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•• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
The Lonely Girl
very now and then I hear a
troubling story from someone,
and it bothers me so much I
don't know what to do.
T hat's when I turn to you. For not
only do you listen
patiently and thoughtfully,
often you provide me
with the best guidance.
Thankfully, this is not a
story about a child who
is being horribly abused,
or one who is terribly dis-
abled. But it's not a
happy story. It's a tale of
a little girl lost. I'll call
her Susan. Susan is 8 and she lives
near a friend of mine.
don't know what it is, but
Susan% parents just don't seem inter-
ested in taking care of her. She is
always at someone else's house,
roaming the neighborhood, looking
for some place to stay. Once she
came to my house after school and
was very hungry; I fed her three
sandwiches and a bowl of ice
cream. I'm sure her parents love
Oh her, but they seem so disinterested.
That's why I think of Susan as the
lonely girl."
"Maybe the parents both work full
time and it's the baby sitter who is
negligent?' I wondered.
But no. The mother doesn't work
out of the house, and while the
~father does have a full-time job,
even when he's home he's not see-
ing to the care of Susan or her
older siblings.
"She has spent hours and hours
and hours at our home, and her
parents never know where she is.
`Once, Susan even came over and
announced: 'My mother has to go
out and asked me to see whether I
could come stay with you for a few
hours.' Mind you, I have never met
Susan's mother. I explained to
Susan that my daughter, with whom
she plays, wasn't home.
Susan wanted to come anyway. It
was heartbreaking to have to say
no, but what could I do?"
I don't have an answer. I
am a firm believer in the
idea of letting children
play by themselves. At
least once a day, I
encourage mine to color
or build with bricks or
play dress up — whatev-
er they want, so long as
they are off using their
own imaginations and
are far away from parental guid-
ance and supervision. It benefits
them, I can see clearly; and it most
certainly gives me a much need
break.
But whether we want to acknowl-
edge it or not, young children also
need our direction throughout much
of their waking life: to see that they
have enough to eat, to play games
with them from time to time, to help
them with their homework, to ask
what kind of day they had, to hug
them, to hear their jokes and
admire their drawings. To be there
and to be involved — that's what it
means to parent.
-
SUPER B
SUPER FR1EN
SUPER PA TY
•• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
Sunday, January 31 • 5:00 p.m.
at the
BAD FROG TAVERN
555 Old Woodward
Birmingham t
Ages 21-33
904 Waal
full Set
$26.00
Fill In
$16.00
Silk Wrap/Gel Nails .. $30.00
Gel fill & SiII rill .... $20.00
Manicures with Free Parafin Treatment • Pedicures with Message
(248) 538-0948
To send an 8-year-old child out to
fend for herself all day is ridiculous-
ly lazy. Not to keep tabs on her
whereabouts for hours on end is
nothing less than shameful. II
Sugar Tree Plaza
6235 Orchard Lake Rd. • West Bloomfield
unique
shoes
bags
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Hospitality Gifts
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Elizabeth Applebaum
AppleTree Editor
You can reach Elizabeth Applebaum
at (248) 354 6060, ext. 308, or at
philapple@earthlink.net .
-
(248) 474-3312
WE
DELIVER!
1/29
1999
Detroit Jewish News
77