quad
where I met a guy not very un-
like myself and so we were soon
isolated. My last experience as a
resident of the quad occurred a-
round Thanksgiving two years ago.
My friend and I ate everything
at the dinner table and being over-
ly full each of us agreed to pay1
the other ten dollars if he ate
anything before next Monday.
"Everybody knew that we were
starving ourselves and it became
a matter of honor to continue. One
short swarthy guy on my floor'
who was at the time going around
with a girl with legs like a tree
trunk tempted us with a box of
food he had gotten from home. It
contained a huge fruit cake and
dates and figs.
"He was very stingy and only
offered us his food because he
knew we wouldn't accept. I al-
ways answered something like-if
I took one I'd take the whole
thing and he would say go ahead.
On Saturday my friend and I de-
cided to give our idea up so we
had to sneak in and out of the
dining room.
"On Sunday after the usual offer
of food I suddenly accepted and
departed with the whole box. I ate
the last of the figs in a small room-
ing house on Packard Street.
Phys. Ed
"As far as phys. ed. is con-
cerned I started with golf, but
dropped it because all anybody
ever said was about golf. When
I took tennis I had no idea that
it was such a long walk down
that hill.
"I got around to the courts final-
ly sometime in the middle of No-
vember and was hoping t h e y
would let me drop because I knew
I never would be able to make
such a long walk in the cold again.
They did, but told me that if I had
come just once they would have
failed me. In the spring I signed
up for weight lifting because it
was very close to the campus.
But on my first trip to the gym
as I watched a guy lying on his
back lifting weights puffing like
a choo chbo train I knew I would
never be back.
"I got many post cards, but
that was nothing new by then. The
next fall I took weight lifting a-I
gain but didn't even go once.
Last semester, I completed the
weight lifting course. I didn't go
much but made up the hours I
had missed in the last week. I
worked out live whole days and
although Ihave no statistics I
believe that on the last Saturday
of school I was one of the strong-
est men in the University."
Questions
We asked Mr. Welcher to com-
ment on several pertinent topics.
The following are his answers:
On Women-particularly those
looking for husbands: "To a wom-
an a man is like a house. First she
sees what is there then sees what
she can alter. If there is a pos-
sibility of a great deal of altera-
tions the man is marriage materi-
al. However, if a man is the boss
the first time he is with a woman
he always will be.
On Religion: "I am beginning
to wonder whether there is even
one seed in the spirit."
On college: "I gained ten pounds
in college. The old man that gave
out towels at the men's gym was
a heck of a good guy.
On politics : "I hate organiza-
tions. I have never joined one.
I was safe during the red witch
hunt. I'll be safe when the white
witch hunt comes, and the blue
one, and the green one, and the
orange, too.
On the midwest: "Wheat and
Swedes."
On work: "I have always felt
that pensions should always be
given to people from 18 until the
time they're 35. The only trouble
with this is that everybody would
probably kill themselves at 34."
On Sex: "I think it's important."
Lake Current
Studies Enlist
Aid of Bathers
Fourth of July vacationers loll-
ing on the sands of Lake Huron
may find themselves painlessly
participating in a study of lake
currents recently begun by the
University's Great Lakes Research
Institute.
Institute members last Tuesday
set afloat more than 500 "drift
bottles" which they expect to be
washed up on the Huron's beach-
es within a week or two.
The sand-weighted bottles, put
afloat from 98 stations on the lake,
each contain a postcard to be re-
turned to the Institute. The num-
bered postcards, along with data
the finder of the bottle will in-
clude, will enable scientists to de-
termine how far the bottle was
carried by the current before be-
ing washed ashore.
Cooperating with the University
in this experiment are the U.S.
Fish and Wildlife Service and the
State Institute for Fisheries Re-
search.
According to Prof. James T.
Wilson of the geology department,
chairman of the Great Lakes In-
stitute Council, the experiment
will be repeated twice during the
summer, with the results to be
published in the fall. /
'U' Resumes
Weekly TV
13r1oadcastIs
The University will resume its
regular weekly schedule of tele-
casts with three programs being
presented tonight over WPAG-TV.
One broadcast in the "Gallery
of Women" series being presented
in conjunction with the "Woman
in the World of Man" summer
session program will also be pre-
sented tonight over WUOM-FM and
the University's Flint s t a t i o n,
WFUM-FM.
Opening the television schedule
will be an interview at 6:55 p.m.
with Frank Kline, assistant direc-
tor of city park recreational acti-
vities, on "Dateline Ann Arbor".
Also included in the program will
be film excerpts from the June 12
commencement, and a film feature
showing equipment used at the
Nuclear Congress held at the Uni-
versity last week.
"Studio Sampler," being pre-
sented at 7:30 p.m., will include
a program of Mexican folk songs
and a photo documentary on the
Law Quadrangle.
Following this at 8 p.m. is the
"Sports Parade", a program of
University and community sports
news, interviews, and instruction.
A dramatic presentation based
on the trials of settling northern
Michigan in the year 1827 will be
presented onhradio at 9:30 p.m.
today. The story, "Land Sharks
and Ague," is based on the account
of Caroline Kirkland's actual ex-
periences in the early days of
pioneering in Michigan.
'Australia' Topic
Of Speech by Dale
A man who has traveled widely
in Australia, Edward Everett Dale,
professor emeritus of history from
the University of Oklahoma, will
speak at 4:15 p.m. Tuesday, July
6, in Auditorium A, Angell Hall.
The speech, entitled: "Australia:
Observations and Impressions" is
sponsored by the University His-
tory Department.
Professor Dale was a Fulbright
professor to Australia last year
when he added to his travels
through the country by studying
universities and colleges.
An interest in cattle which
started when Professor Dale was
a cowboy on his own ranch has
lasted throughout his life. With
his knowledge of ranching he is
also qualified to speak on Aus-
tralian economic life which is so
dependent on cattle.
Backers Say Bingo
Motion on Ballot
LANSING ( --Backers of a
constitutional amendment legaliz-
ing charity bingo yesterday claim-
ed they had enough signatures to
insure placing the proposal on the
November ballot.
E. J. McLaughlin of Merrill.
president of the Michigan Assn.
for Non-Profit Charities, the
sponsoring organization, said that
the group now has 316,000 signa-
tures. Before the filing deadline
on Friday, he added, the total was
expected to increase to about
325,000.
The petition needs 287,000 valid
signatures.
Steer Away
BATTLE CREEK, Mich. ()
-Farmers in this area were
warned yesterday to strip off
low or broken branches from
wild cherry trees, after three
Hereford steers died mysteri-
ously.
The steers died at the Fran-
cis Fairchild farm in Pennfield
Township, Calhoun County.
They were subjected to post
mortem. Dr. Ted Jackson, Bat-
tle Creek veterinarian, said
death was due to wilted cherry
leaves the steers had eaten.
Although the leaves are not
ordinarily poisonous, he said,
the wilting action produces a
toxic effect.
January - June
Output Listed
By 'Big Three'
DETROIT (A-General Motors
Corp. reported yesterday its U.S.
1,607,534 cars and 249,485 trucks
in this year's first half.
The total compares with 1,637,072
cars and 325,505 trucks built in the
same 1953 period.
This year's January-June output
includes 79,415 cars and 20,668
trucks built in Canada. Canadian
output in the same 1953 period was
95,592 cars and 39,534 trucks.
GM's June production this year
was 274,576 cars including 9,934
built in Canada, and 36,983 trucks,
including 2,890 built in Canada.
June output last year was 308,924
cars including 17,484 built in Cana-
da, and 44,314 trucks including
6,287 built in Canada.
Ford Motor Co. yesterday re-
ported its January-June output at
1,090,200 cars and trucks, com-
pared with 786,082 in the same
1953 period. Chrysler's 'roduction
for this year's first half w a s
426,720 cars and trucks. In the
comparable 1953 period Chrysler
divisions built 758,568 cars and
trucks.
hIez Pilk, Lecturer,
Dies at Home Here
Inez Pilk, lecturer and bendle-
manufacturing consultant died
early last night at her home on
South State Street.
Miss Pilk was sceduled as one
of the speakers in the "Woman in
the World of Man" series this
summer. She will be replaced by
Edith Pechstein, composer.
Mrs. Pechstein is currently as-
sociated with the Bartlette Music
Research Foundation at Harvard
University.
Services for Miss Pilk will be
held Saturday afternoon.
Religious Services
Religious services will be held at
8 p.m. tonight in the chapel at
the Hillel Building. The ceremony
will be a student service, headed
by Sandy Jarashow.
A mixer is scheduled at the
Hillel Building from 7:30 to 10:30
p.m. on Wednesday. Dancing and
refreshments are planned.
The most effective means of
reaching students and faculty of
The University is the advertising
columns of The Michigan Daily.
Democrats Plan To Insure
Bi-partisan Election Boards
LANSING-1f---Michigan Demo-
crats yesterday were all set to
start court actions anywhere in
the state to insure bi-partisan elec-
tion boards.
Neil Saebler, chairman of the
State Central Committee, said the
committee had distributed ready-
made mandamus suits to county
and district chairmen.
Require Equal Numbers
The suits would force election
officials to obey the state law re-
quiring equal numbers of Repub-
licans and Democrats on election
boards.
"This year," Staebler said, "we
are determined that our candidates
will not be counted out by one-
party election boards."
"We should keep clearly in mind,'
he added, "that what we are striv-
ing for is not litigation, but observ-
ance of the law by election offi-
cials. We should exhaust our pre-
liminary non-legal remedies before
Plan Language
Talks, Clubs
The romance language depart-
ment has planned a summer pro-
gram for students interested in
French and Spanish.
Weekly lectures will be given on
topics of interest to teachers of
French and Spanish, followed by
informal meetings with the speaker
in the French-Spanish House at
1027 E. University.
Two language clubs, the Cercle
Francais and the Sociedad Hispan-
ica, will meet every week in the
Kalamazoo room of the League.
Weekly afternoon sessions of
the informal conversation groups,
the Petite Causette and the Pla-
tica espanola, are to be held in the
Round-Up Room of the League.
An address by Prof. Otto Graf
of the German department, part
of the series for language teach-
ers, will be given at 3:30 p.m.
Tuesday, 429 Mason Hall. The to-
pic will be, "Co-ordinating High
School and College Language Pro-
grams.
Lydia Courte is scheduled to
present a lecture-recital on signi-
ficant moments in French music
at 8 p.m. Wednesday in the Kala-
mazoo Room, under the, auspices
of the Cercle Francais.
Tax Collections
LANSING (P)-Michigan took
290 million dollars in taxes on re-
tail trade in the past 12 months,
the State Revenue Department re-
ported yesterday.
The department said sales tax
collections for the fiscal year end-
ing June 30 totaled $276,500,000
-about $500,00 more than bud-
get estimates had anticipated.
we institute suits, but where elec.
tion officials put themselves above
the law, we should be prepared to
go the full length."
Chairmen Briefed
The local chairmen, he said, have
been provided with specific pre-
liminary non-legal steps, prelimin-
ary legal moves, a legal brief
containing appropriate court cita-
tions and a petition for mandamus.
A U. S. Senate investigation of
the 1948 election of Sen. Homer
Ferguson and gubernatorial re-
counts in the next two elections
Staebler said, showed election a-
buses in "Republican controlled"
areas.
The Republican-controlled 1954
Legislature, he added, failed to
enact legislation to insure bi-parti-
san electionboards.
"The general public has cause
to inquire whether the Republican
party leaders who run Michigan
elections are afraid of bi-partisan
election boards," Staebler said.
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