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ARTS
The Michigan Daily
Friday, April 5, 1985
Page 6
'The Slugger's Wife'
14
...out on strikes
By Joshua Bilmes
Every other review in the world set
forth the simple, undeniable fact
that Neil Simon's The Slugger's Wife is
not funny. I concur. The film stinks.
The best line is "Screw one for the
moose," and what is a line like that
doing in a Neil Simon movie? Police
Academy II was far funnier and in
much better taste, though that is not the
worst sin of The Slugger's Wife.
Michael O'Keefe stars as Darryl Por-
ter, a slugger for the Atlanta Braves.
He becomes fixated with a rock singer
named Debby Palmer (Rebecca De
Mornay). They marry and Darryl goes
on a torrid hitting streak, hitting
homers for Debby, and, of course, the
Braves are in the thick of the pennant
race. And then Debby leaves, beginning
to tire of having to yield her career op-
portunities to Darryl's. Darryl sub-
sequently falls apart at the plate.
This is when the film's wretched
morality starts to really come into play.
The Braves' manager has a player
(Moose) hire three girls for Darryl's
pleasure. The manager persuades a
vague Debby look-a-like to go to
Darryl's bedside after he is hit by a pit-
ch during batting practice and suf-
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rte.
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presents
fering from blurry vision to tell him she
will be back when the season is over. It
works-Darryl comes to life, breaking
Roger Maris' home run record. Do the
Braves win the pennant? Who cares?!
The difference between a baseball
manager and a pimp, according to The
Slugger's Wife is that the former would
only supply girls for the team's slum-
ping players, while the latter would get
them for everyone, including front-
office personnel.
And then when one takes into account
that the film just is not funny, you have
a bad moviegoing experience,
especially when the writer is Neil
Simon, who usually writes funny
comedies that the whole family can en-
joy. Perplexingly enough, the director
is Hal Ashby of Harold and Maude and
Coming Home fame.
Part of the problem seems to be that
the filmmakers are relying on the
music to sell the move. Quincy Jones
was hired to pick nice songs for Rebec-
ca de Mornay to sing, and so the film is
filled with musical numbers like "Little
Red Corvette," although they have no
relevance to the film. The numbers are
done in a style that reminded me of the
Hardy Boys TV show.
The Slugger's Wife is totally devoid of
charm. I dislike having to dislike a film
this much, but I haven't much of a
choice. The Slugger's Wife is a bases-
loaded strikeout.
March of Dimes
BIRTH DEFECTS FOUNDATION
SAVES BABIES
HELP FIGHT
BIRTH DEFECTS
KER ASOTES THEATRES
MOVIE DIRECTORY
WAYSIDE 1 & 2
3020 Washtenaw Ave Ypsilanti, 434-1782
BABY
fri., 5,7, 9
Sat., Sun. 1. 3, 5, 7. 9
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Fri 445705 925
Sat Sun 130400,6:50, 9:20
CAMPUS THEATRE
1214 S. University - Phone 668-6416
RETURN OF THE JEDI
Fri. 4:30, 7;00, 9:30
Sat , Sun. 2:00, 4:30, 7:00, 9:30
STATET1-2-3-4
LOCATED IN THE HEART OF A' THEATRE DISTRICT
231 S. State - Phone 662-6264
TICKETS ON SALE 30 MIN. BEFORE SHOW TIME
BREAKFAST CLUB
Fri. 5:25, 7:30,9:35
Sat., Sun110320525730, 935
FRIDAY, THE 13th, PART 5
Fri. 5:25, 7:30, 9:35
Sat. 110, 320, 525, 935
Sun. 1:10,3:20, 5:25,7:30 9:35
BLOOD SIMPLE
(Sneak Preview)
Sat. Night 7:30
THE SURE THING
Fri 5:20, 7:25, 9:30
Sat., Sun. 1:05, 3:15, 5:20, 7:25, 9:30
HE MAN
Fri. 5:15, 7:20, 9:30
Sat Sun. 1:00, 3:10, 5:1 57:20. 930
LATE SHOWS AT STATE
DOORS OPEN AT 11:45
ALL SHOWS START AT 12:00-ALL SEATS $2.00
1. THE LONG "GOOD FRIDAY"
2. THE SURE THING
3. FRIDAY THE 13th, PART 5
4. BREAKFAST CLUB
;4
Eric Clapton-Behind the Sun
(Warner Bros.)
The worst thing about Eric Clapton's
latest album is that it's hard to care.
Behind the Sun is a marriage in the
grand tradition of royal betrothals-the
perfect combination of anemic
qualities from both families producing
a polished but utterly bland child.
Behind the Sun is a child of Clapton
and producer Phil Collins (who was
asked to step aside when the project
was almost finished so that veterans
Ted Templeman and Lenny Waronker
could try to salvage something) born
into a world that remembers Clapton
for his days in Cream and Collins for
whatever was heard on the radio that
morning.
It isn't so much that the album is bad,
just that there isn't anything to it. Clap-
ton is a blues guitarist, his very nature
casts him in a rough bluesy setting.
Collins on the other hand is a pop
craftsman. He takes sounds and cleans
them up-witness what he did to "You
Can't Hurry Love."
Like a square peg being ground into
Collin's round musical hole, Clapton's
music loses its edge and then doesn't fill
all the space it needs to.
There are some good ideas for songs,
on the album. "Forever Man" and "See
What Love Can Do" are just a couple of
the songs that suggest they might have
been appropriately expanded on in
another context (perhaps Clapton's last
album Money and Cigarettes). Here,
however, they go nothwere.
Clapton may still have some good
ideastleft in him but he won'
by turning to slick p
techniques. Money and4
promised a rejuvenate
crusading at middle rota
across AOR stations to pro
t find them the cute title and overslick packaging
production image can go straight there too. But
Cigarettes this confident, suspiciously well-
d Clapton groomed sounding debut LP is sur-
tion speed prisingly pretty good; it entrenches
ye that the those hooks in your head even as grim
imagesof MTV and teen mag success
flash across the brain.
With their big hair and glossy big-
money wave/funk dance sound, L.A.'s
Bang Bang seems like a canny
Stateside attempt to repeat the success
formula of Duran Duran. That remark
probably has most of you already tur-
ning the page but, hey, 1. integrity has
been dead anyway since the day people
started calling any degree of political
activism "reminiscent of the '60's;" 2.
what's sp terrible about Duran Duran in
the first place? (they never claimed to
be anything but a singles/video band,
and are they really any more packaged
at this point than, say, Bruce
Springsteen or Tina Turner?); and 3.
Bang Bang do a decent enough job of it
without sounding like carbon D-D
copies.
The range is moderately wide, from
rockier AOR ("Rodeo") to more expec-
ted soon-to-be-a-12-inch-near-you dance
ne ~cuts ( "Fallen'Leaves," "The A.rtt of
context of Emotion"). The album is cozily chart-
un though, oriented throughout. Funky bass under-
usings of a tones, variously bar buried and
prominent guitars, lots of synth back-
drops, predictable but well-employed
Ph Kraus frills like horn sections and girl singers,
et al.
Part II Catchy-as-all-Hades songs include
"Fallen Leaves" (ABC without the ex-
cess melodrama), "This is Love"
(Haircut 100-esque teenstuff with a tad
y hell, and more meat), "Religious Holiday" (U2
goes frilly-populist) and the title song
(troublesome-whiteboy funk, tension
rumbling under layers of production
slick).
At the end of the road is a sur-
prisingly disarming waltz-tempo
ballad, "Dark Intentions," on which
Julian Raymond's initially agreeable
and later tiresomely rough vocals
reveal an unexpected crooner's war-
mth. A very charming end to a not at all
bad record.
The master Blasters
Slash recording artists the Blasters have made the long trip from Los Angeles to Detroit in order to bring their brand of
"American Music" to Harpo's. The Blasters have received critical acclaim for their ability to blend Rockabilly, Blues,
Country, and the kitchen sink. Tickets are available at Ticket-world outlets and the door, which will open at 8 p.m.
Records-
{1
tI
Clap ton
... blues edges gon
blues are viable in the
today's pop. Behind the S
sounds painfully like the m
washed up pop star.
-Josep
Bang Bang-Life
(Epic/CBS)
Commercial as all bloody
L
A
I
ana al Loutlets. Call 763-TKTS. ,
I
U
AMTRAK'S
NEW FARES
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Chicago $41.00* $21.50
Battle Creek $14.25*1 $ 7.50
*Peak fares are only effective between
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ARETHE
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