THE MICHIGAN DAILX
S
Galley
When earth's last picture is painted
and the tubes are twisted and
dried,
When the oldest colors have faded,
and the youngest critic has died,
We shall rest, and faith, we shall need
it-lie down for an aeon or two,
Till the Master of All Good Workmen
shall put us to work anew.
-KIPLING.
Unwept, Unhonored, and Unsung
No, an Engineer does not run a
train. He is an individual who us-
ually eats left handed and in his na-
tive locus looks like William S. Hart
transplanted. He wears corduroy
chaps and carries T squares and other
impedimenta about his person.
He doesn't pretend to know any-
thing about Anacreon or Madame
Pompadour but he is an enthusiastic
devotee of open work plumbing. In
his own words he is out "to make the
jack."
Are engineers useful in this world?
Very much so. Without them there
would be no laundries, no police sta-
tions, no libraries, no folding beds,
etc.
A Medic' is an individual who car-
ries a femur around as a watch
charm and may frequently be seen in
the wake of pussy cats on moonlight
tights. He carries a bag and a bot-
tle of chloroform. Yes, a Medic does
lots of good in this world. Without
his cemetery space would be just so
much economic waste.
Now a Law is a man who spends ten
dollars for a book without undergoing
hysterics. He sometimes wears a
moustache, indulges in "Isms," is al-
ways looking for. an argument, is as
glib as a Chesterfield or a Morrison.
He is the only man in the world who
can jump his board bill without goingf
in the hoosegow for it. Yes, Laws do
a lot of good in this world. They keep
the jails filled.
A Lit, yes. He sits in class and
dreams of the young onion season back
In his native Lapeer. Our modesty
forbids us to go further. Does he do
any good in this world? (A reward of
three dollars cash will be offered for
the best answer to this highly vital
question.)
Try This Yell on Your Piano
Raw, Raw,
Underdone,
Hectic Gargoyle,
Lots of fun,
Funny. stories, jokes galore,
Rameses II knows some more,
Dig hin up and look them o'er.
Raw, raw, raw.
--GAMBRINUS.
Really, it makes you contemplate
homicide when you read the one about
the undertaker saying, "I'll get yout
yet, etc." Now when Sir Isaac New-
ton was in his youth that was A. G. Ji,
but~we want levity rather than grav-
ty. As Kip says that would be an-
other story.
Tho Curse of an Aching Heart
She loves me,
She loves me not -
Is all a bunch
Of tommyrot.
I tried it on a thistle once,
And this is what .I got.
She lo- SEMPRONIUS.
Famous Closing Lines
Tomorrow I will survey this pillar
of jocularity at the breakfast table
without misgivings. Although I have-
n't been there since 1911, I'll see you
In church. -OMAR.
The Daily at your door every morn-
ing, $2.50 until 'June.-Adv.
WHITI E TO LESSER
CROUPS AT PEACE MEET?
EXPERT SEES GREAT FUTURE
IN USE OF WIRELESS PHONE
1l -
Popular Matinee Wed.
Best Seats $1.50
SHUBERT
ARRI CK
i
Starting Sun. Jan. 26
Nights and Sat. Mat.
50C to $2.00
E i _______i
LEE KUGEL Presents
The
Net
REAL DECISIONS MADE BY FIVE
GREAT POWERS, BUT ON
LIBERAL BASIS
Now that the members of the peace
congress have given Russia a lim-
ited voice in the conference, the
question is raised as to what extent
other factions and political groups
will be admitted, according to Prof.
Edward R. Turner. The privilege of
representation in the congress may be
limited to the five great powers,
Great Britain, the United States,
France, Italy, and Japan, and to the
smaller powers which aided in, the
victory; representation might be
granted to the Central Powers, and as
an extension to this, the doors might
be thrown wide to all recognized na-
tions; or, finally, all kinds of groups,
nationalistic, racial, and factional,
such as the Czecho-Slovaks, the
Letts, Ruthenians, Jews, and even
socialist, labor, and suffrage repre-
sentatives might be admitted
Have Only Moral Influence
At any rate, says Professor Tur-
ner, the only influence which faction-
al parties like the Bolsheviki, and
even the smaller nations around the
peace table, can have upon the actual
business of the congress will be the
amount of persuasion that their
spokesmen can exert upon the repre
sentatives of the five great nations
that will in reality make the deci-
sions. Nothing tiut confusion could
posibly result if an attempt were
made to conduct the enormous busi-
ness of the conference by allowing
actual power to each of the many
assembled nations, each clamoring
for its own interests.
Inner Group Must Dominate
The necessity of settling the great
and varied problems in the most
practical and expedient way, and as
quickly as. possible, precludes, ac-
cording to rofessor Turner, the pos-
sibility of doing without a great
deal of private negotiation and se-
cret agreement. He thinks it very
probable that the actual policies of
the conference were decided upon to a
considerable extent in secret meet-
ings between the great powers be-
fore the first formal session began.
Smaller powers no doubt negotiated
in the same way to decide upon the
exact demands that they would make.
Thus the busines of the conference
itself becomes largely a routine mat-
ter of regulation and procedure and
of the ratification of previously ar-
ranged agreements.
New Spirit Rules Conclave
The chief difference between the
world congress of today and the great
congresses of Vienna, of Paris, and
of Berlin, will not be so much a
difference of method as of spirit, in
Professor Turner's opinion. The ne-
cessity for swift and efficient deci-
sions, unhampered by petty squab-
bling, and governed by the minds of
men accustomed to world affairs, ex-
ists today as then. But in place of
the autocratic reactionism which lay
behind the workings of 'past con-
gresses we have today the enlight-
ened spirit of progress and liberal-
ism, governed by motives broad in-
stead of selfish, and by motives chos-
en with justice rather than expe-
diency in mind. Coupled with this
,spirit, of course, is a determination
to form such a concert of nations that
in the future it will be impossible for
any nation or group of nations to pre-
cipitate a great war upon the world.
AMERICA HAD LONG RANGE
GUN AGAINST BIG BERTHA
Detroit, Jan. 25.-Had the war
lasted longer 4merica might have
startled the world with a long range
gun which would carry 50 miles far-
ther than the famous big Bertha
used by the Germans in attempting
to terrify Paris. The ordnance de-
partment of the United States army
had almost perfected a big gun which
would have had a range of 125
miles.
The expense of the gun, however,
would have been so great and the
damage that it could have done
would have been so slight, that the
production of the gun in large num-
bers would not have 'been practical.
Chemical Honor Society Initiates
Phi Lambda Upsillon, national hon-
orary chemical fraternity, held its
first semester initiation banquet
Thursday evening at the Hotel
Whitney. Dr. E. C. Lang acted as
(By Associated Press)
London, Jan. 25.-(British wireless)
-"By the time the peace treaty is
signed we shall be talking across the
Atlantic by wireless," says Godfrey
Isaacs, managing director of the Mar-
coni Wireless Telegraph company, in
an interview. "One day -in the not
far distant future," he adds, "I think
we shall walk about with wireless
telephones attached to our bodies and
we shall be able, standing say in Pic-
adily Circus, to call up a friend who
is flying somewhere. Or we may have
an invitation by wireless telephony
from a friend flying in France to join
him at dinner in the evening.
"Wireless telephony has been very
largely used in war for communica-
tion between airplanes and headquart-
ers and for arti-llery work. But there
is no reason why it should not be
available over very much longer dis-
tances."
MEXICO TO DIVIDE NATIONAL
LAND AMONG SMALL FARMERS
(By Associated Press)
Mexico City, Jan. 25.-A, project
for the division of national lands of
Mexico among small farmers and
ranchers is expected to be presented
by President Carranza to the present
session of the Mexican Congress. It
is proposed to organize agricultural
colonies with state support and super-
vision in the states of Coahuila, Nue-
vo Leon, Chiapas, and Chihauhan.
The plan involves the development of
irrigation projects which already
have'been proposed by the depart-
ment of development and to comprise
conservation of natural resources.
Norris Bryant, '20, Returns Her
Among the former University stu-
dents recently dismissed from the
service and who returned last week,
was Norris M. Bryant, '20. He enlisted
last April in a medical unit attached
to an aero squadron and went over-
seas in July.
He was stationed in England at
several different flying schools. When
the armistice was signed he was sent
back to Hempstead, Long Island, and
was one of the few of his unit who
have been dismissed. Bryant will en-
ter the University at the beginning
of the second semester.
Army to Retain Unemployed Soldiers
Washington, Jan. 25-No soldier shall
be discharged from the United States
army until suh time as he can ob-
tain employment in civil life, accord-
ing to a new order of the war de-
partment. Commanding officers are
ordered to make it clear to their
men before demobilization that they
need not be discharged until they
have secured a position. Families
of married men remaining in the serv-
ice on account of unemployment
will still receive their regular allot-
ments.
Use The Daily to reach the students.
Four thousand students read it every
morning.-Adv.
clean with
i
Energine
No other process has its equ
Coal Bins Full
And PricesFall
Coal for Ann Arbor homes and in-
dustries promise to be more plenti-
ful than last year, according to Fuel
Administrator Junius E Beal. Dur-
ing the recent warm spell the dealers
have accumulated an adequate sup-
ply, though mostly of soft coal. Usu-
ally at this time of yeai', railroad
traffic is tied up by cold weather and
snow, making shipments slow and
uncertain. This season, however, the
favorable conditions have expedited
shipments and the supply bins are
well stocked.
This unusual condition has also had
much to do with the reduction of the
prices which have gone down 10
per cent on all grades. .
There has also been a reduction of
$1 a ton in the price of coke.
I
some Pocahontas will
--
U
r
Many users of hot air furn,
have been aided in the solution
their heating problems by infor
tion published by the governmen
pamiphlet form and distributed by
local fuel administrator. TI
pamphlets may be obtained from
Beal.
Committee Gets 80 New Membe
Eighty new memberships have I
obtained already by those solici
in the City Y. M. C. A. members
campaign. Enthusiasm for the me
ment has grown so that the commi
in charge has decided to extend
period for the work until Tues
evening, Jan. 28, at 6 o'clock.
a
Garment Cleaning
from West Virginia and Pen
nia about the first of Februar
will be an improvement ov(
grades of soft fuel that many
have been forced to use.
No shipments of hard coal are com- The Daily at your door every :
ing in yet, but it is expected that ing, $2.50 until June.-Adv.
We clean clothes
0
III
11
tom r
U
A Dynamic PAay of Thrill,' Suspense and Laughs, with
MARAVENE THOMPSON
i
44t .
CtE NINGR EIGReAinRG
CLEANING, PRESSING, REPAIRING
The Unusual Cast Includes
Kathleen McDonnell
Mrs. J. H.,Irvine
May Hopkins
Francis Byrne
Charles Dalton
Frank ]Elliott
Stephen Wright
Byron Beasley
Charles Milward
Frank Weston
Arthur Eldred
Billy Wattell
PHONE 2508
209 SOUTH 4TH AV
Adeline Amusement ~omp~ny Inc. pre~erms
-~ --~
........
.
t
_.' _ __ .. ------- .. .__ .... . .. -.as r . cf ......tea-..
The 'Shop For Men-
Just received shipment of
Imported English Caps
from
Cooksey & Co., London
A. M Donaldson
117N.UniversltyAve.
Adelne Ausemi h ompay Ic. present's
The Aposle of Happiness
1
i
r
I. f
A BKi MUSICAL FARCE
IN 3 FRIVOLOUS ACTS a
WITH AN ACCOMPANIMENT 2
OF EAUTIF-UL GIILS
NOVELTY- CLASS Book by VictrGabery
Music by rrcderickV' .Iowder
MIRTH - MELODY s e by Le'i Moron
Whitney Theatre, Tuesday, Jan. 28
WANTED
WANTED- -Farm in exchange for Ann
Arbor residence. Address E. W.,
care of Daily.
WANTED- A single room or suite
with two single beds, south of cam-
pus. Private family desired. Box
F.
.. MISCELLANEOUS
MISCELLANEOUS- Invest with the
with the Building and Savings Asso-
ciation. Dividends never less than
6 per cent. Exempt from taxation.
H. H. Herbst, Sec'y. Savings Bank
FOR RENT
FOR RENT - Front steam heated
rooms on State St. E. E. Calkins.
FOR RENT-Furnished 8 room house,
tint water heat, electricity, gas, bath,
hard wood floors, strictly modern,
niuar campus, from Feb. 1, to July 1.
Garage. Phone 806-J.
FOR RENT- All students read The toastmaster. The following men
Daily. The purpose of this column were initiated Dec. 19: Dr. H. Krae-
is to help you rent that room. mer, F. Case, A. K. Laukel, S. C.
LOST 4Zylstra, D. H. Phillips, W. H.
Graves, F. P. Zimmerli, and A. H.
LOST- Greek history note book at Robinson.
"Y" Inn Monday noon. Finder
nl ~ I 9Wnn 1(7- Rpward,'i Awav...-Daily serce--~nAlwa~vs
ptease pA.t7ne 14A1. nrwzafu.
xs wMjYa-s "L& assxavG- rsarraira.