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A38
November 22 • 2007
Whadda Ya Say?
Ann Arbor
I
as it's not in English. I don't bring this
up as a criticism, but to point out how
confusing it is for many people —espe-
cially non-Jews — who want to say the
right thing but often don't know how.
My Protestant parents have made
huge strides recently by calling
on Erev Rosh Hashanah and
wishing my wife and daughters
a happy New Year (although,
sometimes they check with me
first to make sure that saying
"happy" is proper on this par-
ticular holiday). After confirm-
ing with me, my brother wished
Bonnie an easy fast on Yom
Kippur. It means a lot to her that
they are all making an effort. I
just wish I had a cheat sheet for
them to reference.
Going over the different greetings was
helpful not only to my family, but also
to me. As I am the Christian member of
a Jewish interfaith family, I am often in
Jewish surroundings. I want to sound
like someone who's in the know. At least
now I feel that I am better prepared for
next year. II
hope everyone had a nice High
Holiday season. I was going to start
off this column by saying, "Happy
New Year," but I think that it's too late to
do so.
That's really my prob-
lem — I have a hard time
knowing exactly what
greetings are appropriate
during the Jewish holidays.
Is it too early to say this? Is
it too late to say that? Is it a
happy holiday? Is it a som-
ber holiday?
After 21 years as a
Christian in an interfaith
relationship, I can't believe
that I still stumble. Let me
see if I can make some sense of it here.
During Rosh Hashanah, I let the salu-
tations fly. I was fully confident saying
"Happy New Year" to people. I even let
loose a "Shanah Tovah" here and there
(the Hebrew for "Happy New Year"). It
wasn't until Yom Kippur that I began
having difficulty again.
This Day of Atonement is a somber
holiday and I've always thought that
Jim Keen is a freelance writer and columnist
the greeting should be somewhat som-
for InterfaithFamily.com . He is the author of
ber. Walking into temple for services
Inside Intermarriage: A Christian Partner's
Shabbat morning, my friend handing
Perspective on Raising a Jewish Family
out prayer books greeted me with a
(URJ Press).
"Shanah Tovah:" I stuttered the same
phrase back to her. As we took our seats,
I asked my wife, Bonnie, about it. "How
can you wish someone a happy any-
A Penny Saved
thing on Yom Kippur? Is it appropriate?" Start counting pennies for the 13th
"You can pretty much say "Shanah
annual Tzedakah Experience for sixth-
Tova" until the Book of Life is closed at
graders and their families. The event is
the end of the holiday — I think',' she
planned for Sunday, Jan. 27, from 9:45
replied, tepidly confident. "Cant you?"
to 11:45 a.m. at Congregation Shaarey
she said turning to our friend, Staci, in
Zedek, 27375 Bell Road in Southfield.
the seat next to her. Staci eventually con-
Sponsored by the Federation's
curred after giving it a bit of thought. I
Alliance for Jewish Education and
then realized that I wasn't the only one
Women's Department, LaSalle Bank,
who didn't know for sure.
Metro Detroit Board of Jewish Educators
After services, we discussed the
and Congregation Shaarey Zedek
options in detail. Things you can say
with Corporate Partner the DeRoy
on both holidays: "Happy New Year,"
Testamentary Foundation, the children's
"Shanah Tovah" and its full version,
event puts fun into fundraising using
"L'Shanah Tovah Tikatevu" ("May
coins collected in a Penny Harvest to
you be inscribed for a good year). In
teach valuable lessons in charitable giv-
addition, my in-laws like to say, "Gut
ing and community services. Students
Yontif,' which is Yiddish for "Good (or
will participate in a Choose Your Own
Happy) Holiday'
Adventure road rally and will shop for
Yom Kippur-specific greetings
volunteer projects in the Mitzvah Mall.
include, "Have an easy fast."What if
Highlights will include hands-on
you don't know if they are fasting? You
activities learning about community
can simply say, "Have a meaningful
agencies and allocating dollars to Jewish
Yom Kippur." However, you cannot say,
communal organizations.
"Happy Yom Kippur!"
For information, call Jennifer
So there's the part I don't get — you
Greenhill, (248) 203-1460, or e-mail
can say "happy" on Yom Kippur, as long
greenhill@jfmd.org.