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March 11, 2011 - Image 6

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6 - Friday, March 11, 2011

The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com

6 - Friday, March 11, 2011 The Michigan Daily - michigandalycom

A

Cage's latest movie from 3-D hell
'Drive Angry' is a and earned another nomination sucks. Blame for that lies at the trashy and charmingly over- of these, it takes old plot poi
for "Adaptation." feet of writer-director Patrick the-top, it could've been a Rob- and spins them as new inform
typical Nicholas Today, however, he's a punch- Lussier ("My Bloody Valentine") ert Rodriguez-style exploitation tion. We see Milton escapi
line associated with hack work and co-screenwriter Todd Farm- film, full of sex, explosions and from Hell in the film's openi
Cage crapfest like "The Wicker Man." We may er ("The Messengers"), whose car chases. Instead, it's a hor- minutes, but halfway throui

ints
a-
ing
ing
gh,

Wha
Nicolas
coming
incomp
Francis
Coppol
Godfatl
for th
need
ing), a
theren
been r
involve
due to
spite o
films h
an imp
tions. H
golden
mance

never know where it all went
By DAVID TAO wrong - it could've been the
DailyFilm Editor dozens of properties he fore-
closed on, his tax problems
t seems like forever ago, or the fact that he loves drop-
Cage was an up-and- ping money he doesn't have on
star. Sure, his uncle is the things he can't afford. Still, to
arable audiences, the fact remains that
Ford * Cage's latest films are phoned-in
a ("The paycheck jobs, which he takes to
her," Dre keep the IRS happy and himself
ose that out of prison. "Drive Angry 3D"
remind- AIl 3D is the latest stopgap between him
nd yes, At Quality16 and the slammer, and it certainly
say have and Rave fits the profile. Utterly devoid of
nepotism originality, plausibility and tech-
d - but Summit nical competence, the movie is
(or in quite possibly a career low for
if) Cage's presence, his Cage, which, considering his
ave clawed their way to recent filmography, is an accom-
ressive 24 Oscar nomina- plishment in and of itself.
le won one of those naked Then again, while it's Cage's
statues for his perfor- fault that the movie exists, it's
in "Leaving Las Vegas" not really his fault that the movie

screenplay seems like the work
of a disturbed middle school stu-
dent.
Cage's character, dubbed Mil-
ton in a lazy reference to "Para-
dise Lost," escapes from Hell
with a muscle car and a trunk
full of guns. He plans on rescu-
ing an infant from the clutches of
a Satanic cult led by Jonah King
(Billy Burke, "Twilight"), but
first, he gets drunk, shoots some
cops and bangs a cocktail wait-
ress, while Piper, another sexy
waitress (Amber Heard, "Never
Back Down") - who Milton res-
cues from an abusive domestic
relationship - listens in. Mean-
while, the Accountant (William
Fichtner, "Black Hawk Down"),
Hell's snarky bounty hunter,
stays hot on Milton's trail.
Actually, the premise sounds
entertaining - unabashedly

rendously shot mess of a movie,
lacking any trace of cinemat-
ic vision. The line delivery is
corny and unconvincing, grating
against the ear. The car chases
hinted at by the title are simply
wide shots of cars moving - no
cuts, no style, no anger. And with
the exception of the occasional
piece of debris hurled toward
the audience in slo-mo, the 3-D is
nowhere to be seen.
Submerged for the movie's
gruelingly long 104 minute run-
time in this septic tank of medi-
ocrity, audiences' minds will
wander toward the script, which
can't stand up to the scrutiny.
The Satanic story isn't just fan-
tastically stupid, it's full of holes,
which it tries to plug, unsuccess-
fully, by throwing surprise twist
after unbelievable surprise twist
at the audience. When it runs out

this is suddenly something new
for the audience to gawk at.
The film's one bright spot is
Fichtner's disappointingly short
turn as the Accountant. He fits
the mold of carefree badass
much more comfortably than
Cage. Impeccably dressed in
a suit and tie, he slams knives
through skulls with an emo-
tionless halfsmile, tortures the
mortally wounded in a steady
deadpan and, in one of the mov-
ie's funniest scenes, crashes a
tanker full of hydrogen fuel into
a police barricade while hum-
ming "That's the Way (I Like It)"
by KC and the Sunshine Band.
Sadly, his appearances are too
few and far between to counter-
act the tepid nature of the rest
of the movie, or the downward
gravitational pull of Cage's sink-
ing career.

HALL PASS
From Page 5
perfectly nails his role as the
token uncool father, as his
mechanical delivery borders
.on unnerving. Simply put,
the actor is at his best when
exuding the self-assured-
I'm-probably-stoned gait that
scored in "Zoolander" and
"The Royal Tenenbasums."
Fortunately, Sudeikis provides
adequate comic relief as the
clueless sidekick, believably
manifesting the borderline
bitter, average man's man title
bequeathed to Paul Rudd of
late.
Never mind that the titu-
lar "hall pass" desecrates and
trivializes the complexities
of human relationships - as
a gross-out flick, the expecta-
tion for emotional depth might
be misplaced. Even so, there
are fleeting serious moments
and moral epiphanies, but
these are such afterthoughts
that they become largely
unconvincing. The desire
is for belly-busting laughs,
which isn't met. How about a
"Kingpin 2?"

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Unbelievably spacious 4 bdrm apt. ina
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Large backyard & parking included!!
www.varsitymanagement.com
ARBOR PROPERTIES. DISTINC-
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Burns park. Now renting for fall. 734-
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AVAIL Sept.'11 1&2 Bdrm. fain.
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prkg,heat,& H20 incl. 734-904-6735
FREE SUBLET APT FINDER!!!
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APTS, SUBLETS & RMS For Rent
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AVAILABLE FALL! STUDIOS,
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Heat, water, and parking included.
Call Michigan Realty, 734-662-5500 or
for more info visit
www.michcomrealty.com

Tower Plaza Condominium
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Call Brian Tomsic
734-663-1530
!NORTH CAMPUS 1-2 Bdrm. !
Incl. Heat/Water/Parking.
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4 BDRM HOUSE as close to the
Medi-
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can get. Across from Fuller Field/Park
at 1010 Cedar Bend Drive. Garage,
washer/dryer, new carpet, A/C, large
common areas, big backyard. Avail
Fall 2011-12. Asking $2200 + Utilities.
Deinco Properties 734-323-6937.
4 BDRM HOUSE off Packard btw
McKinley and Sylvan at 827 Brook-
wood. 4 parking spaces, washer/dryer.
Tenants pay all utilities. Asking $2400
+ Utilities for Fall 2011-12.
Deinco Properties 734-323-6937.
4 BDRM BI-LEVEL house near
Kerrytown avail 6/29/11. 1.5 baths,
washer/dryer & covered porch.
734-274-6118
www.annarborapartments.net
APTS FOR FALL 2011-12!
Eff& 1 Bedrooms $675 - $1000; Most
units include Heat and Water. Most
have Parking available for $25/m.
Showings Scheduled M-F 12pm-4pm.
Cappo Mgmt 734-996-1991.
331 PACKARD: 1 very large room
available to rent w/shared kitchen &
bathroom. All utilities included!!
(734)668-1100
6 BDRM HOUSE + Bonus Room!
1608 Geddes. $3900 Updated! 3 Baths.
Free prkg & ldry. Dishwasher. A/C.
Call 734-678-0122.

cue.
19 Locations To Serve You
Studio - 4 Bedrooms
¬ĘCentra Campus ¬Ę Dowtown
r NorthCampus '> West Sde
Let Our Family Take Care of Yours!
Prvae Resident shnut a cotempoary Fniture
24 h anenanc taff Hih S ed ntemet
x cis Fc llties Study R-,
734.274.6118
www.annarbrapatmelnts.let
!!DON'T MISS OUT!!
BEST APTS. & LOCATIONS GO-
ING FAST
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761-8000
primesh.com
Call today to see your new Home!
Apartments Going Fast!
Efficiencies:
726 S. State-I Left
344 S. Division
1 Bedrooms:
726 S. State -1 Left
515 Lawrence-I Left
326 E. Madison
1000 Oakland-1 Left
520 Packard-I Left
511 E. Hoover
2 Bedrooms:
726 S. State-I Left
1021 Vaughn
721 S. Forest
411 High
819 Brown
*Fully Furnished Apartments
*Parking Included
*Free Ethernet
* Free heat and water
(* Atmost locations)
PIZZA THURSDAYS!!
NO-MONEY-DOWN LEASES.
Sign a lease on THURSDAYS and get
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PRICES. But hurry! Things are going
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CAMPUSREALTYCOM
? SOLD OUT ? Don't wait to hear
these words. Sign your lease today
for Best Selection, we SOLD OUT
early last year. NOW is the time to
secure your apartment home at Uni-
versity Towers 734-761-2680
www.universitytowers-mi.com
6 BDRM HOUSE across from IM
Building at 605 E. Hoover. 2 Bath-
rooms, 2 on-site parking, 3rd space
nearby, Washer/Dryer. Tenants Pay Al
Utilities. $3600 for Fall 2011-12.
Deinco Properties 734-323-6937.
! AVAILABLE FALL 2011, 7 bdrm,
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nished, parking x 8, low price/call Matt
248-535-1070
CLOSE TO U OF M
NORTH CAMPUS
AFFORDABLE RATES
ON SHUTTLE
BUS ROUTE

RELEASE DATE- Friday, March 11, 2011
Los Angeles Times Daily Crossword Puzzle
Edited by Rich Norris and Joyce Nichols Lewis
ACROSS 5 "In _ Speramus": 47 Recanted in 54Out
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42"Exodus"hero 41 Somemotel I R A A V E R T P E N N E
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grammar 44 Napoleonvessel? xwordeditor@aol.com 03/10/11
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4 It's as likely as not By DonnaS. Levi" 03/1111
(c)2011 Tribune Media Services, Inc.

AVAILABLE FALL! THREE Bed-
room house located near U/M Athletic
Campus and Band Field. Large
kitchen,
dining and living room. Beautiful
woodwork, screened in porch. Parking
and laundry. Call Michigan Realty,
734-662-5500 or for more info visit
www.michiganrealty.com
CAMPUS MANAGEMENT, INCin-
vites youbto visit www.CampusMgt.-
row, the best local website foe a wide
selection of apartments and houses. We
specialize in houses and apartments
very close to central campusAll are at-
tractively priced, most include parking,
many are furnished and some include
utilities. Contact us for details. Com-
plete listing for Fall 2011 available
now! Or call and speak with our Leas-
ing Consultant, Pat at 734-663-4101.
CLOSE TO B-SCHOOL
& LAW QUAD
917 Packard
Spacious 2 bdrm apts near central &
athletic campus. Updated kitchens
w/dishwashers, balconies, spacious liv-
ing rooms, & eat in kitchens. Fully
furnished, heat, water, & parking
included. Only two left!!
www.varsitymanagement.com
CORNER HOUSE APTS, next to
North Quad. 2 & 3 bdrms Spring and
Fall 2011. 734-274-6118
www.annarborapartments.net
! FOR GRAD STUDENTS ONLY !
Sterling 411 Lofts has limited spaces
left in grad-only apartments for 2011-
12. New building, 2 blocks from cam-
pus, walk to downtown. Rates from
$660, great views, elevators, HDTV,
10-ft ceilings, all utilities at flat rate.
Single bedrooms avail. 734-998-4400
www.4elevenlofts.com
!EXCELLENT 6-BR, 2 Bath colonial
on Central campus(1143 S.Forest Ave).
5 mins walk to college with 2 Refriger-
ators/Microwave/Toaster/Sink/Free
laundry/Private deck/Free parking.
(MAY 2011) Call 734 578 4625
WWW.800FULLER.COM
(734) 769-7520
1 & 2 bdrm., modern, clean, quiet
5 min. walk. Free Wi-Fi.
AVAILABLE FALL! FURNISHED
modern two bedroom apartments
located on Central Campus. Large
enough to accomodate up to 4 people.
Lots of amenities. Call Michigan Re-
alty, 734-662-5500 or for more info
www.michcomrealty.com
AVAILABLE FALL! FURNISHED
four bedroom duplex ina quiet neigh-
borhood on olden Avenue. Walk to
Football games and Krogers. Landlord
pays allutilities. Call Michigan
Realty,
743-662-5500 or for more info visit
www.michcomrealty.com

www.varsifymanagement.com
625 Church St. (734) 668-1100
One Bedrooms-On Campus
Best Locations in town
Fully furnished one bedroom apts
available for fall:
543 Church
911 S. Forest
801 W. Madison
917 Packard
521 Walnut
418 E. Washington
Apartments are renting fast! Call Varsity
to schedule your tourtodayl
GREAT CAMPUS APTS.!
608 Monroe - Behind S. Quad
Eff., Bi-level 1 and 2 Bdrm. apts.
Call Katie at 989.666.3164 or email
608MonroeManagers@umich.edu
815 S. State - Between Arbor & Hill
Lg. 2 Bdrm. apts (over 1100 sqft. each)
Call Adam at 248.904.5562 or email
815StateManagers@umich.edu
711 Arch - Between State & Packard
1 & 2 Bdrm. apts.
Call Phil at 734.662.5270
Call above numbers or email for
showings or please stop by!
**SEE WHY WE'RE STILL#1 IN
STUDENT HOUSING**UNIVER-
SITY TOWERS ON
CENTRAL CAMPUS.
UNIVERSITYTOWERS-Mi.COM
SAVE OVER $6000 PER YEAR!!
Why pay $1200 per month you can
pay $675 for your own bedroom ON
Central Campus! GRADS, FRESH-
MAN & PROFESSOR'S ARE
ALSO
WELCOME at University Towers.
734-761-2680
UniversityTowers-Mi.com
STUDIO - 4 BDRMS apts and houses
avail Spring & Fall 2011. 18 locations
to choose from. 734-274-6118
www.annarborapartments.net
**FOR MAY & FALL 2011 LEASE.
1,2,3 Bdrm apt. on campus.
www.jmsprop.com (734) 222-9033.

4

WORK ON MACKINAC Island -
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Front Desk, Bell Staff, Wait Staff,
Sales Clerks, Kitchen, Baristas. Hous-
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!!!BARTENDING!!! $300 /day poten-
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AGE 18+ OK. 800-965-6520 x 125.
ATTRACTIVE LADIES FOIL semi-
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For interview call: 734-678-4181 or
please email photos to:
georgedl@provide.net Principles
only.
COLLEGE PRO IS now hiring
painters all acrossthe state to work out-
doors with other students. Eamn
$3k-$5k. Advancement opportunities.
1-888-277-9787 or
www.collegepro.com
OFFICE ASSISTANT NEEDED part
time for property mgmt. co. for sum-
mer roughly 20-25 hrs/wk +/- basic du-
ties include phone, email, updating
websites, maintenance requests, ac-
counts receivable/payable and filing.
Pay based on experience. Email resume
to cappomanagement@gmail.com or
fax to 734-996-9929.
STUDENTPAYOUTS.COM
Paid survey takers needed in A2.
100% FREE to join. Click on Surveys.
RAISE FOR MAIZE! Start your ca-
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dents only, apply @ 734-763-8773 or
telefund.umich.edu

CONGRATULATIONS PHI
ALPHA KAPPA PLEDGES on
making it this far! Call 616-528-0454
for further instructions.
DEAR FELLOW ALUMNI: If you
are considering donating your old car
to charity, please consider donating it
to me. I have my BA from U-M, but I
am now finishing my MBA degree. I
can't afford to stay on campus, so I
must commute from Detroit to A2.
Someone stole my car and this left me
without transportation. Please consider
my situation as an alumni who is in
need of a car! Thank you foryor gen-
erosity and consideration. I can be
reached at (313)-247-9132 (lay and
evening).q

PRIVATE TUTORING FOR LSAT,
LAW SCHOOL, BAREXAM
My credentials:
- perfect 180 on LSAT
- Michigan Law graduate (3.85 GPA)
- licensed attorney
- 18 years of teaching experience
- hundreds of delighted students
734.996.2861 www.TESTGURUcom
THESIS EDITING- LANGUAGE,
organization, format. 25 yrs. U-M exp.
996-0566 or writeon@iserv.net

A D
VER
TISE
WITH
THE
CLASS
IFIEDS

4

mich student
housing.com

TELLERS: CREDIT UNION seeks
part-time Tellers for our Ann Arbor
and Chelsea locations. Please visit our
website at www.laketrust.org or e-mail
resumes to jobs@laketrust.org. EOE.

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