Ellen Weiss and Bernie Pollack enjoy a dance at the Saturday night party.
Disc jockey Dwayne Evans played everything from Big Band to Top 40 music.
awareness," they advised. This
awareness leads to the major function
of communication in a relationship.
"You want to learn about yourself and
about the other person," Mrs. Heman
Walt MacDonald led a workshop on "Playing and Solving Problems Together."
Rabbi Sherwin Wine spoke at the Oneg
Shabbat and singles service on the theme
Rev. David Blake gave an upbeat acount on how to be single after divorce or widowhood.
having everything your own way." In
order to share one's life with others,
Blake recommended that singles have
a sense of self-worth, have a will-
ingness to take risks and have a sense
of the quest being worth it.
Communication is important to
the survival of a relationship, and
husband-and-wife team, Rose and Art
Heman, led a discussion illustrating
how this is so. Communication, they
said, is a process, whose major corn-
ponent is awareness. "You won't do
anything in your life without some
The Hemans, couple communica-
tion Instructors, broke down
awareness into smaller components:
interpretations, sensations, feelings,
intentions and actions. Interpreta-
tions they described as expectations,
beliefs, values and assumptions. Sen-
sations are the "raw data you take in
with your senses." Feelings are "spon-
taneous emotional responses to the
world around you." Intentions are
goals and actions, "what you're doing
now, what you did in the past, what
you'll do in the future." In order to get
your message across using one of the
five components, the Hemans said a
statement must be accompanied by
the word "I."
MacDonald, who counsels persons
in relationships in his private prac-
tice, addressed the topic of "Playing
and Solving Problems Together: How
to Fight, Negotiate and Compromise."
One of the most important com-
ponents he found in a relationship is
shared values. "Pick someone whose
values are similar to yours," he advis-
ed. In solving a problem in a relation-
ship, each person's values have to be
clear to the other. He called values a
"useful connecting strategy."
Honesty also has an important
part in interpersonal relations, Mac-
Donald said. "If you don't have truth-
THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS