Bob McKeown Ellen Weiss and Bernie Pollack enjoy a dance at the Saturday night party. Disc jockey Dwayne Evans played everything from Big Band to Top 40 music. awareness," they advised. This awareness leads to the major function of communication in a relationship. "You want to learn about yourself and about the other person," Mrs. Heman explained. Walt MacDonald led a workshop on "Playing and Solving Problems Together." Rabbi Sherwin Wine spoke at the Oneg Shabbat and singles service on the theme "Relationships." Rev. David Blake gave an upbeat acount on how to be single after divorce or widowhood. having everything your own way." In order to share one's life with others, Blake recommended that singles have a sense of self-worth, have a will- ingness to take risks and have a sense of the quest being worth it. Communication is important to the survival of a relationship, and husband-and-wife team, Rose and Art Heman, led a discussion illustrating how this is so. Communication, they said, is a process, whose major corn- ponent is awareness. "You won't do anything in your life without some The Hemans, couple communica- tion Instructors, broke down awareness into smaller components: interpretations, sensations, feelings, intentions and actions. Interpreta- tions they described as expectations, beliefs, values and assumptions. Sen- sations are the "raw data you take in with your senses." Feelings are "spon- taneous emotional responses to the world around you." Intentions are goals and actions, "what you're doing now, what you did in the past, what you'll do in the future." In order to get your message across using one of the five components, the Hemans said a statement must be accompanied by the word "I." MacDonald, who counsels persons in relationships in his private prac- tice, addressed the topic of "Playing and Solving Problems Together: How to Fight, Negotiate and Compromise." One of the most important com- ponents he found in a relationship is shared values. "Pick someone whose values are similar to yours," he advis- ed. In solving a problem in a relation- ship, each person's values have to be clear to the other. He called values a "useful connecting strategy." Honesty also has an important part in interpersonal relations, Mac- Donald said. "If you don't have truth- THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS 103