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8 | MAY 21 • 2020
1942 - 2020
Covering and Connecting
Jewish Detroit Every Week
jn
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How to reach us see page 10
Views
child. Use words such as: “I
hear you.
” “This hurts so much.
”
“This is so incredibly disap-
pointing.
” “This is so hard to
believe.
”
Encourage your kids to share
their feelings. Give them space,
if and when needed. Some kids
will have a lot to say and show
many emotions. Others may
take time and will need help
verbalizing their feelings. Many
teens may lean more into their
friends. This is OK. Encourage
their connections and let them
know you are there. While feel-
ings may be very intense, avoid
words such as “devastating” and
“catastrophic.
” Reflect where
they are with accurate labels
while modeling a resolve that
we will recover and heal.
Providing hope for the future
can be helpful while recog-
nizing kids may not be ready
to hear about how they will
have many more summers or
opportunities. Adults have this
vantage while kids’
perspective
is based more in the present.
Encourage your kids to connect
with friends and family, share
photos, stories and memories.
Allow for them to talk about
what they will miss and what
is lost.
One of the concerns for
many campers is the plan for
next summer. Will they get
to make up the program that
was lost? The honest answer is
camps have so much to figure
out in the weeks and months
ahead. Acknowledge the
uncertainty and discuss how
they have successfully dealt
with the unknown in the past.
Encourage kids to share ideas
with their camp. Having their
voice heard can help. Think of
ways to financially support our
community camps as they will
need our help to survive.
FINDING THE POSITIVE
Families are now facing very
practical challenges with job
commitments and day care.
Children and teens desperately
want to see their friends again.
Families are stressed. The old
adage of one day at a time is
a good approach for now. We
need to find positives in each
day while we navigate these
uncharted waters.
Parents are asking how to
keep our kids occupied with
meaningful activities. Here is a
golden opportunity that lies in
the days and weeks ahead:
When the raw emotion
begins to settle and the time
feels right, talk with your kids
about what they gain from
going to camp. Ask your child
why the camp experience is
so important. Parents should
reflect on this question, too.
Is it about connecting with
friends? Building and growing
new friendships? Being authen-
tic and your best version of
yourself? Trying new things?
Unplugging?
No, we can’
t re-create camp
in the same exact way. We can’
t
replace the loss. However, if we
really consider these thoughts as
opportunities, we can approach
our coming weeks similar to
camp. By being creative and
resourceful, we can tap into
the spirit, the essence and even
some of the magic of camp.
Talk with your child, teens
and/or young adult about how
they can be more authentic,
vulnerable and accepting
in their relationships. Light
Shabbat candles. Sing together.
Take your child on a hike. Build
a fire. Find new and unique
arts and crafts projects. Create
a family Havdalah, reflecting
on the past week together while
sharing feelings and looking
ahead. Look out at the stars
each night. These are just some
examples and together families
can discover many more. If we
integrate these types of expe-
riences into our families in the
coming weeks, the impact will
be great for your family and the
memories can be very special.
Losing a summer of camp is
very painful for our kids and
the community of camps. At
the end of the day, it’
s said that
camp is about people and the
relationships. This is not just a
camp lesson but also a lesson
we learn in life.
Relationships shape the core
of who we all are, and they will
help us heal from this moment
in time. No relationship is more
important than the one with
your child. This is exactly what
will help you, your family and
community get through this
very difficult time.
Dr. Daniel Klein is a licensed clinical
psychologist and founder of Child and
Family Solutions Center. A self-de-
scribed “camp lifer” whose career
was inspired by camp, he is a former
camper, counselor and parent of two
campers who live for their summers.
He presently serves as an officer on
the board of directors of the Bloomfield
Hills based nonprofit Tamarack Camps.
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