I can already hear my sister’s
response to this column: “WE GET
IT SYLVANNA, YOU’RE GRADU-
ATING EARLY.”
My younger sister, Phoebe, is
probably happy I started off with a
blatant acceptance of how humble-
brag this space can get. So there you
go, Phoebe. This is my public accep-
tance that I, Sylvanna Leah Gross,
am kind of an asshole.
Moving forward.
This space is meant to be a com-
ment on how every senior is in this
weird limbo of almost having to
be an adult with taxes and mort-
gages while still forgetting that you
should be taking vitamins every
day, not just when you remember
you should be taking them. It’s
dedicated to seniors who feel like
they’re occupying a liminal space
where they can’t be considered
full-blown adults yet, but are being
forced to make very adult decisions.
It’s for people like me, who are
scared to move forward.
Being scared isn’t a bad thing.
It’s a natural response to going into
the unknown. It’s what you should
be when something happens that
you’re not familiar with. From my
basic understanding of the sciences,
it’s a biological response. So why are
seniors so scared of being scared?
For me, it’s the fact that for the
first time there is no absolute for-
mula for what we have to do. Grow-
ing up, I knew the formula that my
teachers pounded into my head:
high school, college, job. But it was
relatively easy to make the jump
from high school to college. One
quick application, a couple of rejec-
tions and a couple of acceptances
and one decision to the best public
university in the world.
But now, the jump isn’t as clear-
cut. I could get a job. Or I could get
a master’s degree or go into a doc-
torate program or earn a fellowship
or go into an internship or take time
off and travel (this last option is
not supported by my bank account,
unfortunately).
I’m the type of person who always
had a plan. But for the first time in
my life, I have no clue what my next
step will be. I know I want to go
to law school, but I also know I’m
not ready yet for that step. Because
once I go, I have to get a job. And
once I get a job, that’s my life.
I completely understand that I
am making this process feel way too
black and white. Of course there are
alternative ways of living your life,
and there are many reasons why I
am being insensitive to how I had
the privilege of going to college and
so am not in the place to complain.
But, I am complaining. Because I’m
scared and I know a lot of you are too.
So here’s some tips on relaxing
and being less scared for at least 10
minutes.
1. You are not alone
2. It will feel like you are alone
but let me repeat, YOU ARE NOT
ALONE
3. But maybe, find yourself a
quiet place and be alone physically
4. Put on your relaxing music
(U2 or some Jason Mraz puts me in
a good mood)
5. Drink a glass of water
6. Lay in your bed
7. Put your phone down and
turn on “Do not disturb”
8. Just listen (it is very possible
you might mistake this as a nap, it is
very important you do not mistake
this as a nap)
9. Think about your mom, or
dad, or siblings, or significant other
or any person who stands beside
you no matter what
10. If you want to pass on step 8
for whatever personal matter, think
about cute cuddly puppies or think
of the funniest memory you have
11. Remember, you are not alone.
2B
Magazine Editor:
Karl Williams
Deputy Editors:
Nabeel Chollampat
Lara Moehlman
Design Editor:
Shane Achenbach
Photo Editor:
Zoey Holmstrom
Creative Director:
Emilie Farrugia
Editor in Chief:
Shoham Geva
Managing Editor:
Laura Schinagle
Copy Editors:
Emily Campbell
Alexis Nowicki
Taylor Grandinetti
the statement
Wednesday, September 28, 2016 / The Statement
How To: An Incomplete Guide to Getting a College Degree
B Y S Y LVA N N A G R O S S
the
tangent
EMILIE FARRUGIA/DAILY
T H O U G H T B U B B L E : D EBAT E S
“I’ve been thinking about Andy Warhol’s idea of
repetition in his work. His idea is that with the
repetition of an image, that image is then deflated
of meaning. I disagree with Warhol’s notion as
of late because the more I see the presidential
candidates ,the less numb I feel about them.
Watching the debate was disturbing on many
levels. What was even more disturbing was seeing
everyone laugh about it. People can laugh all they
want, but one of those two people will be leading
our country very soon.”
– Art & Design Senior Benjamin Leigh