THE MICHIGAN DAILY
Pi
. -
AS IDE
IL INES j
y IRVIN LISAGOI - -
After The Thin Man.. ..
THE THIN MAN again injected his
saturnine personality into the!
sports whirligig yesterday evening as
he waddled into the office, hurdled
a desk and exclaimed with stentor-1
Ian conviction, "The power of the
press, Dr. L., is electric!" And he
thrust a newspaper clipping at us. It
related how the Western Conference
refused to act on the training table
because a reporter had printed that
such action was imminent.
"'Premature publicity,'" scof-
fed the slim skeptic, repeating a
phrase from the clipping. "The
great day of scoops, when an
imaginative verb-vendor extract-
ed stories from the revealing
wrinkles on your brow, is gone.
Amen! Now, if you merely con-
jecture on some possible action
by an august athletic body, like
A.A.A. or the Western Confer-
ence, chances are tremendous
that the exact opposite will oc-
Scur.
"In the olden days," continued the
malnutritioned visitor, "a reporter
could hatch a brainy yarn, like fir-
ing or hiring a big league baseball
coach, or shifting a pitcher to the
outfield, or moving Officer Jim O'-
Donnell back to the suburban pave-
ments, and what happened? If the
Idea was good, the firing was a cinch,
the shifting an even money wager,
and Cop O'Donnell's transfer a night
certainty. Now! Now! Why, you get
repudiated if you suggest even slight
faint disturbances in the olfactory
tract. Amen!
"The late Bill Veeck, Dr. L.,
achieved presidency of the Chi-
cago Cubs when he suggested in
a newspaper story that things
weren't being run strictly accord-
ing to Hoyle. Old Man Wrigley
called him in and told him to go
to work. And he did a good job.
yAmen! Today, they run you out
of town. Amen!"
"Twice now, the Big Ten has de-
ferred action on the training table
because of "premature publicity." At
the May meeting some enterprising
and solicitous reporter might try re-
verse English and propose abandon-
ment of the table idea. Then it's a
cinch." Exhausted by this tirade, the
Thin Man leaped across the desk and
vanished.
* *
Wanted - Pitchers ...
WANTED: YOUNG MEN who'd
like to pitch .for the U. of M.
nine, and have a modicum of
ability to justify that yen. Even
southpaws are included.
This is no gag. After ponder-
ing his 1938 schedule, Baseball
Coach Ray Fisher opines he
could use more hurlers. With 30
games or more on tap, the Wol-
verines need extra mound
strength, and Ray isn't permitted
to visit O.B. confabs 'and barter
for his talent. So he has to ex-
tract it from the student body.
There might be someone "born
to blush unseen" or unwilling, for
some psychological reason, per-
haps, to make his presence
known. Anyone who feels he
might be useful can find the Wol-
verine mentor in Yost Field
House about 2 o'clock any after-
noon.
De Kink' Squawks ... .
KING LEVINSKY, THE NIGHT
MAYOR of Chicago's Maxwell
St. who mauls his adopted tongue far
more effectively than he did a ring
opponent, plans to turn wrestler. And
wants as his first opponent, Bronko
Nagurski.
Sez the Kingfish: "I gave them
big boys hell in the ring, di'nt I?
You tell 'em pal. Now I'm goin' 6
to do the same t'ing in a wressle.
I'm still the king. I'm tough if
they get fresh with me. I'll pin
their ears lopsided. Too bad my
sister Lena ain't here to back me
up. She knows I'm a tough guy,
hotcha!"
The King froze with fright the
night he met Joe Louis at Co-
miskey Park, but he's certainly
thawed out now . . .
THE MAIL BAG. John A. Gee,
Jr., (Big John to his pals) has ac-
cepted a position with the Goodyear
Tire and Rubber Co. and will prob-
ably lend his services on the hard-
wood to his employers
BURR PATTERSON
& AULD ---
Invites you to come and
inspect their Christmas
Gift selections:
Army Accepts
Official College
Eligibility Rul
Academy Settles Old Feud
By Limiting competition
T« Th Year
Oosterbaan Again Faces Heavy Big Leagues Split
Schedule As Wolverine. Scout On Live Ball Issue
---- ---------CHICAGO, Dec. 7.-(A)-The Na-
By BUD BENJAMIN competition here this season, meet- I tional and American leagues, which!
Michigan's athletic traveling sales- ing the Wolverines on Jar. 8. used the "rabbit" baseball through
man is about due to hit the open Oosterbaan won't see that game. their "boom" 1937 campaigns, split
road again. He'll be on hand at the Northwes- wide open today on the kind of ball
1i The gent who spent six of his eight tern. Ohio State game at Evanston they will use in 1938.
I Saturdays this football season de--+ ------- , -----------------------rhThe National circuit voted unani-
I
1 011th liberating over involved charts in 1then watching two future wolver-!
WEST POINT, N. Y., Dec. 7.-t_)_ foreign press boxes and who will ine opponents. The Varsity tacklesn
Army tonight settled, once and for all, probably see his quota of two or three the Wildcats on Jan. 22 and winds upc
the most famous collegiate contro- basketball games this winter-not the season on March 7 against thea
versy over athldtic eligibility by more. no less-is enemy bound again, same crew. Ohio State is strictlyt
changing its varsity rules for athletes "to get the dope." January opposition with a game
to conform with the three-year stand- Travels Extensively scheduled here on the 10th and in
ard in force at virtually every major It's Wolverine scout number one, Columbus on the 24th.
college in the country. Bennie Oosterbaan, whose legal resi- Then Minnesota
The move completed the ceremony dence is Ann Arbor but whose tooth- The rambling Ooosterbaan can't
of "burying the hatchet" that caused brush is apt to be anywhere from even get home after the Evanston
the unfortunate break in football re-! Iowa City to Columbus, and points 'affair. He'll hang over in Chicago
lations with Navy in 1928 and that north, east, south and west. for a night and then depart for a
resulted in the just-concluded breach Bennie's been on the go ever since Monday assignment, this time the
between West Point and the Mid- he began coaching here, and with victim being Minnesota in a game at
West's Big Ten conference through football out of the way, he's turning Minneapolis. They're on the Michi-
1935-37. to a little cage espionage to keep gan schedule Jan. 15 and Feb. 19.
The new rule for Army athletes himself busy this winter. The next week-end will also be
makes every player eligible for just Scouting in basketball-while not spent away from hearth and home.
three years of varsity oompetitionas, intensive as the gridiron variety On Jan. 15, he'll be watching Wis-
whether that competition is at West s consin in a tussle with Purdue at
Point, or at a college in which an-i just as important. Look at Oos-
nathlete mayinaveplayed befoe en- terbaan's tentative schedule if evi- Lafayette, and on Monday night, the
athlete may have played before en- .117th, he'll be scouting another Boil-
tering "The Point." Heretofore, Army dence is desired. 7hermaker opponent in a second ap-
has permitted a player three varsity Watches Iowa, Toledo eraisal-the subject being North-
years at West Point, regardless of his Bennie will apply double concen- western again. His scouting of Wis-
previous collegiate experience, a rule tration in his seasonal debut on Dec. consin is in anticipation of scheduled
bitterly protested by Navy and other 21. He'll be among those present games on Jan. 17 and Feb. 21.
schools. when the home town Toledo Univer-gmorJan.ha nedhis
The new Army eligibility standard sity five tackles Iowa's touring Hawk- routine up to Jan. 22 when he'll
follows closely on the action of the eyes, and as both teams are slated \atino s an. 22 when he'll
Big Ten Conference in its recent con- to meet Michigan during the season, e atch Illinois and Ohio State do bat-
vention in sanctioning renewal of re- it will mean close scouting and htle at Columbus, but you can bet that
l " ,ti - cwith W m"t P. r i t Th .ifhe'll be booked solidly throughout
mously to use a slower, more heavily
covered ball next season, and less than
an hour after this action was taken
the American league decided to retains
the faster pellet which it has used
1
i !M
i
la onswi w esu ront . e m - plenty of wor.
western group also broke off with On Dec. 28 he'll take another sctheinassn teasrice of
Army, beginning with the 1935 sea- glance at Toledo and will call t quits u assignments as well as
sonc overeoad ilcali qispopularity. _____
son, largely over the eligibility rule. for 1937. Earl Townsend, ex-Michi-_--
The immediate question rising for gan cager and brother of Capt. John
gridiron observers was over the status Townsend, will be the Butler scout,
of football stars. of other colleges who his residence in Indianapolis facili-
have entered, or are planning to enter tating his efforts. Groceries - Beer - Wine
the academy. Two of the more prom-Grcie-Ber-Wn
inent of these are Bill Guckeyson, Illini Are Next Ty's Service Market
Maryland's classy back who was a But 1938 will find Oosterbaan back 420 Miller Ave.
plebe, or freshman, at Army this year on the job, this time in Blooming-
and Carl Hinkle, Vanderbilt's All- ton, Ind., on Jan. 4 getting a line on
America center of 1937, who plans to the highly touted Illini. The co-
enter Army. champions of last year open Big Ten
Staeb Days
NL I You're Not Seeing Double, For a Christmas Gift A
It's Only The Culver Brothers fo e e"Nne 1
of Fitted Cases of the
By TOM PHARES track squad. Carl ran the 100 yard
If, some day, you are down at the dash and competed in the high jump Finest Materials and
field house watching track practice and broad jump while Fred was a orkmanship.%
and you see a runner round the turn 220 man in addition to broad jump-I
only to come around again in about ing. Both were members of the city $ .50 to $1 0
10 seconds there are left you but three championship indoor relay team also.
alternatives. Showed Form Some with His Initials.
Either (1) investigate to see if a Carl's best marks were six feet, one_ _
world's record has been broken (2) inch in the high jump, 22 feet, three
rush to the nearest optician and have inches in the broad and he has done i FINE LEATHER BELTS
your eyes examined, or (3) have Coach the 100 yard dash'in :10 flat. In the inl attractive gift boxes
Charlie Hoyt, introduce you to the 220, Fred has done :23.1 around one e
Culver twins, Fred and Carl. The turn and his best broad jump meas- $1.5 to $ .5
chances are Coach Hoyt couldn't dis- ured around 21 feet, six inches. Both i i
tinguish between them but at least show signs of improving under the $ Give him a set of Braces a
your sanity would be temporarily be- tutelage of Coach Hoyt.
yond question. The twins take great delight in I and Garters to match.
A Mole's Difference making the most of their natural co- % $ 150
Fred and Carl Culver are products incidence. In high school, during
of Detroit Central High School, are his reign as president of the class, Carl E very Gift in an
sophomores, are the same size and was given the task of running the
usually dress exactly alike. The only school for a day as a part of the Attractive Gift Box 4
sure fire method of telling them apart Senior Day activities. However an ( TO
is by looking to see which one has a important engagement made it neces- THE DOWNTOWN STORE
mole on his cheek-that's Carl. How- sary that he leave at short notice so FOR MICHIGAN MEN
ever, when they're running around a he slipped in brother Fred who non-
track, Coach Hoyt ,has trouble mak- chalantly signed Carl's name when
ing out a mere mole so that's where pressed by autograph-seeking females.
the trouble comes in. No, you're not seeing double. It's 309 SOUTHN MAIN S'agE
The boys are 19 years old, Carl the Culvers again.
being some 20 minutes older if the-- - ----- -
truth must be known. They are about
five feet, eight inches tall, Carl weigh-
ing 145 pounds and Fred 140. They
are in the same classes on campus and .,.
so far have gotten the same grades!"\
which seems to indicate that even the
professors can't figure it out.
Started In Grades
They first came into athletic pro- " baueis made of carefully selecte
minence back in grade school when enough for Certied)...vita-curcd
Fred was entered in a track field day! to give a cool, sweet smoke from the first puff
at Belle Isle. Carl went along help- ..and beautifully finished.
, y Your college store has Certified Purex-alsoa
ing out in the events in which he THIS PIPE WITH conlete line of other Purex Pipes $1 and $1.0.
was best and they worked under one ANY OTHER AT H. &TERN, INC., BROOKLYN, N. Y.
common name. All in all, the ar- - ANY PRICE! MAKERS OF INE PIPE ,_ v 40 YEARs
rangement proved very successful andFE
the boys about cleaned up the honors.
The name of Culver later became
a double feature on the Central High-°
s
t
i
_ _ _ ___ .
k I
I-M CALENDAR
Volleyball
s c r Ifl' IGtt
7:30 p.m.
Zeta Psi vs. Acacia.
Psi Upsilon vs. Phi Kappa Psi
Sigma Alpha Epsilon vs. Phi
Sigma Delta
Sigma Alpha Epsilon vs. Phi
Sigma Delta.
Handball
7:30 p.m.
Tau Kappa Epsilon vs. Sigma
Alpha Mu
Ice Hockey
10:30 p.m.
Michigan Maniacs vs. For-
estry Club.
The Nicest Gift
.tee. arrr. ,.. +r ®rwrvs+
,";:;
. ,.
.
- ;: p
.-
Of cvI
r1
#44 .. :... M
11
*
*
A GIFT SUGGES~FTION'
Everybody likes Daniel Green Comfy slippers. . . We have
a large assortment of new numbers that are extremely
attractive at very moderate prices.
11