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148 - The Michigan Daily - Weekend, etc. Magazine - Thursday, January 10, 2002
w ek eetoiwho'sThursday ,January 10
why you need to e there ... Wednesday, January 16
The Michigan Daily - Weekend, etc. Magazine
The making of a mullet: A story of love an
Films opening
Gosford Park Come see the new film
from the master of the ensemble cast
picture; there would be no "Magnolia"
or "The Royal Tennenbaums" without
Robert Altman. At Showcase: 12:10,
3:30, 6:30, 9:20, 12:25 (Fri. and Sat.).
Orange County JB and Tom's son Colin
play stupid in this MTV "comedy" that
also resurrects Chevy Chase from the
cinematic graveyard: At Showcase:
12:20, 12:50, 2:30, 3:00, 4:40, 5:10,
6:45, 7:15, 9:15, 9:45, 11:20 (Fri. and
Sat.), 11:50 (Fri. and Sat.).
By Manish RaQIj
Daily Arts Writers
There is a dearth of mullets to be had in the fair city of
Ann Arbor. I looked. Oh yes, I looked.
The mullet population of Ann Arbor is either non-exis-
tent, in hiding or cleverly disguised by baseball caps or in
pony tails. I was able to find plenty of hippies - but that's
long in front, back and sides. And the hair tends to be
filthy, to boot.
No, I was looking for the crisp, clean, possibly greased
look of the classic mullet, that interesting convergence of
business and pleasure. There are few, no doubt, but the
mullet seems to have taken a serious fall from grace, at
least among the echelons of higher education.
And so, the decision was made. If I wanted to truly
understand the mullet, if I wanted to feel what a mullet
feels, if I wanted to live as a mullet lives, I had to become
a mullet.
It wasn't a decision worth taking lightly. Everyone
knows that a mullet is so much more than a hairstyle. It is,
in fact, a lifestyle. Was I willing to give up all that I held
sacred, all the societal mores that I had heretofore held so
dear? While appearaces do not in general make a man, the
presence of a mullet, I feared, would change the very per-
son that I am.
Films holding
Ali "I got in one bad fight and my mom
got scared and said you're moving in
with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air."
At Showcase: 12:40, 4:10, 8:00, 11:10
(Fri. and Sat.).
A Beautiful Mind If Russel Crowe wins
another Oscar, I am definitely never
going ,to the movies again. At
Showcase: 1:00, 1:30, 3:45, 4:15,
6:40, 7:10, 9:30, 10:00, 12:10 (Fri.
and Sat.).
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
When will this movie finally fly away on
the broomstick it rode in on? At
Showcase: 3:40, 6:50.
How High What?! No 4:20 showing! At
Showcase: 1:05, 5:15, 8:10, 10:25,
12:20 (Fri. and Sat.).
Impostor Hollywood has to stop making
films based on Phillip K. Dick novels.
They can only go downhill after "Total
Recall." At Showcase: 12:25, 2:45,
5:20, 7:50, 10:20, 12:15 (Fri. and
Sat.).
In the Bedroom Miramax has finally
released a film worthy of all the Oscar
advertising it provides; take that
"Chocolat"! At Showcase: 1:20, 4:05,
6:55, 9:55, 12:25 (Fri. and Sat.).
Jimmy Neutron Boy Genius Is this the
sequel to "Max Keebfle's Big Move"?
At Showcase: 12:00, 12:30, 2:40,
3:10, 4:45, 6:35.
Kate and Leopold A romantic comedy
with Meg Ryan, what clever casting! At
Showcase: 1:35, 4:50, 7:30, 10:05,
12:30 (Fri. and Sat.).
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of
the Ring "Rudy" and "The Good Son"
unite to fight the dark lord Sauron.
12:15, 12:45, 1:15, 4:00, 4:30, 5:00,
7:45, 8:15, 9:00, 11:15 (Fri. and Sat.).
The Majestic Carrey attempts drama
once again; Carrey's dramatic film
bombs once again. At Showcase: 8:30,
11:40 (Fri. and Sat.).
Monsters, Inc. Shrek can kick Sulley's
ass. At Showcase: 12:55, 2:55, 4:55,
7:00.
Not Another Teen Movie Anyone see
Jaime Pressly in Maxim? Man, she is
hot! 10:30, 12:40 (Fri. and Sat.).
Ocean's 11 Just as cool as "Out of
Sight", but "Out of Sight" takes place
in Detroit so it wins. At Showcase:
1:45, 4:20, 7:05, 9:10, 9:40, 11:30
(Fri. and Sat.), 12:00 (Fri. and Sat.).
The Royal Tenenbaums Owen Wilson
and Gene Hackman prove that they did
not lose all their acting ability in
"Behind Enemy Lines". At Showcase:
1:10, 4:25, 7:20, 9:50, 12:05 (Fri. and
Sat.).
The Shipping News Did you know that it
took triplet sisters to play the role of
Kevin Spacey's daughter in this film?
And not one of them can act. At
Showcase: 1:55, 5:05, 7:40, 10:10,
12:35 (Fri. and Sat.).
Vanilla Sky Go rent the far superior orig-
inal "Abre los Ojos" instead. At
Showcase: 1:25, 4:35, 7:25, 10:15.
Was I willing to forgo all that I held sacred, all in the
name of journalism? The decision was made - I am a
journalist first, fashionable member of society second.
THE CUTING OF THE MULLET
With firm resolve, I sauntered into Campus
Barber and Beauty Salon, located at 524 East
William Street. The first roadblock in the quest
for mulletude came in the form of a barber
who, adamently standing by her role as an
artiste de la tate, refused to cut a mullet.
"I'm anti-mullet," she proclaimed - clear-
ly taking the "Beauty" part of her institu-
tion's name very seriously. On one hand,
this discrimination against the mullet sad-
dened me, but I can't help but respect her unwillingness to
defame her own profession.
All was not lost, as my savior with scissors arrived in
the form of a Mr. Hickey, a knowledgeable barber who
was willing and able to cut the defamed mullet. The adven-
ture began.
As he cut lock after precious lock from the front of my
head (steering well clear, of course, from the back), we
chatted about the ins-ands-outs of the mullet. (I suspect
that he was being especially sure to occupy my mind -
even turning me away from the mirror for an extended
photo-op - in order to ensure that I did not break down
into tears while watching the destruction of my pride).
The politically correct term for the mullet is a bi-level,
as Mr. Hickey informed me. He also assured me that,
though it is not as popular as it was in the 1980s, the bi-
level is still asked for among certain circles of his clien-
telle. The friendly conversation sufficiently distracted me
from the snickers of the other patrons and, much tq my
chagrin, members of my own entourage. Within half an
hour, the
going Ar
mullet
undertake
I went
public. It'v
to the news
fered fron
my dual-
should ha
grown fut
myself ga
sort of att
the fourth
Needle
But the
brought i
even mor
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College. I
lower spo
dents? Is i
This is what a liberal education can do to a man
Courtesy o 'oucnstone Pictures
In the "Royal Tenenbaums," Gene Hackman apologizes for starring in "The Replacements."
Deconstructing, the timeless mullet
Today
CAMPUS CINEMA
Amelie So that is where they make good
romantic comedies, in France of all
places. State Theater. 7 & 9:15 p.m.
In the Bedroom Nick Nightingale from
"Eyes Wide Shut" directed this intense
portrait of grief. Michigan Theater. 6:30 &
9:30 p.m.
Intimacy Lots of nudity and lots of awards
won. State Theater. 7:15 & 9:30 p.m.
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of
the Ring Do they? Do they, Gandalf?
Michigan Theater. 7:30 p.m.
MUSIC
The Jackson Hustlers Jackson as in 5 or
as in prison, I'm scared either way. T.C.'s
Speakeasy, Ypsilanti, 10:30 p.m. $3 483-
4470.
Taj Mahal Slip and slide with this slide gui-
tarist. The Ark, 316 S. Main St., 8 p.m.
$35 761-1451.
Soulstice Finally a soul to squeeze, some-
one call Flea. Habitat Lounge, Weber's Inn
3050 Jackson Road 8:45 p.m. Free 665-
3636.
Stephan Genz, baritone German lyric bari-
tone Genz, one of Europe's most sought-
after lieder interpreters, performs the
works of Beethoven, Schubert, Schumann
and Wolf. 8 p.m. Mendelssohn Theatre.
$20-$35. 764-2538.
ALTERNATIVES
"People and Places: The Baker Gift of
20th-Century Photography" In memory of
U-M School of Architecture grad Morris D.
Baker, this exhibit features images of peo-
ple and landscapes from various 20th cen-
tury artists. UMMA, 525 S. State. Free.
764-0395.
"A Matter of Degree: Abstraction in
Twentieth Century Art" This exhibit fea-
tures 20th century works from the
UMMA's permanent collection that focus
es on abstraction in landscapes, objects
and figures. UMMA, 525 S. State. Free.
764-0395.
Friday
CAMPUS CINEMA
Amelle See Thursday. State Theater. 7 &
9:15 p.m.
Gosford Park Ryan Phillipe proves once
again that he is no Freddie Prinze, Jr.
Michigan Theater. 8 p.m.
In the Bedroom See Thursday. Michigan
Theater. 6:30 & 9:30 p.m.
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of.
the Ring See Thursday. State Theater. 6 &
9:30 p.m.
MUSIC
Donkey Punch CD Release They only
release after they punch so wear a hel-
met. The Blind Pig, 208 S. 1st St., 10
p.m. $5 ($7 under 21) 996-8555.
Al Jacquez Smooth R&B with cry baby
blues and some foot somping rock. Crazy
creative on the jazz six string. Zou Zou's,
Chelsea, 8 p.m. Free 433-4226.
Art Stephan No one can argue it's ART!
T.C.'s Speakeasy, Ypsilanti 6 p.m. Free
483-4470.
THEA TER
Rennie Harris Puremovement: "Rome &
Jewels" Combining themes explored in
"West Side Story" and the Baz Lurhmann
film, "Romeo + Juliet," this dance perfor-
mance recreates the classic Shakespeare
play with hip-hop choreography, rap and
Elizabethan language. 8 p.m. Power
Center. $18-36. 764-2538.
A LTERNA TIVES
"People and Places: The Baker Gift of
20th-Century Photography" See Thurs.
"A Matter of Degree: Abstraction In
twentieth Century Art" See Thurs.
Saturday
BOOKS
Craig Holden Reads Holden introduces
and signs his newest love story and crime
novel The Jazz Bird. 2pm, Nicola's Books,
2513 Jackson, free; 662-4110.
CAMPUS CINEMA
Amelle See Thursday. State Theater. 2,
4:30, 7:15 & 9:30 p.m.
Gosford Park See Friday. Michigan
Theater. 4, 7 & 10 p.m.
In the Bedroom See Thursday. Michigan
Theater. 3:30, 6:30 & 9:30 p.m.
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of
the Ring See Thursday. State Theater.
2:30, 7& 10:30 p.m.
MUSIC
Dranogah ws.g Presidio Chicago indie
group. The Blind Pig2O8 5. 1st St., 10
p.m. $5 ($7 under 21) 996-8555.
Demonsweat I wonder what kind of
deodorant this Danzig tribute band
requires. Elbow Room, Ypsilanti, 10 p.m.
$4 483-6374.
By Johann Hanik
Daily Arts Writer
"If all of human history were reduced to one episode of 'I Love
Lucy,' the mullet would not make its cameo until the placard reading 'A
Desilu Production' appeared on the screen," according to "Dr C.
Warren Fahy" in issue two of the Grand Royal Mullet Bonanza e-zine.
However, the mullet finds its roots in man's first civilizations. It is only
in recent history that the ebb and flow of mulletude has inspired the
pop-icon status of the 'business in front, party in back" 'do, but only
ethnocentric arrogance can be held responsible for the claim that the
mullet itself is a recent sensation.
The term "mullet" was coined by American author and wit Mark
Twain, who believed that the haircut resembled the mullet fish of the
Mugilidae family, order Perciformes. Twain makes the earliest known
literary reference to the mullet in his great-American novel
"Adventures of Huckleberry Finn," first published in 1885. In the pas-
sage, Tom Sawyer is allaying Huck's fears of being caught making mis-
chief by Aunt Polly. Tom assures him, "They're so confiding and mul-
let-headed they don't take notice of nothing at all."
Although Twain was responsible for coining the term, mullet pre-his-
tory extends back thousands of years earlier to the hairstyles of Hittite
warriors, circa 1500 B.C. The Moabites, a biblical tube, sported self-
imposed skullets during this time period. Paintings and statues in tombs
dated to approximately 700 B.C. have revealed that 800 years after the
Hittites and Moabites, the cradle of civilization still nourished mullet
fashion. Relics depict Ancient Egyptian officials sporting fashionable
mullet-wigs.
Flash forward 2,500 years to an inspired Mark Twain. As North
clashed with South during the Civil War, the mullet remained a staple
'Wetkend
Magazine
of the American cultural fabric on both sides of the Mason-Dixon line.
However, it took more than another century for the mullet cultural
explosion to enter the fashion runways and music charts.
Modern mullet history is a complex and rich discipline which space
constraints do not permit a full diatribe of here. Great mullet celebrities,
from Prince to Bono, dynamic-mullet duo Linda and Paul McCartney,
David Bowie and teen heartthrobs Mario Lopez and Ricky Martin have
all contributed their chapter to an incomparable volume of American
social history.
Empirical evidence shows that the overall mulletude of the American
population has experienced a sharp decline over the last decade, a
decline which can be traced back to George Bush Sr.'s unsuccessful vie
for reelection in 1992. It is interesting to note that at the very time John
"Uncle Jesse" Stamos of ABC's early '90s dream-team TGIF Friday
night lineup cut his mullet that the once unstoppable haircut fell expe-
rienced, ostracism and near-defeat. Draw your own conclusions.
While by the time 1995 rolled around it may have seemed as though
the mullet (or bi-level, as it is called in elite hairdressing circles) was
locked in its death throttles, the dawn of the 21st century has seen a
resurgence of mullet culture, obsession and pride. Though not neces-
sarily in that order.
However, since their recession from the public eye and beauty shop,
mullets and the people who love them have become the objects of
ridicule, degradation and violence. This summer the Tory candidate for
British Prime Minister, John Prescott, threw punches at a mullet-head-
ed protestor who himself had thrown only an egg.
Ann Arbor, a community with a reputation of progressiveness and
tolerance, has itself succombed to the easy evil of mullet bashing. T-
shirts bearing the caveat "Fear the Mullet" have made their way into the
display windows of local merchants - and even the University com-
Business in front, party in t
munity.
Mullets have featured in
Wesley Willis ("Cut the Mu
Perhaps the essence of the m
poignantly than by the pen o
O squi
Ye
Weekend, etc. editors: Matt Grandstaff, Jane Krull
Writers:Jeff Dickerson, Keith N. Dusenburry, Johanna Ilanink, Lyle Henretty, Mat
Manish Raiji, Luke Smith, Andy Taylor-Fabe, Josh Wickerham.
Photo Editors: David Katz
Photographer: David Katz, Leslie Ward, Alyssa Wood.
Cover Photo: Leslie Ward
Arts Editors: Lyle Henretty and Luke Smith, Managing Editors, Jeff Dickerson, Assc
Editor in Chief: Geoffrey Gagnon
Phone Numbers: Michigan Theater: 668-8397; Quality 16: 827-2837; Showcase: 973-8380;
State: 761-8667.
Showtimes are effective Friday through Thursday. Matinee times at State Theater are
effective for Saturday and Sunday only.
r