16B - The Michigan Daily Weeken Magazine - Thursday, March 20, 1997 9 0 r _ _0 > KOKO Continued from Page 48 BL: 'Cause you gotta do somethin' to me now. Koko: What you want me to do to you? BL: Get real creative now. This comment was designed to prompt Koko to come up with conver- sation much more stimulating than what she'd thus far been saying. Perhaps, she could say something more appropos to the 976 number at which she worked, instead of re-creating the duller %,enes of "Girl 6." Koko: Ooh. BL: What are you doin'? Koko: Right now I'm playing with myself. Kinda hard to think when you're playing with yourself. BL: Yeah, you can get distracted eas- ily. Are you getting wet? Koko: Very. It's hard to concentrate. Wanting now to instruct her in the art of talking dirty, I felt like screaming critical sarcasm like, "Oh, that's much more creative, Koko. And how deeply philosophical, too!" Koko: OK. Imagine I'm riding you. BL: Oh yeah. Koko: Hey, I'm not riding you for- ward - I'm riding you backward! Now, Koko, I'm almost positive I didn't call this phone sex line to be chastized for getting into the groove of a certain sexual position, even if it isn't what you had in mind. With my tail between my legs, however, I continued. BL: Mmm. So, where are you from? I'm not sure why, but I felt compelled at this point to learn more about my partner in this safest possible incarna- tion of carnal pleasure. Koko: Fort Lauderdale. BL: Is it hot down there? Koko: Very. It puts you in heat too much; like animals. BL: What do you look like? Koko: Well, I'm 5'5'. I have long black hair, blue eyes, 125 pounds and size 42 DD bra. BL: Let's do something different now. Koko: What about you, what do you want to do? BL: Let's do it doggy style! Koko: Now we're talkin'. BL: Uhh. That's. good. Mmm, we've; got to hold it. Ahh,> ohh, I'm going faster - as fast as I can. Like a racehorse, baby.g Oh yeah!' It's quite pathetic that I was actually= beginning to become more creative than Koko. People who have heard the tape of our conversation have even begun to comment that I should consider pursuing the dramatic arts by way of AT & T and Hustler as a career. Koko: Ahh, don't stop, don't stop. BL: Keep goin'. Keep goin'. Having never faked an orgasm before, I figured that a good, long growl would do the trick. That assuredly would be the point where my extensive expertise of porn films actually became useful. BL: Mmm, ohhh! Thank you, baby. That was great. Koko: You're very much welcome. BL: Oh, you're the best. ">:. - . .r. ' s ' <',,, ^; . ; , ' -r f I Koko: I know. Adhering to every phone sex stereotype you've ever heard, wholly unfulfilling and seemingly preoccupied with food, the Koko experience was some- what less than the best, though truly informa- tive and quite enjoy- able, even if she was roughly as satisfying as a pager on vibrate and about as sensually creative as 2 Live Crew lyrics. However, Koko did pop my erotic telecommunications cherry and for that I am grateful. Thank you 42 DD wear- ing, blue-eyed Koko from Ft. Lauderdale - but bone up on your Penthouse Forum reading before I call back. V gn If you L design, designe ire majoring ir ? graphic then apply to work as a r for The Michigan Daily Advertising Production Department. Positions are for fall and spring/summer ' -1997 Applications due / Friday, March 23 Call 764-0556, and ask for Susan or Lissa to get more information. LL C 5 Mar. 21 Wally Pleasant Minefield Hopscotch Mar. 28 South Normal U Mar. 20 Eric, Steve, & Co. Dan Shere Mar. 27 6 String In-the-Round Chris Buhalis Brian Lilie K.C. Groves Jim Roll ,.-: , ,. f' ' Lower level of the Michigan League 911 N. University Ann Arbor 48109-1265 For more information, please call 763-4652. Sponsored by Michigan League Programming: A Division of Student Affairs (/ook afhk .. my n mnm.