1 Ask Wendy When A Child Wants To Enlist: What's A Mother To Do? Dear Wendy: My son is a junior at Bar- Ilan University in Israel. For the past several weeks, he has been calling daily to tell me he wants to enlist in the Israeli army. As the situation in Jerusalem worsens, many of his friends have been called up to fight. Should I fly to Israel and bring him home? enlisting, while you would have the immeasurable comfort of knowing he is alive, you could still lose him. Your son is 20, not 12. Legally, he can do whatever he wants. Avoid the daily phone calls, fights and anger, and write him a letter saying what you need to say. And before WENDY you have finished writing that BELZBERG Life Endangering Dilemma letter, grant him permission to The correct answer to your do what he needs to do. The Special to question is: No, you should not fact that you can even present a the Jewish News fly to Israel and force your son case is a luxury the mothers of to come home. The real answer, Israeli soldiers do not have. For however, is that if it were my child who Israeli mothers and sons, there is neither wanted to enlist, I don't know what I any such dialogue nor any such dilemma. would do. You know that if you let your son enlist, you could lose him. You also know Dear Wendy: that, even if you prohibit him from My children attend a Jewish day — - reed4' gworem school and have been told that celebrat- ing Halloween is the equivalent of wor- shipping "a false God." They just want to go trick-or-treating with their friends. Now what? — Sweet Interludes Any Jewish day school worth its tuition should describe Halloween as a celebration of Christian saints and the most pagan of Christian holidays. I com- mend the teachers at your school for a job well done. Having said that, the only god my children worship on Halloween is the God of Candy. A worshipper at that same altar myself, I could not ask my children to forsake the celebration despite what they may have heard in school. (Especially when all of our neighbors — Jews and non-Jews alike — will be leav- ing bowls full of chocolate right outside their doors.) It is the job of the school and its teachers to teach, but it is your job and right as a parent to guide and to have the final say. Your children can feel perfectly comfortable resuming their Jewish studies the morning after dressing up as knights and maidens and gorging themselves on sweets. Halloween is a secular celebration, a point you can easily impress upon your children. If they ask to bring a Christmas tree into the house, however, that's where I would draw the line. 0 to "Ask Wendy" at 954 *ftipn Ave. #189, New York, 021, or e-mail iikwencly0thejewishnews.com WA.4,Wit t" Weak, Vsig..e.YOM-1 4:‘ Eldercare Home Care Grou • Providing quality care for over 10 years. • Available 24 Hours • Reliable • Personal Care • Bonded/Insured • Hourly or live-in care Serving Wayne, Oakland and Macomb Co. 800-571-2273 aG 04`1,!4ligttA Daniel D. Sherbert, M.D., F.A.C.S WEST MAPLE PLASTIC SURGERY • Breast • Face • Tummy Tucks • Liposuction • Lip Augmentation • Laser Surgery for Facial Wrinkles • Reconstruction Breast Surgery 5807 W. Maple Rd., Suite 177, West Bloomfield Phone: (248) 865-6400 Fax: (248) 865-6404 (honna Feldman-Nelson, MSW, ACSW, P. Psychotherapist Specializing in: Couples, Eating Disorders, EMDR, Adult Incest Survivors & Chemical Dependency 31000 Telegraph Rd, Suite 150 Bingham Farms, MI 48025 248-723-4114 217 Knowles, Suite 200 Royal Oak, MI 48067 } 248-542-9076 atuttaktit. tuac-%*'7. .g.tzttwx-sArt:0,<,*,, , g4"%:04 .t ir,V;AfaVvW4•;44 ",* Prea • LOSE WEIGHT GET FIT! Free session with mention of this ad. BARI BECKETT Certified Personal Trainer Featured on TV and in National Magazines Intentional Health Inc. (248) 681-1397 www.intentionalhealth.corn LAUREL A. SILLS, Psy. D. Fully Licensed Clinical Psychologist Individuals • Couples Self Esteem • Sexuality • Panic • Chronic Pain • E.M.D.R. Short Term Therapy with Long Term Results Day or Evening Hours 248 788 4230 - - Maria I. Curtis, CERTIFIED IN PERMANENT MAKE - UP APPLICATION Specializing In: • Microderrnabrasion • Stretch Marks • Dark Spots • Acne Scars & Other Scars • Fine Lines & Wrinkles •California Power Peel A skin rejuvenation'Ireatment for you. Call for a FREE consultation now! 248.361.7978 DeVinney Czarnecki Physical Therapy, P.C. Specializing in Manual Therapy and Exercise Loren DeVinney, PT., O.M.P.T. John Czarnecki, PT., O.M.P.T. 5839 W. Maple Rd., Suite 100, West Bloomfield 48322 (248) 851.6999 SIMONA A. SEIDERMAN, ACSW, DCSW CHILDREN ADOLESCENTS ADULTS SENIOR ADULTS Anxiety - Depression - Grief - Relationships - Stress a healthier koli P bridge to (248) 400 3324 - SASeiderman@aol.com R.N., CDT. Skin Care Consultant m.> \k,.%%\ximwm . iwaew E-Mail: mariaisabe199@aol.corn Amanda L. Gurwin, M.S., CCC/SLP Speech Pathologist Home Care for Children 248.865.9039 agurwinSLP@yahoo.com 10/27 2000 133