Saturday, February 15, 1941
THE MICHIGAN DAILY
Page Nine
Here Is The Acid Test For That
'Beautiful Gal Way Back Home'
Stay Away
From The East
Young Man
Our J-Hop Is A Blessing After
A Trip To Girls' School Formal
Dancing Party, With Cookies
There are wanders in the esst,
smangthem the Brooklyn Dodgers.
There are perversions of nature-out-
door phenomena to behold. There
are also indoor formal dances at girls'
schools. We shall speak of the latter.
We shall whisper these things in-
to your ear, because they are still
a secret to many of the uninitiated
who still fancy themselves the swains
of fair damozel. There is no glori-
fication of the male in Madam's
School of Learning.
We are speaking of those deluxe,
education - f or - money - but - you - find
nice-girls, perfumed purloined, sacro-
sanct schools of women. When they
throw a party, you know you've been
some place.
It happens with a breath-swishing
alacrity that startles the novice. He
stalks into pink-marble halls, and
meets a pink-cheeked girl, with a
pink chiffon dress. You might call it
a junior prom dress, my girl does.
Yes, Lochinvar does all this, then it
begins.
He looks around for a friend. He
sees more girls in pink frocks, more
pink marble malls, another pink
cheek. There are no friends.
But astride Lilliputian chairs is a
chaperone's line. These seating places
were never meant for chaperones
lines, and vice-versa. In fact, vice-
versa of a certainty. When you mince
an approach to these personages they
rise, in a flutter of fluff and shrill
language. These folks greet the great.
You are the great.
You pass out. When you reach the
hall, there is dance music. Some-
times the fiddler halts to repair a
string. Then the cellist must saw
by himself. It's not hep, nor is it
hot. It is strictly drawing room.
That is where they serve the lunch.
Usually this is no less than a cookie,
a plate of condiments, lemon, and hot
water. You do not eat, you behave.
Other people watch you behave.
When you leave the girls insult
you. That is the east.
FINE LEATHER WATCH STRAP
Nothing quite so practicatlhha beenod. Fur
your pnrotetion the trde nam e i stamped on
every strap, your assurance of highest quality.
-o
One of the most desirable features T. D. H. Asserts That
of an affair like this J-Hop is that it
is a powerful antidote for tons of hot Graduation's The Thinq
air which are dispensed on this cam- One of the persons attending to-
pus on "how absolutely 'gorgeous' night's party will be Thomas Dudley
that girl back home is." (Graduation's the thing) Harmon.
Every fraternity, boarding house, He will be attending with Macgot
or cooperative always has a few of Thom, '42.
those boys who, whenever the sub- It is contrary to Daily policy to
ject of the opposite sex is brought unnecessarily publicize Tom Harmon.
up, will look around at his group of We've insulted him too often already.
listeners with a condescending sneer There are several thousand Michi-
and say, "Of course, out here you gan men who will not attend the fes-
have to be satisfied with what you tival. Their names are available upon
can get, but back home-well that's request.
a different story. The girl that I go
away with at home would be the Yolney H. Jones, University of
most popular girl on this campus if Michigan anthropologist, is studying
she went to school here. She's got refuse at an old New Mexican mis-
everything-looks, brains, personal- sion to learn what the early Span-
ity, etc., etc. iards ate.
Then he will pull out his wallet -
and show a crumpled photograph of -_
a face that you wouldn't have your
worst enemy take out on a blind date.
Then this purveyor of hot air pro-
ceeds into the usual line of apologies
of how the "picture does not do her
justice, how the picture does not dis-
play her personality, how you don't
get an idea of that million dollar
figure etc., etc."
Whenever the boys get back from
the movies and grow ecstatic over the
charms of Lana Turner, Betty Grable,
Hedy Lamarr, this guy will grudging-
ly concede that perhaps those girls
are O.K. for the league they're in,
but really That Girl Back Home is
in a class by herself, he says, coining
a phrase. He then repeats ad nause-
um all the adjectives he has been
using throughout the year.
Then the night of the J-Hop comes
and with it the showdown. He pre-
sents That Girl to his pals. They are
usually polite and they tell her pleased
to meet you with a straight face.
Then when this guy and his girl
have left their company his pals
plunge into a thorough analysis ofi-
the specimen of femininity which
they have observed. Remarks are
made which are such that boastful
boy would not like to hear if he
were present. "Does it really talk?"
one will ask. Others will plunge into IT PAYS TO
a bitter argument whether or not one
would be ashamed to take her to DRESS CORRECTiT
a dog show on a pass. Usually the
dispute ends in a draw. FOR EACH OCCASI
A slight variation of this kind of
pain in the neck is the chap who takes
a girl to the hop who is a University
coed and well known to the boys but
not well-appreciated by them.
He usually apologizes by describing
the ravishing beauty back home who
was all set to come to Ann Arbor for When certain Big
the weekend but at the last minute
found she had to have her tonsils
taken out-or got an attack of lum- a fellow likes to
bago-and couldn't make it.
"What you want at fhe pri'c oue twant to Pay"
MEN'S TOGGERY
EVERYTHING FOR THE MAN
514 Est L tutr I tRT itn /I t G tNt B tL'. . . . PltON. 9068
According4 to
SafflIA, IIush, yoII*Ie
njot well-d ressed
nunless yon fel.. .
Stein Bloch Clothing
offers you that solutiont.
Sold exclusively in Ann Arbor
at Saffell &Hush.
LYN
ION.
Mormns come along in a man's college life --
look his best. And looking one's best means
Saturday night special
For Good Food ... Go To The Union
Dinner in the Main Dining Room
Service from 6:00 until 8:00 o'clock
Late Snacks
Tap Room open until 1:30
Serve Self - Everything Good To Eat.
MICHIGAN UNION
feeling completely at ease - Master of the situation - You can
not do it in clothing that fits improperly - So be dressed cor-
rectly by Saffell & Bush in Stein Bloch Clothes.