Meaningful Minyan
Jewish prayer isn't always easy but it can work for you.
M
y wife and I sit together in our Adat
Shalom Synagogue Shiffman Chapel
for daily prayer. We seek out the
minyan (prayer quorum) as often as we can.
Sometimes we come to the minyan because
one of us is saying Kaddish (prayer for the
dead), as my wife is now or because I, as a
rabbi, have responsibilities at the daily minyan.
Even more than these reasons, we seek out the
minyan as an opportunity to pray and to be
with other Jews who seek out the joy of the
prayer ritual.
We sit in our minyan with people all around
us. Most of us try to speak to God through
prayer or to reflect on whatever comes to
mind. Yes, my wife and I do speak to each
other on occasion during the prayers and
others around us converse with each other, too,
but most times, my wife and I hear the sounds
of prayer around us and that encourages our
own prayers.
Prayer, especially in a minyan, is a very
special religious experience for me. It
symbolizes my dependence upon the
community and my need for the prayer ritual
that inspires action.
The Talmud puts it this way: "Man's prayer
is not accepted unless he puts his heart in his
hands" (Taanit 8A). I cannot pray that God
should love the Jewish people without my own
active expression of love for our people. I
cannot pray for the welfare of the synagogue
without participating in synagogue life and
without helping the synagogue. Similarly, my
prayers for the community and for my family
require that I take an active role in each.
Can prayer work for you? It can if you try to
make it work.
Prayer is not easy. The rabbis teach that we
have to pray and to reflect for an hour before
saying the Silent Devotion (Brachot 30a) in
order to feel a sense of meaning in the words.
There are other preconditions for prayer. In the
Talmud, we are warned not to pray when we
are irritated (Eruvin 65a). One who is in
distress should not make decisions. To pray
means to make important
decisions in our lives. As
one rabbi put it, "To pray
means to discriminate, to
evaluate, to understand, in
other words to ask
intelligently." We ask God
to give us the ability to
Rabbi Herbert
know what to ask for and
Yoskowitz
for what not to ask.
There are limits to prayer. While we need to
pray, we are not permitted to pray for
everything and anything. For example, we
cannot pray for eternal youth. We can pray for
courage to meet the challenges that may be
unique to people in our age bracket. But at age
60, we can't pray to God to run a five-minute
mile even if in our youth, we were able to do
that.
The rabbis also speak of tefillat shay
foolish or vain prayers. A woman advanced in
her pregnancy may not pray to God that the
embryo should be male. The rabbis teach that
whoever cries out over that which already has
appeared pronounces a vain prayer.
When we pray to God, we not only try to
move God but to move the divine within
ourselves. We care not only if God listens to
our prayers, but that we listen to our prayers as
well. Via prayer, we move ourselves in regard to
our attitude, our will or our value system.
When we pray to God, we must pray with
open hands, not with closed ones, and with
legs ready to move, not crossed. Prayer moves
us to action. The Jewish ritual of prayer can
bring a greater sense of holiness both
personally and collectively. At the least, it can
inspire us to move in that direction.
Now you know why my wife and I — and
so many others — enjoy being part of the
prayer community at Adat Shalom Synagogue
and other places of Jewish worship. I wish you
happy and fulfilling prayers at your own
synagogue or temple, at home or wherever else
you may be.
Rabbi Herbert Yoskowitz is a rabbi at Adat Shalom Synagogue.
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