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6 | JANUARY 11 • 2024
J
N
column
Comfort Among the Mourners
M
y son Hayim
Yeshurun Katsman
z”l was murdered
by Hamas on the holiday of
Simchat Torah, otherwise
known as Oct. 7 or hashabbat
hashechorah (the black
Sabbath). Over
1,000 Israelis
and others
living, working
and serving in
the area known
as the “Gaza
envelope” were
massacred.
Hayim’s body
was identified
quickly. A representative of
Kibbutz Holit, where Hayim
had lived for the last 11 years,
called at 2:20 on Sunday
morning to let me know that
the army had located his
body. About two hours later, a
policeman and social worker
came to the door to officially
notify me.
For all practical purposes,
our family began to sit
shivah that Sunday morning.
Comforters trickled to
the house, filtered by the
members of my community
who took shifts throughout
the day to serve meals and
deal with the family’s multiple
practical and bureaucratic
needs, including those of my
four young grandchildren.
At any moment, we
expected to learn that Hayim’s
body had been released so
that we could set the time for
the burial. In Israel, it’s rare
for a funeral to be delayed
for more than a day or two.
Although the waiting felt
interminable, in retrospect
we were lucky to be able to
hold the funeral on Thursday
evening, five days after his
death. Some families are only
getting notification now, after
nearly three months, because
the bodies of their loved
ones’ bodies were incinerated
beyond recognition.
During those long days
before the funeral, messages
of condolence inundated
my email, WhatsApp and
Messenger accounts. I
heard from childhood
friends, former co-workers,
distant relatives, parents of
my children’s friends and
eventually even my 89-year-
old third-grade teacher.
Hayim’s friends, colleagues,
teachers and students sent
memories and pictures from
his childhood, his recent trek
to India, his years studying
for his doctorate in Seattle,
peace activism, music, and
his life on Holit where he
served as gardener and was
recently elected as head of the
kibbutz council.
What stood out most was
the variety and intensity of
the connections that Hayim
had made. Colleagues and
friends alike noted how he
approached each person
as an individual, with no
sense of ego or superiority.
Most people he met didn’t
know about his doctorate
or his many talents. He saw
everyone as equal, no matter
their gender, race, religion,
nationality or political
opinions.
I began reposting these
messages and photos on
my Facebook wall, allowing
friends and followers to
mourn with us. Each one
demonstrated a different
aspect of Hayim’s qualities
and interests. I also received
inquiries from press outlets
Hannah
Wacholder
Katsman
Times of
Israel
PURELY COMMENTARY
continued on page 8