1
Ask Wendy
When A Child Wants To Enlist:
What's A Mother To Do?
Dear Wendy:
My son is a junior at Bar-
Ilan University in Israel. For
the past several weeks, he has
been calling daily to tell me he
wants to enlist in the Israeli
army. As the situation in
Jerusalem worsens, many of his
friends have been called up to
fight. Should I fly to Israel and
bring him home?
enlisting, while you would
have the immeasurable comfort
of knowing he is alive, you
could still lose him. Your son is
20, not 12. Legally, he can do
whatever he wants.
Avoid the daily phone
calls, fights and anger, and
write him a letter saying what
you need to say. And before
WENDY
you have finished writing that
BELZBERG
Life Endangering Dilemma
letter, grant him permission to
The correct answer to your
do what he needs to do. The
Special to
question is: No, you should not
fact that you can even present a
the Jewish News
fly to Israel and force your son
case is a luxury the mothers of
to come home. The real answer,
Israeli soldiers do not have. For
however, is that if it were my child who
Israeli mothers and sons, there is neither
wanted to enlist, I don't know what I
any such dialogue nor any such dilemma.
would do.
You know that if you let your son
enlist, you could lose him. You also know
Dear Wendy:
that, even if you prohibit him from
My children attend a Jewish day
—
-
reed4' gworem
school and have been told that celebrat-
ing Halloween is the equivalent of wor-
shipping "a false God." They just want
to go trick-or-treating with their friends.
Now what?
—
Sweet Interludes
Any Jewish day school worth its
tuition should describe Halloween as a
celebration of Christian saints and the
most pagan of Christian holidays. I com-
mend the teachers at your school for a
job well done.
Having said that, the only god my
children worship on Halloween is the
God of Candy. A worshipper at that same
altar myself, I could not ask my children
to forsake the celebration despite what
they may have heard in school.
(Especially when all of our neighbors —
Jews and non-Jews alike — will be leav-
ing bowls full of chocolate right outside
their doors.)
It is the job of the school and its
teachers to teach, but it is your job and
right as a parent to guide and to have the
final say. Your children can feel perfectly
comfortable resuming their Jewish studies
the morning after dressing up as knights
and maidens and gorging themselves on
sweets.
Halloween is a secular celebration, a
point you can easily impress upon your
children. If they ask to bring a Christmas
tree into the house, however, that's where
I would draw the line. 0
to "Ask Wendy" at 954
*ftipn Ave. #189, New York,
021, or e-mail
iikwencly0thejewishnews.com
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