The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com
Wednesday, January 17, 2007 - 5A
A day in the life?
I'll pass, thanks.
F or four hours this past Sun- has seen in I8 years and enduring
day and Monday night, Jack roommates who demanded that I
Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland) watch the show, I've gotten sick of
kicked a lot of terrorist ass - or "24" without ever seeing it. It's not
something like that. In truth, I have that I don't think it's a good show
no idea what the "24" protagonist - I'm clearly in no position to say
did during his four hours of real- that - it's just that all the hype has
time, but I assume it had something shied me away. And don't confuse
to do with terrorists, and this with not taking to a
there may or may not show just because every-
have been some sort of one else does; my unwill-
nuclear/biological weap- ingness to watch "24" is far
on of mass destruction from rebellious. It's simply
hanging in the balance. because the masses have
In fact, outside of the worn me out.
hundreds of thousands _ I'm often told to watch
of "24" promos that Fox an episode or two, then
has forced down my MICHAEL decide if I want to watch
throat over the past six PASSMAN more. The problem is, at
years (yes, I'm keeping the moment I've already
track), I've never seen Jack Bauer made up my mind about "24"
kick any terrorist ass. - actually, Fox and my roommates
It may surprise you that a TV have. Going into season one with
columnist could be so oblivious anything less than a blank slate
to what's purportedly one of TV's would certainly affect my opinion
best dramas, but there's a valid - and that's not something I'm
reason. I do watch a lot of TV, willing to do.
more than most I suppose, but ESPN.com: Page 2's Bill Sim-
Kiefer Sutherland doesn't fit into mons has always said that tele-
any of it. vision needs to be consumed
When asked why I don't watch "organically." Basically, this
the show, I can never really come means that TV shows need to be
up with a sufficient answer, but it
usually comes back to one issue
I've always had with this show Jack Bauer and
that I've never actually seen. The
issue: a lack of information. '24': Real-time
Now, I know what you're think-
ing: "What the hell are you talking overkill.
about? '24' doesn't skip any details,
it's in fucking real time." First off,
calm down - there's no reason approached only when it seems
to use profanity. While "24" does appropriate and you have a desire
devote each season to an entire to watch.
day, what it fails to do is cover I couldn't agree more.If you're
the other 364 days a year of Jack coerced into watching a TV show,
Bauer's life. you're never going to approach
So, I propose to you "364," Fox's it with the open mind and time
newest crappy sitcom smash-hit. that it requires. Not once have I
It's a guaranteed home run. In the thought, "I should be watching '24'
vein of "Everybody Loves Ray- right now." That's never happened.
mond" and "The War At Home," So to dive into "24" just because
"364" would be the standard people tell me I should would
laugh-track-riddled mindless piece almost certainly result in me not
of crap that I so desire. The prima- appreciating Jack Bauer's terror-
ry cast would consist of Jack and ist-disposal techniques.
his immediate family, his parents Unlike a film that only requires
- who moved back from Florida watching 120 minutes of celluloid,
because of a quarrel his mother seriously taking in a TV series
had with a local flea-market ven- - especially a serial drama like
dor - and his drinking buddies, "24" - requires a deeper commit-
a group most likely composed of ment. If you don't like the first
his childhood best friend, a token few episodes, you'll bail on the
black guy and an unmarried co- series, won't know what the rest of
worker whom his wife despises. the season has to offer and judge
I'm guessing Donald Sutherland it unfairly. It's the equivalent of
("Pride & Prejudice") would star reading the first 30 pages of a 400-
as Jack's neurotic father who's page book and declaring it the
around the house way too much. worst book ever.
Actually, there's no way in hell So who knows, maybe in 10
I'd watch that - but if Fox wants years after the "24" phenomenon
me to produce it, I'm available. In has died down I'll give the show a
all seriousness, the real reason why chance. But to start watching now,
I don't watch "24" is the same rea- well, that just wouldn't be right.
son most people started watching
"24." After being bombarded with - Passman can be reached
more promos than "The Simpsons" at mpassoumich.edu.
A tale of 'Cowboys'
Not abad
'Knight'
SIMPLE MINDS MAKE
. FOR EASY LAUGHS
By IMRAN SYED
Daily Arts Writer
Every good sitcom has a goofball. Self-
absorbed, out of touch or just eccentric, it's
accepted that TV com-
edies - preferably awash * C**
in the frantic spurts of
outrageous antics - ben- The Knights
efit from simple charac- of Prosperity
ters who break down large Wednesdays
comedic themes to sim- at 9 p.m.
ple quips and quirks. For ABC
example, that last sentence
was pretty dense, but Kramer from "Seinfeld"
- king of goofballs - could easily convey the
same message with an overplayed, ironic gri-
mace. Perhaps he'd even throw in a slight gasp
and his patented full-body swerve.
But even if they're always sure to include
a goofball, most sitcoms won't chance it with
more than one - probably because the act can
easily become desperate if allowed even one
frame too many. So what can you say about a
show like "The Knights of Prosperity," which
features, more or less, an entire cast of goof-
balls? .Believe it or not, it fits nicely into the
show's premise; a few nobodies with their
heads in the clouds vow to take what life never
gave them - by robbing 63-year-old rock icon
Mick Jagger.
The ringleader of the Knights of Prosper-
ity is Eugene Gurkin (Donal Logue, "Blade"),
a janitor who's tired of paying his dues. Along
Courtesy of ABC
"Or maybe Billy Joel?"
with his janitor buddy Francis (Lenny Venito,
"War of the Worlds"), he recruits a handful of
local misfits and sets a plan in motion to break
into Jagger's New York City apartment to steal
whatever they need to make their dreams come
true.
Among the crew comprised entirely of
endearing incompetence: a hawkish cab driver,
an ex-Colombian militant-turned-waitress and
a gigantic Jewish supply warehouse security
guard. Of course, all reputable operations must
have an intern and the Knights have Louis, a
communications major who joins them after
being denied an internship at "The Montel
Williams Show." Bummer.
Though the Knights have a defined leader,
there isn't a central character to dominate the
plot. Instead, the story is a collaboration in
buffoonery - albeit orchestrated by ambitious,
scheming fools looking to accomplish a task so
inane and absurd it's impossible not to appreci-
ate their cunning attempt.
They go through the most convoluted proce-
dures imaginable to secure the key to Jagger's
luxe apartment, and in their simplicity assume
that a multi-million dollar facility is protected
by one simple lock. The last scene in the pilot
reveals how very wrong they are: Jagger's crib
is protected by fingerprint scanners, security
guards, metal detectors and a whole lot more
- all awaiting our bold, beloved Knights, who
will try that key very soon.
The light air that pervades every scene is
remarkable, considering this careless feel is
what all sitcoms shoot for but only rarely man-
age. As the audience, we love these people
because they're willing to try anything, yet
don't get hung up on anything. In the ingenious
absurdity of it all, should these guys fail, they'd
see no problem in saying, "Nice try guys, let's
do Donald Trump next."
"Knights" does lack an overall sense of pur-
pose, and while that plays well into its carefree
theme, it also takes away from its watchabil-
ity. There are many empty moments when the
show seems like nothing more than another
"Arrested Development" wannabe, but these
should get few and far between as the series
hits its stride. It'll take at least a season to get
into that department, but, driven by precise,
incisive writing and benefiting from the charm
of the ensemble cast, "Knights" should become
among the better sitcoms on television - and is
far and away ABC's best comedy.
A pleasantly deranged tale of murder
By JENNA PARKS Such olfactory mastery sets him
For the Daily apart from other mundane citizens
as he scours the city collecting new
With all the beauty of a period and exotic odors.
film set in 18th-century France, During his difficult youth work-
"Perfume: ing in a tannery, Grenouille stum-
The Story of a bles upon a beautiful maiden with
Murderer"has an equally appealing scent. After
much more to Perfume: his accidental murder of the girl, he
offer than just The Story of savors her waning scent and real-
looks alone. izes that he must never again let
The film is a a Murderer such a precious thing slip between
blend of gro- At the his fingers.
tesque images Michigan Theater Enter Dustin Hoffman ("I Heart
and a compel- DreamWorks Huckabees") as Giuseppe Baldini, a
ling story, not master perfumer far past his prime.
to mention an unprecedented Grenouille becomes his apprentice
onslaught of nasal close-ups. An in an attempt to learn how to pre-
adaptation of the best-selling novel serve the essences of objects, hope-
by German writer Patrick Siskind, fully even those of beautiful young
it rewards patient audiences with women. Grenouille's fine nose
its dark humor and visual mastery. creates even finer perfumes, and
Jean-Baptiste Grenouille (Ben Baldini is once again at the height
Whishaw, "Stoned") is born among of French fashion and celebrated
the filth and stench of Paris's fish among its most frou-frou social
markets to an ungrateful mother circles.
who discards him as easily as she When Grenouille discovers that
throws out a rotten catch. Soon what he desires is still beyond his
Grenouille lands in an orphanage reach, he leaves Baldini and sets off
and quickly displays his odd inborn for the perfume capital of France.
talent: an amazing sense of smell. The young man encounters anoth-
er strikingly scented redhead, the impressive is how he is able to hold
daughter of powerful businessman his own opposite such seasoned
Antoine Richis (Alan Rickman, veterans as Hoffman and Rick-
Professor Snape in the "Harry Pot- man. Though his resume is thin, he
ter" films). Grenouille believes he stands up to the challenge as well as
has found the object of his life's any other young Hollywood candi-
obsession and knows he must claim date. Whishaw sells the character
her powerful aroma. of Grenouille from his dirty nails to
Many women and many murders his overactive nose without over-
acting, no small feat for a role this
outlandish.
W hen the While the description of the
wonderful smells of the film are
olfactories govern tantalizing, there is obviously a lack
of actual olfactory satisfaction from
the mind. the film's two-dimensional world.
Instead, director Tom Tykwer
("Run, Lola, Run") fills the impos-
stand between Grenouille and his sible gap with beautiful scenery
desired prize, but the townspeople and intense visuals. Through the
soon discover a killer is among imagery that dominates the movie,
them. One of the most wanted men the odors, both pleasant and repul-
in France, Grenouille will stop at sive, come alive through the nose of
nothing to achieve the perverse Jean-Baptiste Grenouille.
pleasure he so badly desires. Though at times the sheer vul-
With chiseled movie-star garity and absurdity overpowers
looks planted awkwardly atop a the film's plot, the tidy ending is sat-
scarecrow frame, newcomer Ben isfying and precise. Not for the faint
Whishaw brings a kind of startling, of heart or those with weak stom-
tangible creepiness to the role of the achs, "Perfume" offers a splendid
murderer Jean-Baptiste. Even more aroma of romance, horror and art.
and their blow
By MICHAEL PASSMAN
Daily Arts Writer
Jon Pernell Roberts has a prob-
lem: He's got too much money and
nowhere to put
it. But that's ** Or
the kind of
occupational Cocaine
hazard a young Cowboys
entrepreneur In stores
runs into when next Tuesday
importing Magnolia
cocaine from
Columbia's Medellin cartel.
Roberts, a key player in Miami's
cocaine boom of the '70s and '80s,
immortalizes his roller-coaster
tale of drugs, blood and money in
"Cocaine Cowboys."
The film is not the first piece of
media to touch on Miami's coke-
fueled heyday (i.e. "Scarface,"
"Miami Vice" and gaming favorite
"Grand Theft Auto: Vice City").
But it's the first memorable docu-
mentary to delve into what actually
happened.
It opens with Roberts, girlfriend
Toni Muni and smuggler Mickey
Munday detailing how their opera-
tion began. Oftentimes Roberts and
Munday give conflicting accounts of
people and situations, with Roberts
holding the reasonable stance for
the most part. Munday comes off
as preoccupied but cool, dismiss-
ing almost everyone else as lucky
or dumb. He's also quick to point
out his success stories, like when
he towed a broken-down customs
boat to shore while giving the cus-
toms officers a ride back on his boat
- which was stocked with millions
of dollars
The fil
coverage
Griselda
fall. Eve
drug tra
overlookE
Mc]
MO
Per
lion beca
of Blanca
of Cuban
murder r
ishing th
worth of coke. not to think that many of the nega-
m hits its high point in its tive externalities that devastated
of"GodmotherofCocaine" the city could have been avoided
Blanco and Miami's down- if not for the greed and ruthless-
ryone's heard about the ness of a few. The film does a fine
fflicking, but what's often job of contrasting the earlier high
ed is how dark the situa- points of Miami's coke era with its
depressing aftermath, illustrating
how it shaped the Miami of today.
That said, the documentary's
faults are clear. The quick cuts
,untain '-vith coupled with the synth-dominated
soundtrack become distracting.
'uvian 'white. The subject matter is engaging
enough that the film's heavy styl-
ization isn't necessary.
"Cocaine Cowboys" isn't likely to
ame. With the emergence go down as the definitive documen-
and Castro's deportation tary about cocaine's rise and fall in
criminals to Miami, the Miami, but if nothing else, it should
ate skyrocketed. After fin- serve as a cautionary tale to ambi-
se documentary, it's hard tious Roberts wannabes.
I
WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 17, 7 PM
INTERNATIONAL CENTER, ROOM 9
for more information about the Peace Corps, visit
www.peacecorps.gov or call 312.353.4990
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