OCTOBER 22 • 2020 | 33
D
r. Ruth Westheimer
is one of only a few
writers of any faith
whose name universally evokes
smiles. What may not be as
well publicized is the sex ther-
apist’
s grounding in Judaism.
In fact, with all her talk about
sex, she says there is nothing
in what she has written or said
that contradicts the Bible. She
presents her case in the new
paperback edition of Heavenly
Sex: Sexuality and the Jewish
Tradition (NYU Press, Nov. 3,
2020), cowritten by Jonathan
Mark, associate editor at the
Jewish Week.
I recently interviewed Dr.
Ruth to see how the 92-year-old
therapist is doing and to talk
about sex and Judaism.
YOU WERE A HOLOCAUST
ORPHAN AND WERE
WOUNDED WHEN YOU
WERE A SNIPER FOR THE
ISRAELI ARMY. DO YOU
THINK YOU, OR YOUR
GENERATION, WHICH
LIVED THROUGH SO
MANY HORRIBLE THINGS
EARLY IN LIFE, MADE YOU
APPRECIATE LIFE, AND
SEX, A LITTLE MORE?
RW: Definitely, in my case, the
appreciation of life is no ques-
tion. But I’
ll tell you also, since
I’
m one of the few children that
did survive — one-and-a-half
million Jewish children were
killed — I knew I had an obli-
gation to make something out
of my life. But I did not know
that it would be talking about
sex. That, I did not know.
LET’S TALK ABOUT SEX
AND THE BIBLE. THERE’S A
LOT OF IT GOING ON, AND
NOT ALL OF IT BETWEEN
HUSBAND AND WIFE. WHY
DO YOU THINK THE BIBLE,
WHICH IS SUPPOSED TO
CONTAIN MANY LESSONS
FOR HOW TO LIVE OUR
LIVES, IS SO FILLED WITH
SEXUAL ELEMENTS?
RW: Because sex is an import-
ant part. You and I would not
be in this world without sex.
However, you are absolutely
right. For example, the Book of
Ruth talks about how she kind
of seduced Boaz. They are such
interesting stories because what
they wanted to make sure is that
there are next generations.
On Friday night, the husband
says “
A Woman of Valor.
” In
that prayer, toward the end, is
one sentence that I believe is the
most sexually arousing in the
world. The husband says to the
wife, “There are many wonder-
ful women out there who do
wonderful things, but you are
the very best.
” And in my expe-
rience as a sex therapist, there is
nothing better for a woman to
hear than that. And really, that
book is the best sex manual of
all time.
But I want to tell you some-
thing with a hypothesis that
Dr. Ruth tackles how the Jewish
tradition approaches sexuality.
HOWARD LOVY CONTRIBUTING WRITER
Sex & Judaism
ARTS&LIFE
BOOKS
continued on page 34
COURTESY OF AMAZON PUBLISHING
Dr. Ruth
“NEVER, IN
THE JEWISH
TRADITION,
IS THERE
ANYTHING
PROHIBITING
SEX IN ANY
POSITION.”
— DR. RUTH