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May 22, 2014 - Image 5

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Michigan Daily Summer Weekly, 2014-05-22
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Thursday, May 22, 2014
The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com

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Los Angeles Times Daily Crossword Puzzle
Edited by Rich Norris and Joyce Nichols Lewis
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25 Journalist Tarbell 24.T.book after AN W H BO L F L I T Z 6ER
et al. Amos J A W L U C I
26 CDprecursors 25 Damage T H E U K C E O S E L H I
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41 Times for action 34 Pisa party T E E D BO RE S E N S E
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43 Rear xwordeditor@aoLcom 05/22/14
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RUN
From Page 1
theme of the race was to act in the
opposite of that, to live your life in
a more selfless way, honoring the
heroes rather than the villains."
All proceeds and donations went
to the Veteran's Association Opera-
tion Enduring Freedom and Opera-
tion Iraqi Freedom Returning
Service Members Fund to honor
DeWolf's work with the Ann Arbor
VA Health System during his time
in the city.
Earlier in the day, DeWolf's fam-
ily held a ceremony to plant a Red
Oak tree in the courtyard of the
medical school. Speakers included
DeWolfe's aunt and uncle, his par-
ents, Kris and Thom, and sister
Rebekah.
Kavita Vinekar, a classmate and
friend of DeWolf's who recently
graduated from the University's
medical school, said she was
pleased by the way the entire
community came together to
remember Paul's legacy with an
optimistic spirit. One of the orga-
nizers of the 5K, she hopes to see
memorial events for DeWolf con-
tinue and grow in the future so that
his legacy lives on.
"This gave us an opportunity not
only to come together as a commu-
nity that's been grieving recently,
but also a community that seeks to
celebrate someone who was truly a
special person," Vinekar said.
CABLE
From -Page 2
said. Compared to some European
providers, she said U.S. broadband
is in many respects technologically
inferior.
Experts have noted that the
AT&T-DirectTV merger was moti-
vated, to a large extent, by a shift
toward mobile television services.
In the same way that television
delivery moved from the airways
to cable in the 1950s and 60s, the
future of television may see a move
from cable delivery to wireless ser-
vices - accessed through mobile
phones and tablets.
"Delivery technologies change,"
Lotz said. "The advantage of wire-
less is its mobility - we are still a
long way from the kind of com-
pression technology to allow the
amount of data to be transmitted
wirelessly relative to a wired line."
Given that some of the technol-
ogy needed has yet to be developed,
the transition will likely be a very
lengthy process.
"Is that probably where we're
ultimately heading - yes," Lotz
said. "But that's decades away."

A new poke

he had clear, beautiful skin,
perfect for shoving a needle
into; or so it had seemed, when
I first scanned my
partner's arm for
a suitable vein.
Medical stu-
dents practicing Ap
the placement of f
intravenous lines
on one another
abide by the basic MIKE
real estate prin- YEE
ciple of location,
location, location.
With the tourniquet tied and the
antiseptic applied, I wondered dimly
whether the target vessel had been
scrubbed away entirely in the course
of my preparatory cleaning. In its
place I could discern only the faintest
hint that a vein had ever even existed,
a mere discoloration of the skin, a rip-
ple on the surface where once thun-
dered a proud tributary of her heart's
coursing river.
I had placed a few intravenous
lines, but only for anesthetized
patients in the operating room.
Never before had I attempted the
same feat under the close scrutiny
of the recipient herself. The added
pressure left my senses addled;
whereas my initial assessment was
that of an easy "poke", now the vessel
seemed to shrink before the advanc-
ing needle, dwindling in size even as
my trembling hand drew close. I had
the impossible task of spearing an
earthworm with a whaling harpoon.
If my ineptitude distressed my
partner, her calm and composed
visage did not betray the slightest
duress; a casual observer might
have mistaken my fumbling with
her limb for a manicure rather
than a possible tattooing. Unfor-
tunately, I could not lay claim to
the same stable stoicism. My vis-
cera ran wild, as if on a caffeine-
fueled bender, twisting themselves
into shapes unimagined by even
the most creative balloon artists.
I never perspire, even under exer-
tion, but now Dagobah monsoon
season erupted on my brow.
Was I hallucinating, or was her
vein actually moving? I shook my
head - no, there it was again. It not
only moved, it danced, juked like
Denard, swayed like Rick's on St.
Patty's Day. We had been warned
of "rolling" veins, but this one
rolled like a Del Amitri-Limp Biz-
kit-Creedence Clearwater Revival
mash-up. For a moment I worried
that the vessel would rise out of
her arm and battle for control of

the needle.
Pinning the tail on the evasive
donkey was taxingto say the least. I
had to solve the Schrfdinger equa-
tion, calculate probability distribu-
tion space, channel my inner Zen. I
became one with the beveled edge
and guided it not where Heisen-
berg's vein was but where it would
be. It was all in the wrist, and even-
tually, so was the needle.
A flash in the line signified that
I had struck red gold, that indeed,
There Will Be Blood. Quickly, I
advanced the catheter into the ves-
sel lumen, threading it over the
introductory needle. So proud was I
of this momentary accomplishment
that I failed to close off the open
end of the catheter fast enough,
sending a torrent of crimson slosh-
ing across the table.
Though my partner looked
unconcerned, I hastened to grab
the syringe of intravenous fluid
that would occlude the open hub
and stem the bleeding, but blood
on my glove caused it to elude my
grasp and careen out of reach. With
the desperation of Mitch McGary
diving headlong for an errant
fast break pass, I skittered after
the syringe, caught it on the first
bounce and capped the line. As the
fluid flowed into circulation, so too
did the tension bleed away from me.
Our long search for IV access had
ended in vein.
The ordeal replayed at the other
tables around us, as pairs of medical
students did their bloodiest renditions
of Dexter scenes. The number who
fainted or passed out left the room
less reminiscent of an IV workshop
than a mass casualty event. I realized
then that the goal of the session was
not to make us masters of line place-
ment, butto appreciate the nurses and
technicians who routinely establish
access even in very difficult patients.
For injection drug abusers who had
blown all of the usual veins, Ihad seen
nurses and techs who could find viable
vessels in all sorts of bizarre locations.
The practice I received made me mar-
vel at their artistry that much more.
I was roused from my reverie by
motion in my peripheral vision. In
one fell swoop, my partner had deftly
taken up her own needle and pinioned
my arm fast. The slightest sugges-
tion of a vengeful glimmer in her eye
seemed to say, "Myturn."
I gulped hard with a mouth gone
suddenly dry...
Mike Yee can be reached
at mayee@umich.edu.

was standing in the check-
out line at Kroger two Mon-
day nights ago, when an icy
metaphorical
hand sud-
denly slapped
me in the face
and forced
me to look
at the prod-
ucts I was
preparing ZAK
to purchase: WITUS
Chobani
yogurt,
Smartfood
popcorn, Starbucks coffee,
Annie's Mac & Cheese... The
metaphorical hand was impo-
litely asking me to reflect on my
mindless consumerist habits:
Why had I chosen these prod-
ucts and not others? At the time,
my feeling of self-loathing was
obvious, but its source, some
latent thread running through
the contents of my cart, was
unclear. But, now, having sat at
my desk staring pensively at my
box of Annie's Mac & Cheese for
a weirdly long duration of time,
I have an explanation - cultural
capitalism.
Cultural capitalism consists in
businesses appealing to custom-
ers' ethics for profit, particularly
their environmental ethics. I
argue that Annie's Mac & Cheese
and other similar products syn-
thesize the formerly antitheti-
cal desires to consume and to do
something good for society into
one single consumerist/anti-
consumerist gesture. Thereby,
capitalism manufactures pseu-
do-self-justification, while con-
sumers continue to consume
compliantly.
The Annie's Mac & Cheese
box attempts at befriending
the consumer represent its cul-
tural capitalistic quality. On the
back of the box there's a "letter"
addressed to you, "Dear Friend,"
and it's signed in an fake purple-
ink scrawl by "Annie." On the side
of the box, in a cartoon about how
they produce their mac & cheese,

Annie's
edly int
betwee
who m
Annie's
Partner
Trust...
ducesc
real At
compar
Approv
be a sr
busines
some v
about t
facturi
pany's1
But
out
not a s
busines
images
intimat
pany; t
image t
project
the con
Annie's
ers. Fu
that the
legitim
various
ucts he
also kn
a desir
ethics
nies he
(e.g., n
fair tri
And, th
lar con
the cus
constr
and tru
Whe
& Che
ing int
is evid
Annie'.

illustrates the suppos- worthiness (trustworthiness) as
timate community of trust a friend and business partner.
o itself and the farmers The box proudly declares: "100%
ake the raw material for Recycled Paperboard," "Cheese
Mac & Cheese (e.g., "We from Cows not Treated with the
r With People & Places We Growth Hormone, rBST," "Made
"). The box even intro- with Goodness!" etc. Note how
consumers to Bernie, the the "Made with Goodness!" com-
nnie's pet rabbit and the ment and the "Rabbit of Approv-
ny's official "Rabbit of al" logo signify terms of morality
al." Annie's pretends to and ethics. In light of the box's
mall, mom-and-pop style other ecologically-focused sig-
s by giving the consumer nifiers, the rabbit appears to be
would-be intimate details a metonym for nature and the
heir company, the manu- environment. What Annie's is
ng process and the com- saying, metonymically, is that
pet rabbit. nature approves of their product
the truth is Annie's is and you should too. "Made with
Goodness" isn't just a statement
about good ingredients; it's also
think we supposed to be a statement about
moral goodness. By claiming that
ht not be so buying a box of Annie's means
doing something morally good,
content. good for the environment and
good for society, the box induces
the consumer to achieve the sub-
lime object of his or her consum-
mall, mom-and-pop style erist/anti-consumerist ideology.
ss; it is a corporation. The I don't mean to dissuade inter-
on that box are not truly est in serving the environment,
o details about the com- but companies that participate in
hey are derivations of the cultural capitalism are co-opting
that the company wants to consumers' desire to be eco-
. And, most importantly, friendly and ethical agents for
tsumers are not friends of their own profit. Though often
s; they are paying custom- we feel like we're being ethical
rthermore, Annie's knows consumers by participating, I'm
e customer has few (if any) inclined to believe that the factu-
ately close ties with the al implications of our consump-
s companies whose prod- tion remain largely mysterious
or she consumes. Annie's to most - they at least do to me.
ows that the customer has The danger in cultural capitalist
e to share common core practices like Annie's is that they
with the people/compa- superficially satisfy our desire
or she does business with to do something good for soci-
to child labor, recycling, ety and therefore we don't feel
eatment of animals, etc.). the urge to do something more
herefore, Annie's and simi- profoundly but less conveniently
npanies profitably exploit good. Hence we remain content
stomer's desires through a with the status quo of passively
uction of false friendship serving corporations' interests
ust. instead of the interests of society
an we buy Annie's Mac as a whole. I think we ought not
ese, we' are also buy- to be so content.

Thursday, May 22, 2014
The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com
Anie's Mace Cheoe

5

o a cultural ethics. This
lent in the way that the
s box tries to justify its

- Zak Witus can be reached
at zakwitus@umich.edu.

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