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Pn F h TIIF KAr-In AKn flAInVLiMonday, trerruary 9, 148
BEDDED BOUNCER:
Hospitalized Hop Official
Reports Dance Disasters
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(EDITOR'S NOTE: Mr. Wooden-
shoes is recuperating from his two-
night job as official J-Hop Trouble-
shooter for the Universitv. Iis copy-
writed report appears below.)
By WILLIS WOODENSHOES
BED 4, University Hospital, Feb.
Tux,. Taxicab
Woes Harass
Pas opers
Time was, early in the history
of the J-Hop, when dress suits,
were so scarce in the city of Ann
Arbor that harassed young men
whirled their dates around the
dance floor for an hour and then
hastily excused themselves and
bolted back to their rooms and
,gave over the monkey suits to
their friends.
It was generally difficult to ex-
plain why good friends never got
to the Hop at the same time, espe-
cially if the original plan had been
to engineer a double date. Most of
their time was consumed trying
to figure out excuses as to why
they couldn't possibly manage
that double date after all.
The by-gone days when only a
few hacks and a carry-all were
available as transportation also
presented considerable difficulties.
Some J-Hoppers left two hours
before others, and keeping a cabby
waiting in those days ways noth-
ing less than a crime. A passing
thought as to how hoop skirts
managed to fit into carry-alls
might grow into several intriguing
legends, too, and provide further
food for thought during the lull
between February, 1948, and Feb-
ruary, 1949.
I
9--For youse kids floatin' around
on a cloud J-Hop probably was di-
vine, but here's some of da things
that made it hell for me:
1. STRAPLESS FORMALS -
Musta been 100 break down each
night and always I was da one
who had to find glue or tape or
chewin' gum for da lady chap-
erones to fix 'em. I even give me
own suspenders to da cause.
2. LIGHT BULBS - I bet I put
in over a dozen in each booth. Da
lights was goin' out so fast I had
a hard time even findin' da
booths.
3. FAVORS - Not only did I
have to pick up all da playin'
cards every time a girl dropped
'em, I also had to fight off da
boys who wanted to start poker
games wit 'em..
4. ENTANGLEMENTS - One
of da musicians got his head
caught in a slidin' trombone and
it took me half an hour to saw
him loose.
5. GATE CRASHER - One of
da ladies says: "Mr. Woodenshoes,
I hear there is a Russian Army
officer underfoot, ask him to
leave." I found him an hour later
only he weren't Russian, just Dal-
matian-it was "Major," that
damn Delt dog.
6. GUNMAN - Later on da
same lady says: "Willis, that boy
over there has a bulge in his hip
pocket, do you think he'll try to
hold us up?"
"I don't know, lady," I sez, "but
if he does, I sure hope he shoots
a couple of shots my way."
(L'DIToR'S 11' 'E: This sad plaiint
to "recess a tt elap" may have
been written in 1913 (it was), but we
feel its nessage is timeless. Hence
it is reprinted here.)
I've helped you on with my
dress suit. I've buttoned you up
with care. And now you're pranc-
ing with your beaut who's admir-
ing your glossy hair. Ask her, old
top, how my pumps look? Also my
collar and tie. What I didn't lend,
why you took. Are you at the Hop
or am I? I gave you a nip to steady
you. (you quivered so at the knee)
and when I had you ready, you
-borrowed the taxi fee. I'm only
a sophomore, Roomy, but I'm tired
of picture shows. That's why I'm
downcast and gloomy while you're
treading on feminine toes. On the
campus I'm the best dancer.
That's why my poor heart breaks.
Have all the fun you can, sir, but
-I hope your garter breaks.
('
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PLANNED THE WORKS-Members of the J-Hop Committee taking time out to pose together, are,
from left to right, Joe Wimsatt, Dan Treacy, Nancy Culligan, Ann Gestie, Bobby Jo Ream, Bruce
Lockwood, Jo Kitchen and Nancy Hess. Missing is Bob Harrison.
Committee Efforts Produce J-Hop Success
Credit for J-Hop success last ciety, Miss Ream brought to her committee on Music and General
weekend goes to the nine-man J-
Hop committee, elected last No- chairmanship experience on last plans.
vember. year's Soph Prom and as decora- Other committee members were
Bobby Jo Ream as committee tions chairman for the League Nancy Hess, in charge of decora-
chairman carried through overall formal. tions; Jo Kitchen, patrons and
plans for the dance, coordinating Ann Gestie's "prized by Holly- programs; Joe Wimsatt, finances;
sub - committee preparations for wood" talents were lent to the Nancy Culligan, publicity; Dan
the big event. A member of Wy- musical end of the preparations Treacy, buildings and grounds,
vern, junior women's honorary so- with Miss Gestie heading a sub- and Bob Harrison, booths.
I
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306 STATE STREET
. .,
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Join the March of Dimes
O1 N Utt 9o
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Betwteea Liberty and Williams
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