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April 22, 2014 - Image 4

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The Michigan Daily, 2014-04-22

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4A - Tuesday, April 22, 2014

The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com

4A - Tuesday, April 22, 2014 The Michigan Daily - michigandailycom

gie ${*idgigan 4IaU{j
Edited and managed by students at
the University of Michigan since 1890.
420 Maynard St.
Ann Arbor, MI 48109
Unsigned editorials reflect the official position of the Daily's editorial board.
All other signed articles and illustrations represent solely the views of their authors.
'13-'14 Edgar Awards
Throwing shade and underpaid since 2003
Back when J. Edgar Hoover, that infallible defender of our
constitutional rights, was playing dictator and spying on
Americans as head of the FBI (not unlike the NSA), The Michigan
Daily's editorial page handed outthe Edgar Awards annuallyto individuals
and institutions best embodying his many admirable characteristics. Of
necessity, we revived the tradition in recent years.
And so, without further ado and to the game. This was obviously due to technical
delight of those smart enough to get our super difficulties, yeah let's go with technical
awesome jokes, we present the 11th annual difficulties ... yeah definitely technical
Edgar Awards: difficulties ... because technology is hard.
In an unprecedented three-peat, the Miley After being arrested for a DUI, Justin
Cyrus "We Can't Stop" Award goes to the Bieber gave a deposition worthy ofatwo-year-
Central Student Government presidential old brat. "I don't recall" became a frequently
election for its candidates who were unable used phrase as Bieber forgot simple life
to stop suing the crap out of each facts, like whether or not he had been
other. They can't stop! The CSG to Australia. So our Justin Bieber
presidential candidates have shown Amnesia Award goes to Stephen M.
tremendous consistency by suing / Ross for forgetting that the Business
each other in three straight elections. school is already named after him, and
And they won't stop! And so, for an thus continuing to donate hundreds of
unparalleled show of dependable millions of dollars to the school. Here's
comedic excellence, we award CSG to the Stephen M. Ross Stephen M.
its third Edgar award in three years. Ross School of Business!
Truly amazing to snatch up a majority The "How I Met Your Mother"
of ... er plurality ... no, majority ... uh, series finale Award goes to the
all of the awards. It's their party, they graduating seniors. Because though
can sue who they want to! we'd all love to believe in happy fairytale
The Heahcare.gov Award goes to endings, our most realisti and most
sophomore forward Mitch McGary likely destiny after college is to hastily
for breaking down when he was get married, then get divorced, then get
needed most. Michigan basketball pregnant and then finally grow up at the
was ranked seventh in the AP rankings at sight of our illegitimate love child. Well, that
the start of the men's hoops season, McGary might be a bit dramatic, but we'll probably get
and sophomore guard Nik Stauskas were divorced - half of us do.
poised to carry on in Trey Burke's absence. Walter White's Heisenberg 'SAY MY
Then McGary's back took a big poop and let NAME!' Award goes to the University's
down millions of people across the country, new President-elect, Mark Shlizzel ... uh,
condemning them to fandom death. Just Slissel ... Schlesselle ... um ... whatever.
like when the broken healthcare website Finally, we'd like to award ourselves - The
condemned millions of people to actual MichiganDailyEditorial Board-ThePolar
death. Not really, but both were sad. Vortex Award for being a bunch of freezing,
The "Drunk in Love" Award goes to ice cold-hearted idiots hated by everyone who
Mary Sue Coleman for her heavily slurred was stuck inside and bored enough to pay
and relatively incoherent halftime speech attention to what we were saying. Boy, that was
during the Michigan-Nebraska football one rough winter semester.
Barry Belmont, Edvinas Berzanskis, David Harris,
Rachel John,Nivedita Karki, Jacob Karafa, Jordyn Kay,
Aarica Marsh,Megan McDonald, Victoria Noble,
Melissa Scholke, Michael Schramm, Matthew Seligman,
Paul Sherman, Allison Raeck, Linh Vu, Meher Walia,
Mary Kate Winn, Daniel Wang, Derek Wolfe

What about the color green?

An alternate history

leopatra's image is mostly
associated with dramatic
eye makeup, shoulder-
length dark hair
and an elaborate
golden crown,
all adorning
a face that
could conquer
powerful men.
This image of
Cleopatra has NIVEDITA
been deeply KARKI
ingrained in our
brains through
popular culture.
This semester, I took a mini
course in classical civilization
titled CLCIV 125 - Cleopatra.
What prompted me to take this
class was the fact that Cleopatra
was a pharaoh of Egypt and ruled
an entire kingdom, but the only
concept that I'd been brought up
to associate with her name was
immeasurable beauty. Her name
ignited the image of a person whose
face could mesmerize anyone.
I consider myself a feminist.
I've been writing my column for
The Michigan Daily in my pursuit
to attract female students to
technology and entrepreneurship,
and to call on the University to
recognize the gender imbalance
currently in place in computer
science, my intended major. Thus,
the perception of Cleopatra was
one that perpetuated one of the
ideas that I've been fighting all this
time; the idea that in order to be
powerful, to do anything of mass
significance, a woman has to be
beautiful. The idea that in order
to be remembered in the pages of
history, a woman's appearance had
to be able to charm and attract.
There's one important similarity
that I've noticed between the
history of technology and the
history associated with Cleopatra,
what we know has come through
ages of documentation made by a
single, like-minded majority: men.
Specifically, Caucasian, European
men. For women in technology,
this has meant that their names
have faded from the rich history of
computer science (did you know the
first ever computer programmer
was a female?), and for Cleopatra
this meant that the focus shifted
from her work as a pharaoh
to her relationships and her
physical appearance.
Among the texts I read in

my class, several cite Greek- though Egyptian culture accepted
male historian Plutarch's work women rulers, it also required
word-for-word. The problem is them to be accompanied by a male
Plutarch associated Cleopatra's counterpart. Much like her female
political moves almost entirely predecessors, Cleopatra had to
with her looks. When mentioning share her throne first with her
Cleopatra alongside powerful father and later with her brothers.
Roman men such as Julius Caesar However,itwas Cleopatra'scourage
and Mark Antony, he uses the and will to protect her country that
words "captivated," "succumbing," came across when she travelled to
"brilliant beauty" and "evil ... love." Rome to form relations with Julius
Plutarch's work not only seemed Caesar. Later, after Caesar's death,
to have influenced literary work, but she went on to have relations with
also TV shows and movies including Mark Antony.
HBO's "Rome" and "Cleopatra" When most think of Cleopatra
starring Elizabeth Taylor. With they associate her image not
the limited information available with administrative power, but
about her, this makes you question with immeasurable beauty and
if we could ever really know the sexual charm. However, one must
real Cleopatra. Though there's no understand that had it not been for
factual evidence for the kind of the Egyptian culture of a female
relationships Cleopatra had with ruler requiring a male partner,
the aforementioned men, Plutarch's Cleopatra might have never had
depiction takes away from what to form romantic relationships (if
Cleopatra did for her kingdom she didn't want to, that is) with the
as ruler. Romans or Greek men in power.
Seeing myself recognize these And if that was the case, who knows
partialities, what kind of a
these single- Cleopatra we
gender accounts These single-gender would've all
of history, I known.
realize that accounts of history What would
I've become create a biased Cleopatra be
acutely aware remembered for
of Cleopatra's view of how we if our historical
remarkable accounts
work as a ruler. perceive the past. of her were
A member of documented
the Ptolemaic by a female
dynasty - a family of Greek origin historian? Would they have
that ruled Egypt after the death of highlighted her work more? Been
Alexander the Great - Cleopatra more empathetic? Not contribute
was the last active pharaoh of to Cleopatra's hyper-sexualization
Egypt. While being proficient in over two millennia?
Greek, she learned how to speak the And this makes me wonder, had
native Egyptian language and also women documented the evolution
picked up several other languages. of the tech and entrepreneurship
As a result, Cleopatra almost never industries too, would we hear of
neededtranslators when conversing Grace Hopper as often as we hear
with non-Greeks, making her of Steve Jobs? How different would
outreach more profound. things be for me as a girl pursuing
Egyptian kingship culture was computer science in college today?
almost always influenced not just would the dot-com boom from the
by the ruler's administration of the late 1990s and the ongoing mobile
country,butalsobythe his/herrole in apps revolution have stemmed
religion. Cleopatra was highly aware from the wide interests of both
of this fact, and depicted herself as men and women? Would male
the New Isis, an Egyptian goddess. participants not have objectified
Egypt flourished under her rule, and women in Hackathon projects? Or .
with her adoption of the Egyptian would women and men both have
culture, she comes across as a more objectified each other?
personable and understanding ruler It's so strange that it's hard to
than any of her ancestors. imagine such a reality.
As to her relationship with
Caesar and Antony, what is - Nivedita Karki can be reached
important to mention is that at nivkarki@umich.edu,

Hunting for more than eggs

The two most sleepless nights
of my childhood were a yearly
occurrence. Fueling my insomnia
was anticipation. One night,
Christmas Eve, was for the
surprises Santa Claus would bring,
and the other was the night before
Easter, for the hidden colored eggs
I would soon search for.
Both are excitingto a small child,
but I took a particular fondness to
searching for Easter eggs. It's a
completely ridiculous exercise and
to this day I still have no idea what
the meaning of an Easter egg hunt
is, but it was the perfect activity
for the completely ridiculous child
that I was. Because in my mind, I
was the best Easter egg finder there
ever was.
My strategies were methodical.
My system was infallible. Every
inch was scanned, every closet
opened, every drawer checked,
every room meticulously covered
until the two dozen colored eggs
had emerged. It didn't matter
where they were hidden: behind all
of the soup cans, in the microwave
or on top of a lamp twice my height,
none of them could evade my egg-
hunting prowess.
Even outside of colored eggs,
I've spent a lot of time trying to

find things. Trying to find things
is a lot of what education is. I dis-
covered that when given an equa-
tion, I could find 'x' pretty easily,
and before I knew itIwas in college
studying engineering, trying to find
more things.
But finding things is tiring.
Eventually finding the eggs becomes
a laborious task, done to prevent a
forgotten egg from rotting away in its
hiding spot. Some can live a fulfilling
life of findingthings, but as I went on
I continued to think that maybe the
"finding life" wasn't for me.
As the oldest of four siblings, I
had mastered the art of pretending
to believe in Santa and the Easter
bunny. Even though they would leave
out the best cookies they made for
Santa, it was still slightly depressing
to eat the cookies, tricking them into
thinking it was the jolly old man. But
far less depressing was hiding Easter
eggs for my youngest siblings.
Finding the most ridiculous
spots to hide an egg was a blast.
It was the same enjoyment I once
experienced when uncovering the
eggs was flipped, and scheming to
find the craziest hiding spots and
thinking of the laughter my siblings
would have when they uncovered
it. The same laughter of my own

childhood. The contentment in
being the egg hunter had been
replaced with that of the egghider.
Just like the eggs, one thing I've
found out from myyears of education
is that I've always loved watching
and helping others find things.
Learning material is wonderful,
but explaining it to others and
watching them understand is much
more enjoyable.
I've spent much of my time at
school volunteering with high
school students as a tutor, a mentor
and someone to help them not just
find 'x' but their own path. And
the chance to help them find these
things, the chance to perhaps
inspire them, is why I do it. The
excitement of seeing my siblings
find the Easter eggs, the lightbulb
moment of a student when he or she
figures outa solution, is why I want
to teach.
For now, I'm still on the path
of an engineering degree that my
application out of high school put
me on. Perhaps I have more things
to find for myself, but one day I'll
find my way backto the classroom, to
teach students to find their own way.
David Harris is an
Engineering sophomore.

I don't know at what point it truly dawned
on me. As I recall, it was more an accumulation
of little hints and tip-offs throughout my
first year at Michigan before it finally hit me,
without mercy.
If I had to choose a specific point, it could
have been when I realized I could never afford
to move in with my friends the following year
at Landmark. It could have been earlier than
that, during Winter Break, when everyone
was booking their plane tickets back home
to places like San Diego and the coasts of
New Jersey. Or it could have been later, when
conversation began centering on which uncle
or whose friend's mom everyone was going to
get in contact with about a summer internship.
These were the sorts of characteristics of
a color of people that I began to find myself
in regular contact with. They all spoke a
different type of language. They said things
like "closed party," "my cousin at Columbia"
and "what's FASFA?"
When I return to my hometown in metro
Detroit, I am vigorously reminded of the
differences between my upbringing and the
upbringings of my green classmates. For
the first time, I compared my uniformed
1,000-square-foot home to the Snapchats in my
inbox of faraway places with manicured pools
and Congressmen neighbors. I started to resent
the necessity of my school-year employment I
had previously thought was the norm. I began
to feel that I was entitled to a trip to Europe
on my parents' bill, because that's what I was
hearing from my greener counterparts.
From these same people I hear, "Michigan
was my fall-back school," "I can't go to Detroit,
I'll get shot," or "The only thing decent in

this state is the University." It's degrading to
students like myself, who owe their success
to their father's manufacturing job in the
automotive industry and in-state tuition.
Straddling two cultures, while at the same
time questioning which one it is you actually
belong to, is as confusing as it is domineering.
whenever I see my own elderly neighbors,
my friends at home and favorite high school
teacher, they all raise their eyebrows and make
sure to ask me, "how is itngoing over there at the
big school?" When I'm back in metro Detroit,
I am distinguished by my accomplishments at
Michigan. But when I'm in Ann Arbor, Iam put
down with subconscious comments.
But I am now a rising senior, and am
accustomed to socializing with students
whose skin color is not just black, brown,
yellow or white, but also green. Though my
interactions with vibrant greens initially
discontented me with the reflection of my
own duller shade, today I know that it has
increased my understanding of colors that are
not just synonymous with race, but that are
also propagated through income brackets. My
experiences at Michigan sometimes dilute
my perception of wealth distribution. But my
studies at Michigan have taught me that even
being a dull shade of green still means being
exponentially more privileged than the vast
majority of others throughout the rest of the
state, country and world.
Michigan students are black, brown,
white, yellow, red, orange, gray, purple and
green. But most importantly, we are all maize
and blue.
Kristen Anderson is ans LSA junior.

I wasn't just doing it for myself, but for my
city, my family and my nation, and there's
no better motivation."
- Boston Marathon runner Shalane Flanagan said at a news conference after finishing the 2014 race.
The 118th running of iconic American marathon took place one year after the tragic bombings in April 2013.



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