Sundcy, January 18, 1976
THE MICHIGAN DAILY
The downhill struggle
By LOIS JOSIMOVICH country equipment crawling up has the consistency of vId also sniggering, called theai off I had just started getting into I'm just big on creative snow
a bank on his hands and knees. epoxy glue and, in my opinion, the trail-probably afraid I d harmony with the slope wnen design."
j EARNING TO ski cross-coun- I reassured myself-maybe he was invented by the Marquis de run over them, it suddenly got a little steeper. I
try is something like learn- was looking for a contact lens. Sade. was faster than a speeding bul- AFTER THAT I decided it
ing to cook. Even with all the Two women skiers emerged QLITHER, SLITHER aither. let-but alas, unable to leap wouldn't do much gad to
ingredients, you might end up from around a curve in the You're supposed to wait about I won't call them steps. If small shrubs in a single bo'iad. keep going downhill. The only
burning your hot cross buns. path. half an hour after putting the cross-country skiing is an ex- So with skis crossed under me, way I could stop besides falling
I discovered this recently "What color wax are you j- wax on before you start skiing tended walk, then evolution I plunged headlong into a ;was to keep going until I fell
while making my mark on the today?" I asked ha so it can get acclimatized to the must have passed me by. Esven neighborly bush. into the Huron River. I had a
white stuff. It was a snapping- g temperature. After about 20
whtltf.Itwsasap ng-atly.as nn teprte.Aer but2 when I was a baby, I had to ''Fall tba ' feeling I wouldn't get a warm
cold Saturday, the first of the y. minutes I decided that even if wen thwsa ba, wIte h d t kabg is not so b 'ad , feein Ihwre.dnt get ng
term. Classes had not yet made "Blue," one of them issued my skis weren't ready I, for one, wearthose little white hoes soothed the ski book authors- reception there. It was ge:tng
with a metal connecting bar. maybe their posteriors have dr nwy
their usual devastating impact with a heavily foreign accent. was acclimatized enough. And that's without even consid-
Andtha'switoutevn cnsi- more padding. I extricated my- I think I'll take ping iong
on my free time, and there werej ering left turns.sl rmth uhad Iridised
five or six inches of'nice scrun- OKI WAX comes in cans of dif- IT WAS ANOTHER 20 minutes gursuccessfuly tbreacadaer- Bu maybe if it's sunny to-
chv snow on the ground. ferent colors for different before I got one ski on my I read somewhere that it helps usccesfto-m i .
I'd owned a pair of cross- y of snow I you use ,ne right foot. I couldn't get the to relax while skiing (You tryical position.morrow
country skis for a couple of that's too sticky, about six boot on the pins and the binding to relax with three huskies on I quickly conjured up a ready'
years. But my residence in inches of snow clumps puder wouldn't snap into place. I be- your feet.) My techniq'ie wa reply should anyone have made Lois Josimovich is a yail3
western Pennsylvania clouded your ski and you move like gan to swear audibly and punch humming classical music. I de- a remark. "No, I didn't fall! staff writer.
my career as a champion skier. Frankenstein's monster. if it's my bindings. This didn't get the cided on Beethoven's Sonata No.
You would understand the prob- too hard you go downhill like ski on but it increased the cir- 12 in A-flat major-just to be
lem if you lived near Pittsburgh greased lightning and wipe out. culation in my knuckles. ostentatious.
because the snow there is us- This is not fun
cally either rain or ismog. So Then I did it. It was on I it was an excellent cUBoIEe.
I came to Michigan in the Anyway I looked on the back felt great. I had conquered a it has a moderately boring
search of the ultimate snow ex- side of the can for directions machine, movement for the flats, a fran-
perienuce which read: "Hienorakeiselle I got up and started to f hukble tic one with lots of crecsendos7 ee
elumelle noin -1"C - -5CsekaI down the trail. A trio of huskies ideal for hurtling downhill out of
jN A FLAIR of eager initiative uudelle lumelle noin -1*C - -"C." danced back and forth over my control, and a funeral march for OUR REGU LAR $1.29
I got up before noon on Satur-
day. I pulled "on my long-johns
and four pairs of kneesocks (all
with the heels out), loaded my
wax kit and boots into a knap-
sack and headed for the hills-
such as they are in the Midwest.
Trudging along the pathway
in the Arb, I looked for a
bunny hill. I shouldn't have
worried. There is no other kind.
I noticed a guy with cross-
This was not helpful.
skis, sniggering. Their owner, the crawl back up.
Daily Photo by PAULINE LUBENS
On the skids
I looked some more and found
the translation: "For fine-
grained snow from about 30*F,
to about 25*F." I also lea'ned
how to write "Polish to a thinI
film" in five different languages.
Boldly peeling back the top
of the can where it said "Ab-
reissen," I started to rub the
wax on the ski bottoms. I'
smoothed it out with the styro-
foam scraper, my hands rapid-
ly approaching absolute zero
because I had taken off my
gloves so the sticky stuff
wouldn't get all over them.
SUNDAY at HILLEL
11:00 a.m.-BRUNCH. Speaker Prof. Gerda
Seligson, "Jews in Germany"-75c
12:30-2 p.m.-ISRAELI DANCING
7:00 p.m.-"THE DREAMER," Cannes Film
orned Beef San i
ON A BAGEL
Mon., Tues., Wed.-Jan. 191 20, & 21
One per Customer
Las Vegas: Where life's a game
(Continued from Page 3)
dy, back room. thrill is not
without its etiquette.
For instance, spitting on the
dice for good luck is frowned
Not knowing the rules, the ac-
ceptable bets, or the proper
jargon, I sidled up to the friend
ly croupier. He agreed to give
me a few pointers. Thirty dol-
lars worth of lessons later, I
knew all the game's nuances. I
could yell, "Big eleven" or
"Press the hard six" with the,
best of 'em. But I can shout
"Ace deuce" or "Big eleven"
at home and it doesn't cost me
EVEN BLACKJACK, the most
popular game of chance in Las
Vegas, has its conventions of
proper conduct. It is hardly de
rigeur to chit chat with ones
neighbor. In fact, in order to
play, one needn't say a word.
To askfor another card, a play-
er merely scratches the table.
Blackjack turned out to be a
natural home. It is only here
that the gambler can control
I began running up my in-
credible string of good luck (as
well as a few empty glasses).
If you have any money left
over from gambling or invest-
ments in fabulous frocks, you
can engage in Las Vegas' num-
ber two industry - sex. The
bulk of prostitution~business is
in "escort services." These
companies advertise freely in
the city's tabloid papers. "Ev-
erything's legal in Las Vegas,"
the ads blare.
And, of course, both male
and female escorts are avail-
At first glance, the degree to
which prostitution has perme-
ed the city is
not avvarent. ' ot limited to ordinairv~
11W------------I l cal ater I had an even sticker
But it really struck home palates. For those with kinkier experience with a demon called Deli & Movie-$3
when a friend of mine tried to tastes, $20 buys 15 minutes of klister-wax. This nauseous stiuff
find a complimentary date for nude wrestling with the model -
a show to which he had compli-# of your choice.
mentary tickets. No holds barred.
"Everyone I asked was a ANN ARBOR-Prepare yourself for the RETURN INVASION of
prostitute," he muttered rue- the monied few. The place
fully. "I was getting friendlyi where many visitors arrive inRC& B E R G M A
with one woman anid I asked; $10,000 Cadillacs and leave in P R O C T O R , ~ -
her ifSshe wanted to go with $60,000 Greyhound buses. The Of the FIRESIGN THEATRE)
me. She told me I'm a work- 30 original settlers in 1855 could,
ing girl. I have to go out before never have pictured what the
SI can go out."'city is today. They were mis- PLUS8ALSO
THE ESCORT SERVICES are sionaries. APPEARING:
f n own comedy
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