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OPINION
Page 4
Friday, January 6, 1984
The Michigan Daily
Cupiditas,
Caritas at the
University
By Mike Buhler
On a recent wintry morning, the
Morning Crew was playing the John
Couger classic, "I Neeed a Lover Who
Won't Drive Me Crazy." On my 3rd
Lewis hall freshman year, we used to
play that constantly - and for the wor-
ds. Of course, we would have been
satisfied with the quickie version, "I
Need a Lover."
In the early hours of the day, the
mind can be very playful, and as one
thing leads to another, I was soon con-
sidering the new Yes song containing
the line, "Owner of a lonely heart/Much
better than the owner of a broken
heart." How much truth is in that
thought?
AS FRESHMEN, we were hardly
broken-hearted. Rather, there were
only discussions at Tuesday's dinner as
to who should be the following
weekend's date. And, generally, there
would be a new one every week. Same
pattern as high school. An opportunity
to play the field.
Some guys had girlfriends at home or
other schools, and a few fortunate ones
came to the University with sweethear-
ts. Some of us even went back to old
girlfriends for a time. In search of a
sane lover, some will pursue endless
paths. Others will give up totally, and
the remainder, love-struck, will suffer
the slings and arrows Cupid has to of-
fer.
There are two kinds of love: There is
Caritas, the true love of the heart for
which we all strive, and the physical
desire of Cupiditas, which is what the 3rd
Lewis theme song was about. Enter the
Yes theme.
MOST OF US have been raised with
the notion that it is better to have tried
and failed, than to not have tried at all.
Unless you are Northwestern. But even
they, and Minnesota, try. Talk about
broken hearts! These football players
could avoid dejection if they enter the
game with the feeling that a loss won't
matter, i.e. they can't win anyway. So
when all is said and done (there is no
political link here), they leave the game
bruised, but unscathed.
And the same can be true in love. This
football attitude is much like Cupiditas:
enter the game, and leave bruised but
unscathed at the relationship's end. But
to enjoy Caritas - and even find - love
can no longer be treated like a game.
YOU HAVE to open yourself up, and
be vulnerable to hurt. Ready to accept a
broken heart at the termination of an
affair. And this is what the Yes song is
about, over the Couger philosophy. If
opened up, and the relationship ter-
minated, the holder's heart breaks
apart. Another new owner of a broken
heart joins the world. And will he be
more careful next time? Not take as
many risks? Just seek Cupiditas?
Hopefully not.
Because Yes is wrong. A lonely heart
may not suffer as many palpitations as
a broken one, but that certainly does
not make it more sound or better.
Because a lonely heart has not ventured
anywhere. It has not been to the Arb,
Barton Pond, or shared any other quiet
moment with a lover. A lonely heart
only listens to Segar's "Horizontal
Bop." And takes a date party-hopping
from one kegger to another.
The owner of a lonely heart has a
depleated emotional bank, while that
owner of a broken heart has only lost on
a loan (enter Jackson Browne's "Call it
a Loan"). But only the owner of the
lonely heart can take such a callous
view of love, and see it as a financial
transaction.
Economically, who can deny that the
owner of the lonely heart is not richer?
Yes, of course, gets rich either way. But
consider the savings of not having to en-
tertain a steady companion lavishly.
Keg parties - especially when thrown
by others - are not too expensive. Even
a movie at MLB can make a bigger dent
for two. But the real savings comes at
gift-giving times- Chanukah or
Christmas, Valentine's Day, and May
Day (you're supposed to send flowers).
These all fall within the realm of the
University calendar. And any cheap-
skate knows that if you want to keep
your money, don't date at these select
times. Which keeps any Scrooge lonely,
because the intervals are not very long.
Still, there is no point in just throwing
money around, making worthless in-
vestments. Unless you are willing to
assume the risk. Because a well-
courted love can prove fruitful. And if it
doesn't, hasn't something been lear-
ned? Education does have its price.
So I leave it to you, which is better?To
have a lonely heart or a broken heart?
For me, that is not at issue. I'm still
working on the "won't drive me crazy"
part.
Buhler is a regular contributor to
the Opinion page.
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4
4
Jonn Couger sings a lot about love. But whichkind does he favor, Caritas or
Cupiditas? Which is more healthy? And which is more fun?
Gbr fihilgan ai1Q
Edited and managed by students at The University of Michigan
Vol. XCIV-No. 79
420 Maynard St.
Ann Arbor, MI 48109
Stewart
CIVIL. LIBERTY NO
L.ONGER EXISTS IN
EL. $ALVA- ORm
Editorials represent a majority opinion of the Daily's Editorial Board
TME SOVIET UNION
HAS BANNED A.L.
CIVIL LIaRTIES
FOR YeAS,
\ '
5L. SALVADOR IS
RUN BY A BAND
OF RUTHLESS
MILITARISTIC
PICTATORS m
The Grind revisited
T ODAY IS THE day after. The day
after the first day of winter classes
in 1984. And for students trickling back
into town this means that one ominoust
situation that will soon devour all a
student's time has just set in.
The Grind.
For most students the Grind hit even
before the first day of classes in Ann
Arbor. Car tires slipping around in the
slush that was left behind by holiday
snowstorms caused car owners to
grind their teeth in frustration as they
tried to get themselves out of the mess.
Students returning to town slid over
stuffed suitcases, through the slush-
pools, and up to their dorm rooms.
They return to shriveled spider plants
and broken pipes - casualties of the
winter chill which swept through Ann
Arbor and the rest of the nation. Some
students found they had no dorm room
at all to return to and had to camp out
in residence hall lounges.
Meanwhile, machine-like employees
of student bookstores loaded copies of
the paperback Russian novel Dead
Souls and civil engineering textbooks
onto shelves preparing for the book
rush.
And then students flocked to the
bookstores, trickling in slowly at first,
madly pushing ,and shoving while
searching for a pamphlet on conflict
resolution and the politics of peace.
Then waiting in line with a charge card
tfor several hoursi possibly:to find out
that their card expired the day before.
Then loosing control when they find
that something like a 60-page pam-
phlet cost $12, without tax.
A day's bookhunting might reveal
that around twelve books are required
reading (not including the optional
ones) for a single English class. What
kind of toll will this special class take
on the student's financial accounts?
Why, nearly $200 for one class. This is
probably more than most students
spent for Christmas gifts for loved
ones. Or try those chemistry and
physics texts. An education does not
come cheap.
Yes, the Grind is once again upon us.
But there is some consolation if, like
many at the University, you feel that
the executioner (a University
professor) has sharpened his axe and
is drooling with pleasure to see you
launch into that 8-page syllabus and 3-
inch, 1,000-page course pack as he tells
you not to fall behind in the reading.
The official countdown, according to
the 1984 calendar, shows that there are
only 104 days until the end of classes
and Armageddon (final exams week).
THEI USSR IS
RUN 8Y A SAND
OF MILITARISTIC
RUTHLESS
DICTATORS
BoCAUSE Tie
SOVIET UNION IS
PERPETUATING
AN IMMORAL.
SYSTEM i
DEATH SQUADS AR THE SAM.. SO IF WI
KILLING TIOUSAN S THINGS HAVE SUPPORT E..
OF CIVILIANS, IGNOR- GONE ON IN SALVADOR THAN
ING ALL. UMAN TE USSR WHY DON'T V.E
RIGHTS, THEREBY FOR DECADeS, SUPPORT THE
SNUFFING DUMO- \ SOVIET UNiON ?
CRACY,
C \
\../'
;
LETTERS TO THE DAILY:
Printing ofpolice sketch racist'
4
Tothe Daily:
The printing of a police sketch
(Police seek man in Faber
killing," Daily, December 8) of
the black man "wanted for
questioning" in the death of Nan-
cy Faber is an outrageous, racist
act.
One need not be familiar with
the reams of research on witness
unreliability, nor with the fact
that in "free" America black
Daily 's amateur hour
" .,
._.,
' vaw
R
' K
t ,"
" J "t
. ._ .Ply
males are routinely sought by
police in conjunction with un-
solved. murders of whites in
largely white towns to question
the police action and the, Daily's
article.
Just a little common sense
should make highly suspect any
detailed facial description given
two weeks after the fact by
someone driving a car at night at
about 30 miles per hour on a
poorly-lit road. If all this sounds
more like Biloxi, Mississippi, it is
only necessary to add that the
frequent newspaper articles and
rewards already totalling nearly
$15,000 give off the stench of an
attempt to whip up an arrest and
conviction.
No one can help but feel anger
and sorrow about this apparently
random murder. Yet, murders
without many clues nor
resolution arenot that uncom-
mon around here, and rarely
generate a reward fund. I cannot
help but wonder if the special
treatment given this case is
nothing but one of the privileges
that goes with being closely
associated with the white-
dominated business class of
'liberal' Ann Arbor.
- Gene Goldenfeld
December 10
by Berke Breathed
//
To the Daily:
Congratulations on continuing to
display your amateur jour-
nalistic qualities. Once again you
have taken a cheap shot at my
Fraternity in your ever present
desire to mock the Greek system.
While Ron Pollack's "The last
phone call to mom while cram-
ming for exams" (Daily, Decem-
ber 8) was intended to be light
and humorous, he instead used
the opportunity to call Sammies'
little sisters airheads, "girls who
aren't too smart." I found it
inappropriate and distasteful.
The Daily insists on imposing
its predisposed judgements on its
readers, continually degrading
the University's fraternities and
sororities. Last week the Daily
continued its duty by calling
Theta Chi racist for having a
Daily wishes to ridicule the girls I
sometimes associate with. You've
nailed my fraternity brothers and
my friends, so how about an ar-
ticle next week cutting down my
mother?
- Joel Herman
December 8
BLOOM COUNTY
4
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