16B - The Michigan Daily Weeken Magazine - Thursday, March 20, 1997
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KOKO
Continued from Page 48
BL: 'Cause you gotta do somethin' to
me now.
Koko: What you want me to do to
you?
BL: Get real creative now.
This comment was designed to
prompt Koko to come up with conver-
sation much more stimulating than
what she'd thus far been saying.
Perhaps, she could say something more
appropos to the 976 number at which
she worked, instead of re-creating the
duller %,enes of "Girl 6."
Koko: Ooh.
BL: What are you doin'?
Koko: Right now I'm playing with
myself. Kinda hard to think when
you're playing with yourself.
BL: Yeah, you can get distracted eas-
ily. Are you getting wet?
Koko: Very. It's hard to concentrate.
Wanting now to instruct her in the art
of talking dirty, I felt like screaming
critical sarcasm like, "Oh, that's much
more creative, Koko. And how deeply
philosophical, too!"
Koko: OK. Imagine I'm riding you.
BL: Oh yeah.
Koko: Hey, I'm not riding you for-
ward - I'm riding you backward!
Now, Koko, I'm almost positive I
didn't call this phone sex line to be
chastized for getting into the groove of
a certain sexual position, even if it isn't
what you had in mind. With my tail
between my legs, however, I continued.
BL: Mmm. So, where are you from?
I'm not sure why, but I felt compelled
at this point to learn more about my
partner in this safest possible incarna-
tion of carnal pleasure.
Koko: Fort Lauderdale.
BL: Is it hot down there?
Koko: Very. It puts you in heat too
much; like animals.
BL: What do you look like?
Koko: Well, I'm 5'5'. I have long
black hair, blue eyes, 125 pounds and
size 42 DD bra.
BL: Let's do something different
now.
Koko: What about you, what do you
want to do?
BL: Let's do it doggy style!
Koko: Now we're talkin'.
BL: Uhh. That's.
good. Mmm, we've;
got to hold it. Ahh,>
ohh, I'm going
faster - as fast
as I can. Like a
racehorse, baby.g
Oh yeah!'
It's quite pathetic
that I was actually=
beginning to become more
creative than Koko. People who
have heard the tape of our conversation
have even begun to comment that I
should consider pursuing the dramatic
arts by way of AT & T and Hustler as a
career.
Koko: Ahh, don't stop, don't stop.
BL: Keep goin'. Keep goin'.
Having never faked an orgasm
before, I figured that a good, long growl
would do the trick. That assuredly
would be the point where my extensive
expertise of porn films actually became
useful.
BL: Mmm, ohhh! Thank you, baby.
That was great.
Koko: You're very much welcome.
BL: Oh, you're the best.
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Koko: I know.
Adhering to every
phone sex stereotype
you've ever heard,
wholly unfulfilling and
seemingly preoccupied
with food, the Koko
experience was some-
what less than the best,
though truly informa-
tive and quite enjoy-
able, even if she was
roughly as satisfying as a
pager on vibrate and about as
sensually creative as 2 Live Crew
lyrics.
However, Koko did pop my erotic
telecommunications cherry and for that
I am grateful. Thank you 42 DD wear-
ing, blue-eyed Koko from Ft.
Lauderdale - but bone up on your
Penthouse Forum reading before I call
back.
V
gn
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