MARCH 25 • 2021 | 15

sumed approximately 365,000
total grams of carbohydrates
during their journey. So, it’s
quite likely many of them
developed diabetes, which
ironically was actually the
name of the Pharaoh’s sister-
in-law. You can’t make this
stuff up.
For their history making
efforts, both Moses and
Meghan and Harry landed
blockbuster interviews. Moses
spoke with God on Mount
Sinai while Meghan and
Harry chatted with Oprah in
someone’s backyard. By the
way, if you twist the rules of
an anagram, as only a twisted
mind can do, you can use all
the letters of the word pha-
raoh to spell … Opraahh. I
recognize that observation is
neither historical nor hyster-
ical.
Meanwhile, I hope among
the already vaccinated

Michiganders there is a
healthy number, both literally
and figuratively, who can once
again share seders in person.
I know there’s no way of
determining ahead of time if
Elijah has been vaccinated.
But when you open your front
door at the end of the seder
to let him in, if all you see is
a floating mask, at least you’ll
know he’s being respectful.
For those not able to gather
in person, it will mean you’re
in for another Zoom seder.
Don’t feel too sad, remember,
next year when you get the
whole family back together at
your house, you won’t be able
to mute anybody.

Alan Muskovitz is a writer, voice-over/

acting talent, speaker, and emcee.

Visit his website at laughwithbigal.

com,“Like” Al on Facebook and reach

him at amuskovitz@renmedia.us.

more lemon juice, sometimes
a bit more sugar. When he
was satisfied with the result,
Grandpa let us have one more
taste. Through our tears, we
would agree with Grandpa
that the horseradish was good
this year.
Half the horseradish went
into one bowl for the people
who prefer white horseradish.
We got to grate a beet into
the horseradish in the other
bowl for red horseradish, for
the people who prefer the
more delicate red horseradish.
Grating the beet was much
less dramatic.
Now I have a couple of
horseradish plants growing
in the Southfield clay in my

backyard. In the fall, the
plants display impressive
three-foot tall leaves and
delicate white flowers. Now,
at the beginning of spring, the
leaves are bleached ivory color
and flat on the ground. I plan
to dig up a bucketful of roots,
wash them peel them, and
put them through the grater
before Passover, just like
Grandpa used to do.
One year, I tried to use
a food processor. The
horseradish came out good,
but the food processor never
recovered.
When I prepare for
the seder and remember
Grandpa, I expect to have a
good cry.

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