For Openers
Behind The Words
S
know what will happen to you."
What she means: That's true because
nothing ever works with the kid in the
way of threats.
She says: "Just you wait till your
father gets home."
She means: Then there will be two
against one and you'll be sorry.
ay what you mean and mean what you say is
valid advice. However, these days we hear
more of Orwell's Doublespeak since what
people say and what they mean are
often divergent. Here are some samples of
what is said and what I think is meant.
The Politician
He says: "I am for the rights of the com-
mon man."
What he means: I am FOR
the common man to elect me
and then I will vote any way
that will gain me favor in
the political arena.
He says: "We need bet-
ter schools and more play
areas for our children."
What he means: These
ARE our needs. I, howev-
SY
MANELLO er, have no plans as to
how to get them.
Editorial
Assistant
The Advertiser
He says: "This is a one-
of-a-kind offer."
What he means: No other dealer got stuck with this item
and we must get rid of it.
He says: "You pay no interest for one year."
What he means: At the end of the year, you owe us more
than you care to imagine.
The Child
She says: "Everyone else has one."
What she means: Some child some-
where got her parent to buy something for her.
She says: "You just don't care.' ,
What she means: Youve agreed to the tongue
piercing, but asked that it be done by a licensed
practitioner.
A Directions Giver
He says: "Just follow this road for about two miles; you
can't miss it."
What he means: You're lost.
He says: "Do two rights, a left and then follow the
detour sign."
What he means: You're lost.
He says: "You can't get there from here."
What he means: He's lost.
-
The Movie Reviewer
He says: "This film captures the essence of the genre."
What he means: I didn't understand it at all, but they don't
pay me to say that.
He says: "This was a rare performance.
What he means: Remember that rare means not too well
done.
The Waitperson
He says: "May I recommend the chef's special?"
What he means: We're pushing the meatloaf tonight.
What he says: "I've had a lot of requests for that."
What he means: Many people want it taken back to the
kitchen.
What he says: "I'll be right back with your drinks."
What he means: I only have six other tables to serve so you
might see me in a while.
"
The Parent
What she says: "If you don't stop this minute, I don't
The Grandchild
What he says: "I love you grandma-grandpa. I really do."
What he means: I love you grandma-grandpa. I really do. ❑
Shabbat Candlelighting
"The Shabbat candles remind me that God is everywhere."
Matthew Unger, West Bloomfield
first grade, Ealy Elementary School
Sponsored by Lubavitch
Women's Organization.
To submit a candlelighting
message or to receive
complimentary candlesticks
and information on Shabbat
candleligking, call Miriam
Amzalak of Oak Park at
(248) 967-5056 or e-mail:
amzdak@juno.com
'cha
fi n' t Know 02002
hich business transac-
tions described in the
Hebrew Scriptures
strengthen the Jewish
claim to Israel?
— by Goldfein
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qoDEf • -gepow -11AT jo poop SuItisaitp
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age pasEtiamd untrelqv uamstry
Quotables
"I feel that it is my duty to expose the
more positive aspects of this country. I
have begun to fear that the portrayal of
Israel as an unjust society is eroding our
self-image, so I've decided that as things
get worse, I will continue to highlight
the positive aspects."
— Amnon Rubinstein, law professor and
founder of the leftist Meretz Party in
Israel, in an interview with the Forward.
"If ever a people could have, should
have, might have been tempted by the
pollution of evil, it is the Jewish people.
Yet, what I have found ... in the Jewish
people that I've met in the course of my
life is quite to the contrary."
— Political pundit and talk show host
Alan Keyes, as quoted in an interview in
the October issue of Hadassah magazine.
'All I could think was, 'Why are you
doing this?' I looked at him and I saw
how determined he was to blow up and
it was as if he was a robot who was pro-
grammed to blow up."
— Israeli bus driver Baruch Neuman,
who momentarily subdued a Palestinian
suicide bomber at a bus stop along a
major highway east ofTel Aviv on
Oct. 10, as quoted by Al? The bomber
and a 71-year-old Israeli woman
died in the blast.
Yiddish Limericks
Candlelighting
Candlelighting
Friday, Oct. 18: 6:28 p.m.
Friday, Oct. 25: 6:17 p. m.
Shabbat Ends
Shabbat Ends
Saturday, Oct. 19: 7:28 p.m.
Saturday, Oct. 26: 7:18 p.m.
Some signs have begun to appear
Within. Reform temples this year.
Tradition's on track;
The mills* is back.
"We welcome 'fringe' elements here."
— Martha Jo Fleischmann
* traditional fringed prayer shawl
10/18
2002
11