bridal 2018
The reception at Belle Isle’s Flynn Pavilion. Shaarey
Zedek’s Rabbi Aaron Starr (not shown) and two of
Yoni's close friends from rabbinical school, Rabbi Alex
Braver, left, and Rabbi Zach Sitkin, right, all had a hand
in the ceremony.
continued from page 54
CLOCKWISE: Dressed up in schtick. Ready for dinner. The bride and
groom during the hora. Yoni’s wooden engagement ring. “After we got
engaged,” Meredith says, “we thought it felt natural for Yoni to have
a ring, too — it echoed the fact that we treat our relationship as a
partnership rooted in equality.” A quiet moment.
56
January 25 • 2018
jn
selves how we could make it respectful
of our values while remaining true to
the ikar, the essence, of the tradition
or ritual.”
The tisch, for example, is a commu-
nal celebration that takes place before
the actual ceremony. Traditionally, it
is reserved for the chatan (groom) and
the other men. “But we wanted ours
to be for everyone,” Meredith says. “We
sat side-by-side as our friends and
family offered toasts, gave bits of Torah
and sang traditional songs. Our friend
led the tisch — and there wasn’t a dry
eye around that table.”
The couple also wanted to include
the tradition of circling, when the kal-
lah (bride) circles around the groom
seven times, symbolizing completion,
wholeness and the unity of the rela-
tionship. Keeping with the couple’s
egalitarian approach, they each circled
each other three times, then made
one additional circle together, hand in
hand.
“It was incredibly important to
us, and it felt indescribably special
to both of us,” Meredith says. “Our
circles presented to our family and
friends a small symbol of who we are,
as two individuals who commit to the
unity and the completion, as equally
obligated and responsible in making
a partnership of trust and consistent
growth.”
The Shevah Brachot, or Seven
Blessings, at the end of the ceremony
offered an opportunity for friends and
family to be active participants in the
couple’s wedding, Jewish or not.
“Some friends read to us the tradi-
tional blessings in Hebrew, and others
presented interpretive English varia-
tions of those blessings,” Yoni says. “It’s
hard to describe the emotions of that
moment. We got to stand a couple of
feet away from the people we love as
they blessed us with the words of our
tradition or with words straight from
their heart.”
The couple found a way to extend
the traditional aspects of a Jewish
wedding in a larger way, too. “We
invited family and close friends from
around the world to join us for a
Shabbaton leading up to our wedding
day,” Meredith says. “Starting Friday
night with kabbalat Shabbat and
Shabbat dinner, we spent a weekend
together praying, eating, singing, eat-
ing, celebrating — and eating.
“Incorporating the tradition this
way made the celebration bigger than
just us. It connected us to our roots.
It allowed us to celebrate with fam-
ily who are no longer with us and
with generations upon generations of
ancestors. Not every Jew in the world
was getting married that weekend, but
throughout the world, Jews were pray-
ing, reading Torah and delighting in
Shabbat,” Yoni says. “And in some way,
it felt like we were celebrating with all
of them.
“Our rabbis of blessed memory
knew what they were doing,” he says.
“They recognized that ritual is about
much more than just looking pretty.
It’s about keeping us in the moment,
forcing us to focus on the here and
now and to just be. In its essence, the
wedding ritual of Judaism is a type
continued on page 58
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January 25, 2018 - Image 56
- Resource type:
- Text
- Publication:
- The Detroit Jewish News, 2018-01-25
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