THE MICHIGAN DAILY Pi . - AS IDE IL INES j y IRVIN LISAGOI - - After The Thin Man.. .. THE THIN MAN again injected his saturnine personality into the! sports whirligig yesterday evening as he waddled into the office, hurdled a desk and exclaimed with stentor-1 Ian conviction, "The power of the press, Dr. L., is electric!" And he thrust a newspaper clipping at us. It related how the Western Conference refused to act on the training table because a reporter had printed that such action was imminent. "'Premature publicity,'" scof- fed the slim skeptic, repeating a phrase from the clipping. "The great day of scoops, when an imaginative verb-vendor extract- ed stories from the revealing wrinkles on your brow, is gone. Amen! Now, if you merely con- jecture on some possible action by an august athletic body, like A.A.A. or the Western Confer- ence, chances are tremendous that the exact opposite will oc- Scur. "In the olden days," continued the malnutritioned visitor, "a reporter could hatch a brainy yarn, like fir- ing or hiring a big league baseball coach, or shifting a pitcher to the outfield, or moving Officer Jim O'- Donnell back to the suburban pave- ments, and what happened? If the Idea was good, the firing was a cinch, the shifting an even money wager, and Cop O'Donnell's transfer a night certainty. Now! Now! Why, you get repudiated if you suggest even slight faint disturbances in the olfactory tract. Amen! "The late Bill Veeck, Dr. L., achieved presidency of the Chi- cago Cubs when he suggested in a newspaper story that things weren't being run strictly accord- ing to Hoyle. Old Man Wrigley called him in and told him to go to work. And he did a good job. yAmen! Today, they run you out of town. Amen!" "Twice now, the Big Ten has de- ferred action on the training table because of "premature publicity." At the May meeting some enterprising and solicitous reporter might try re- verse English and propose abandon- ment of the table idea. Then it's a cinch." Exhausted by this tirade, the Thin Man leaped across the desk and vanished. * * Wanted - Pitchers ... WANTED: YOUNG MEN who'd like to pitch .for the U. of M. nine, and have a modicum of ability to justify that yen. Even southpaws are included. This is no gag. After ponder- ing his 1938 schedule, Baseball Coach Ray Fisher opines he could use more hurlers. With 30 games or more on tap, the Wol- verines need extra mound strength, and Ray isn't permitted to visit O.B. confabs 'and barter for his talent. So he has to ex- tract it from the student body. There might be someone "born to blush unseen" or unwilling, for some psychological reason, per- haps, to make his presence known. Anyone who feels he might be useful can find the Wol- verine mentor in Yost Field House about 2 o'clock any after- noon. De Kink' Squawks ... . KING LEVINSKY, THE NIGHT MAYOR of Chicago's Maxwell St. who mauls his adopted tongue far more effectively than he did a ring opponent, plans to turn wrestler. And wants as his first opponent, Bronko Nagurski. Sez the Kingfish: "I gave them big boys hell in the ring, di'nt I? You tell 'em pal. Now I'm goin' 6 to do the same t'ing in a wressle. I'm still the king. I'm tough if they get fresh with me. I'll pin their ears lopsided. Too bad my sister Lena ain't here to back me up. She knows I'm a tough guy, hotcha!" The King froze with fright the night he met Joe Louis at Co- miskey Park, but he's certainly thawed out now . . . THE MAIL BAG. John A. Gee, Jr., (Big John to his pals) has ac- cepted a position with the Goodyear Tire and Rubber Co. and will prob- ably lend his services on the hard- wood to his employers BURR PATTERSON & AULD --- Invites you to come and inspect their Christmas Gift selections: Army Accepts Official College Eligibility Rul Academy Settles Old Feud By Limiting competition T« Th Year Oosterbaan Again Faces Heavy Big Leagues Split Schedule As Wolverine. Scout On Live Ball Issue ---- ---------CHICAGO, Dec. 7.-(A)-The Na- By BUD BENJAMIN competition here this season, meet- I tional and American leagues, which! Michigan's athletic traveling sales- ing the Wolverines on Jar. 8. used the "rabbit" baseball through man is about due to hit the open Oosterbaan won't see that game. their "boom" 1937 campaigns, split road again. He'll be on hand at the Northwes- wide open today on the kind of ball 1i The gent who spent six of his eight tern. Ohio State game at Evanston they will use in 1938. I Saturdays this football season de--+ ------- , -----------------------rhThe National circuit voted unani- I 1 011th liberating over involved charts in 1then watching two future wolver-! WEST POINT, N. Y., Dec. 7.-t_)_ foreign press boxes and who will ine opponents. The Varsity tacklesn Army tonight settled, once and for all, probably see his quota of two or three the Wildcats on Jan. 22 and winds upc the most famous collegiate contro- basketball games this winter-not the season on March 7 against thea versy over athldtic eligibility by more. no less-is enemy bound again, same crew. Ohio State is strictlyt changing its varsity rules for athletes "to get the dope." January opposition with a game to conform with the three-year stand- Travels Extensively scheduled here on the 10th and in ard in force at virtually every major It's Wolverine scout number one, Columbus on the 24th. college in the country. Bennie Oosterbaan, whose legal resi- Then Minnesota The move completed the ceremony dence is Ann Arbor but whose tooth- The rambling Ooosterbaan can't of "burying the hatchet" that caused brush is apt to be anywhere from even get home after the Evanston the unfortunate break in football re-! Iowa City to Columbus, and points 'affair. He'll hang over in Chicago lations with Navy in 1928 and that north, east, south and west. for a night and then depart for a resulted in the just-concluded breach Bennie's been on the go ever since Monday assignment, this time the between West Point and the Mid- he began coaching here, and with victim being Minnesota in a game at West's Big Ten conference through football out of the way, he's turning Minneapolis. They're on the Michi- 1935-37. to a little cage espionage to keep gan schedule Jan. 15 and Feb. 19. The new rule for Army athletes himself busy this winter. The next week-end will also be makes every player eligible for just Scouting in basketball-while not spent away from hearth and home. three years of varsity oompetitionas, intensive as the gridiron variety On Jan. 15, he'll be watching Wis- whether that competition is at West s consin in a tussle with Purdue at Point, or at a college in which an-i just as important. Look at Oos- nathlete mayinaveplayed befoe en- terbaan's tentative schedule if evi- Lafayette, and on Monday night, the athlete may have played before en- .117th, he'll be scouting another Boil- tering "The Point." Heretofore, Army dence is desired. 7hermaker opponent in a second ap- has permitted a player three varsity Watches Iowa, Toledo eraisal-the subject being North- years at West Point, regardless of his Bennie will apply double concen- western again. His scouting of Wis- previous collegiate experience, a rule tration in his seasonal debut on Dec. consin is in anticipation of scheduled bitterly protested by Navy and other 21. He'll be among those present games on Jan. 17 and Feb. 21. schools. when the home town Toledo Univer-gmorJan.ha nedhis The new Army eligibility standard sity five tackles Iowa's touring Hawk- routine up to Jan. 22 when he'll follows closely on the action of the eyes, and as both teams are slated \atino s an. 22 when he'll Big Ten Conference in its recent con- to meet Michigan during the season, e atch Illinois and Ohio State do bat- vention in sanctioning renewal of re- it will mean close scouting and htle at Columbus, but you can bet that l " ,ti - cwith W m"t P. r i t Th .ifhe'll be booked solidly throughout mously to use a slower, more heavily covered ball next season, and less than an hour after this action was taken the American league decided to retains the faster pellet which it has used 1 i !M i la onswi w esu ront . e m - plenty of wor. western group also broke off with On Dec. 28 he'll take another sctheinassn teasrice of Army, beginning with the 1935 sea- glance at Toledo and will call t quits u assignments as well as sonc overeoad ilcali qispopularity. _____ son, largely over the eligibility rule. for 1937. Earl Townsend, ex-Michi-_-- The immediate question rising for gan cager and brother of Capt. John gridiron observers was over the status Townsend, will be the Butler scout, of football stars. of other colleges who his residence in Indianapolis facili- have entered, or are planning to enter tating his efforts. Groceries - Beer - Wine the academy. Two of the more prom-Grcie-Ber-Wn inent of these are Bill Guckeyson, Illini Are Next Ty's Service Market Maryland's classy back who was a But 1938 will find Oosterbaan back 420 Miller Ave. plebe, or freshman, at Army this year on the job, this time in Blooming- and Carl Hinkle, Vanderbilt's All- ton, Ind., on Jan. 4 getting a line on America center of 1937, who plans to the highly touted Illini. The co- enter Army. champions of last year open Big Ten Staeb Days NL I You're Not Seeing Double, For a Christmas Gift A It's Only The Culver Brothers fo e e"Nne 1 of Fitted Cases of the By TOM PHARES track squad. Carl ran the 100 yard If, some day, you are down at the dash and competed in the high jump Finest Materials and field house watching track practice and broad jump while Fred was a orkmanship.% and you see a runner round the turn 220 man in addition to broad jump-I only to come around again in about ing. Both were members of the city $ .50 to $1 0 10 seconds there are left you but three championship indoor relay team also. alternatives. Showed Form Some with His Initials. Either (1) investigate to see if a Carl's best marks were six feet, one_ _ world's record has been broken (2) inch in the high jump, 22 feet, three rush to the nearest optician and have inches in the broad and he has done i FINE LEATHER BELTS your eyes examined, or (3) have Coach the 100 yard dash'in :10 flat. In the inl attractive gift boxes Charlie Hoyt, introduce you to the 220, Fred has done :23.1 around one e Culver twins, Fred and Carl. The turn and his best broad jump meas- $1.5 to $ .5 chances are Coach Hoyt couldn't dis- ured around 21 feet, six inches. Both i i tinguish between them but at least show signs of improving under the $ Give him a set of Braces a your sanity would be temporarily be- tutelage of Coach Hoyt. yond question. The twins take great delight in I and Garters to match. A Mole's Difference making the most of their natural co- % $ 150 Fred and Carl Culver are products incidence. In high school, during of Detroit Central High School, are his reign as president of the class, Carl E very Gift in an sophomores, are the same size and was given the task of running the usually dress exactly alike. The only school for a day as a part of the Attractive Gift Box 4 sure fire method of telling them apart Senior Day activities. However an ( TO is by looking to see which one has a important engagement made it neces- THE DOWNTOWN STORE mole on his cheek-that's Carl. How- sary that he leave at short notice so FOR MICHIGAN MEN ever, when they're running around a he slipped in brother Fred who non- track, Coach Hoyt ,has trouble mak- chalantly signed Carl's name when ing out a mere mole so that's where pressed by autograph-seeking females. the trouble comes in. No, you're not seeing double. It's 309 SOUTHN MAIN S'agE The boys are 19 years old, Carl the Culvers again. being some 20 minutes older if the-- - ----- - truth must be known. They are about five feet, eight inches tall, Carl weigh- ing 145 pounds and Fred 140. They are in the same classes on campus and .,. so far have gotten the same grades!"\ which seems to indicate that even the professors can't figure it out. Started In Grades They first came into athletic pro- " baueis made of carefully selecte minence back in grade school when enough for Certied)...vita-curcd Fred was entered in a track field day! to give a cool, sweet smoke from the first puff at Belle Isle. Carl went along help- ..and beautifully finished. , y Your college store has Certified Purex-alsoa ing out in the events in which he THIS PIPE WITH conlete line of other Purex Pipes $1 and $1.0. was best and they worked under one ANY OTHER AT H. &TERN, INC., BROOKLYN, N. Y. common name. All in all, the ar- - ANY PRICE! MAKERS OF INE PIPE ,_ v 40 YEARs rangement proved very successful andFE the boys about cleaned up the honors. The name of Culver later became a double feature on the Central High-° s t i _ _ _ ___ . k I I-M CALENDAR Volleyball s c r Ifl' IGtt 7:30 p.m. Zeta Psi vs. Acacia. Psi Upsilon vs. Phi Kappa Psi Sigma Alpha Epsilon vs. Phi Sigma Delta Sigma Alpha Epsilon vs. Phi Sigma Delta. Handball 7:30 p.m. Tau Kappa Epsilon vs. Sigma Alpha Mu Ice Hockey 10:30 p.m. Michigan Maniacs vs. For- estry Club. The Nicest Gift .tee. arrr. ,.. +r ®rwrvs+ ,";:; . ,. . - ;: p .- Of cvI r1 #44 .. :... M 11 * * A GIFT SUGGES~FTION' Everybody likes Daniel Green Comfy slippers. . . We have a large assortment of new numbers that are extremely attractive at very moderate prices. 11