Family Focus
PARENTING/MAZEL TOVI
Make Moving Easier
Share concerns with family; check
for programs for new students.
uestion: I am in the eighth
grade. My parents just told me
my dad has to change jobs,
which means that our family will have
to move. To make matters worse, the
new job is located in another state. I'll
have to start a new school in January,
and I don't know anyone! How can I
make new friends and fit in
when everyone else has been
together since September?
Q
Answer: What seems scary
now can become a new and
exciting adventure for you
and your family. Sometimes
things that we worry about
the most provide us with the
greatest rewards. Check with
your parents to see if it is pos-
sible to visit your new school
before winter break so that it
will be more familiar to you when you
start.
Have your parents check to see if
there are any programs specifically
designed for new students. Check with
the school counselor, too, as he/she can
be very helpful in making you feel at
ease.
Also, see if there are any clubs, activi-
ties or teams you can join. This is a
great way to meet other kids your age
who share similar interests.
This move may be a stressful time for
everyone in your family, including your
parents, so try to be aware of this. Ask
to have a family meeting where every-
one can share feelings and concerns.
Talking together is a great way to brain-
storm and come up with ideas that will
help ease the transition.
Lastly, be sure to spend some time
with friends and family before the move.
Celebrate the connections you've made,
while looking forward to the new ones
you'll be making.
Be sure to get phone numbers and e-
mail addresses so that you'll be able to
stay in touch. Remember that although
this move may be difficult at first, it
may also serve to strengthen the bond
between your family members.
Q: I have two children, one in the
fourth grade and another in the seventh
grade. I know my oldest is on Facebook
and MySpace, but I now believe my
youngest may be on those sites as well. I
am worried about both of them, but am
not sure how to handle this. I need some
advice!
A: As a parent, it is not
only your right, but your
responsibility to regularly
monitor your children's use
of the computer, especially
the Internet. This includes
knowing their passwords
and the sites they visit. Set
up firm rules and guidelines
as to what is acceptable and
unacceptable. Make sure the
computer is located in a place
where it is visible, and where
you can monitor your children when
they are using it.
Although many seventh-grade chil-
dren do visit sites like Facebook and
MySpace, it doesn't' mean that you have
to allow it if you're not comfortable with
that. Fourth grade is much too young to
be on those sites. These sites are easily
accessible to all ages, and this is what
makes them risky.
Be honest with your children, shar-
ing your feelings openly. Tell them that
you are not "spying" on them or invad-
ing their privacy, but that you will be
checking on the sites they are visiting
frequently, just to ensure their safety.
This should be a non-negotiable option
if they will be using the computer.
Invest in software that permits you to
have access to the sites your child visits
as well as software that can deny access
to various sites as needed. The Internet
can be a wonderful resource, but it is
also one that needs to be constantly and
carefully monitored.
❑
Suzi Epstein of West Bloomfield is a longtime
elementary counselor in the Birmingham
Public Schools. She earned a master's
in guidance and counseling and also has
a private practice. Direct questions to
SuziEpstein@gmail.com .
C16 March 5 • 2009
Dec. 16
Brad and Beth
Rosenberg of West
Bloomfield are
thrilled to announce
the birth of the
daughter, Emily
Jane. She is the sis-
ter of Ian, 5. Proud
grandparents are
Bob and Kay Weprin
of Sylvania, Ohio, and David and
Mardi Rosenberg of West Bloomfield.
Nov. 5
Jill (Moskowitz) and
Steven Ingber of
Huntington Woods
announce with much
love the birth of their
son, Jacob Harrison
(Yosef Chaim).
Ingber
Proud grandparents
are Barbara and Jay
Moskowitz of Miami
and Roberta and Paul Ingber of
Farmington Hills. Jacob is named in
Meredith Bess
Berlin will be
called to the Torah
as bat mitzvah on
Saturday, March 7,
at Congregation
Beth Shalom in
Oak Park. She is the
Berlin
daughter of Ellen
and Howard Berlin
and big sister of Ian
and Joey. Proud grandparents helping
her celebrate will be Rosie and Mark
Schlussel and Barbara and Albert
Berlin.
Meredith is a sixth-grade student
at Norup International School in Oak
Park. For her mitzvah project, she has
been making blankets for needy chil-
dren through the National Council of
Jewish Woman.
Alec Gray
Chapman, son
of Terri and Jerry
Chapman and broth-
er of Jacob and Ryan,
will celebrate his bar
mitzvah as he reads
from the Torah at
Chapman
Temple Israel in West
Bloomfield Saturday,
March 7. Sharing
in the simchah will be his proud
grandparents Audrey and Clifford
loving memory of his maternal great-
great-grandfather, Joseph Goodman,
his paternal great-great-grandfather,
Jacob Ingber, and his paternal great-
grandfather, Harold Ellias.
Aug. 31
Erica (Auster) and
Matthew Wikander
of Grand Rapids
are thrilled to
announce the birth
of their daughter,
Eleanor Ruth.
Wikander
Ecstatic grandpar-
ents are Marcia
and Barry Auster
of Farmington Hills and Barb and
Craig Wikander of North Muskegon.
Eleanor, whose Hebrew name is
Simcha Ruth, is named in loving
memory of her maternal great-
grandmother, Selma Mazur, and her
paternal great-grandmother, Ruth
Vanderven.
Chapman, Sandy Berman and Larry
Berman.
Alec attends Cranbrook Middle
School in Bloomfield Hills. Among
his many mitzvah projects, volunteer-
ing at Yad Ezra in Berkley was the one
he found most meaningful.
Andrew Blackstone
Colton will read
from the Torah on
the occasion of
his bar mitzvah at
Temple Israel in
West Bloomfield
Saturday, March
Colton
7. He is the son
of Courtney and
Mark Colton and
the brother of Brian and Chase: His
proud grandparents are Elinor and
Michael Blackstone and Gloria and
Bruce Colton. His late great-grand-
parents were Marjorie and Samuel
Kaufman, Jane and William Sigmund,
Edna and Kenneth Blackstone, Estelle
and Manuel Gorman and Diane and
Sol Colton.
Andrew is a student at Derby
Middle School in Birmingham. His
most meaningful mitzvah project
was participating in the Kids Helping
Kids Charity Walk.