Rated PG-13
"life" — which can't include his
wife. She's remarried, to Sim-
mons' best friend, Terry (D.B.
murdered mercenary re- Sweeney), and they now have a
turns from the dead as an child.
unlikely costumed hero in
A mysterious man named
pawn.
Cogliostro (Nicol Williamson) —
While the film tries to recreate whom Spawn accurately and de-
some of the look of Todd McFar- risively refers to as a "Yoda" —
lane's immensely popular
seems to know all about
comic book, the result is
Spawn's powers and fate,
MOVIES
hard on both the eyes and
and helps him fight the
mind. Spawn opens with
clown from Hell. This leads
Al Simmons (Michael Jai White) to several action-packed but point-
assassinating some folks in a most less fight scenes, full of sound and
unheroic manner. Why? Because morphing but signifying nothing.
Simmons' boss, Jason Wynn
Spawn has little to offer any
(Martin Sheen), is in cahoots with but the most rabid fans. The act-
a demon from Hell (John ing is mostly wooden, due in no
Leguizamo), who's taken the form small part to the script. White,
Randle, Sweeney and
Williamson try but can do
little with their roles.
Leguizamo has the
showiest part, and gets
points just for putting on
that constricting costume,
but is just plain irritating
(his speech is filled with
distracting movie and TV
references, kind of like the
Genie from Aladdin).
Sheen, a pro, comes off
best as the hammy bad
guy Wynn, but he's no
Hannibal Lecter. And de-
but director Mark Dippe
previously created special
effects for Jurassic Park
and other pictures, but
even on that level Spawn
falls short. Spawn's cos
tume looks like playdough.
The scenes of Hell look like
Michael Jai White stars in Spawn.
those unfocused magic 3-D
of a wise-cracking, dwarfish clown_ pictures. Even the credits are
The demon wants Wynn to jump- painful to watch. They don't stop
start Armageddon ; and also to re- vibrating long enough for you to
cruit Simmons (he's a paid killer read them without suffering eye-
after all).
strain.
So Wynn kills Simmons, who
If you're a Spawn fan, you're
then makes a vague deal with the better off rereading your comics,
devil to return to Earth to see his or looking for the animated series
wife, Wanda (Theresa Randle). currently running on HBO.
Simmons is resurrected five years Everyone else, abandon all hope
later as a mass of "necroplasm" ye who enter here.
dubbed Spawn (short for
Hellspawn), with face and body
burned beyond recognition, and a
costume with magic chains and a
—Stephen Bitsoli
computer-animated cape (it seems
to magically appear whenever it
will look cool). He also has some
vague magical powers that he's
warned are limited (when he uses
them up, he'll return to Hell ... for-
Very Good
ever!).
Soon Spawn's trying to avenge
his death, and adjust to his new
As
Rated R
lands Fletcher in a men-
tal hospital with a gag-
gle of federal agents
th be told, there are actu- clamoring for custody.
ally two conspiracies at work Chief among the feds is
in Conspiracy Theory: one oc- a mysterious psychia-
Tcu1 rring on screen, the other trist named Jonas
taking place behind the scenes.
("Star Trek's" Patrick
The on-screen story focuses on Stewart) who has a
Jerry Fletcher (Mel Gibson), a bab- zealous concern for
bling, paranoid taxi-cab driver who Fletcher's whereabouts
lives in a booby-trapped fortress that piques Sutton's cu-
of an apartment. From there, safe riosity.
from intruders and spies, he pub-
Soon enough, she
lishes a rag devoted to far-fetched gets entangled in
conspiracy postulations. In Gib- Fletcher's plight and the
son's world view, a conspiracy ex- two spend the remain-
ists behind every aspect of life, der of the film evading
from fluoride in the water system double agents, brain-
to overseas earthquakes; and he
washed assassins and
is eager to explain his
realistic plot turns.
theories, disjointed as
Initially, the film
MOVIES
they may be, to any-
works as a humor-
one within earshot.
ous commentary on
After watching him foist his modern politics with
rhetoric on countless unsuspect- Fletcher spewing such Mel Gibson and Julia Roberts in Conspiracy Theory.
ing citizens of New York City, we nonsensical propagan-
learn that Alice Sutton (Julia da that one wonders if some of it
The behind-the-scenes conspir-
Roberts) is among the few who are could actually be true. As the sto- acy alluded to above is much eas-
willing to listen. It seems that Sut- ry evolves, however, it becomes ev- ier to follow. It involves pairing the
ton, an attorney for the United ident that the film does not aspire leading male box office attraction
States Department of Justice, re- to any ideal beyond creating some with the most popular actress in
served a soft spot for the volatile political intrigue, and, for a while, cinema in an insidious plot to sep-
Fletcher after he rescued her from that works too.
arate you from your entertain-
a mugging some six months ear-
Unfortunately, as the story ment dollar. And it will probably
lier.
grows more complicated, it be- succeed.
Soon, Sutton's loyalty is tested, comes less sophisticated, ulti-
when an arrest for a public tirade mately bogging down in its own
ennui before limping to the finish
RichmANalprinisan
— Richard Halpin
line.
attorney I film critic.
-
Bagel Barometer
__Outstanding
Stephen Bitsoli is an editorial
assistant at The Macomb
Daily.
No Etages...", ........ .AlArfui
'Air Bud'
Rated PG
ir Bud is about a lonely boy
who finds a dog-who turns
out to be his best friend and
makes him popular. Kids
who are 4-14 years old will real-
ly like this movie.
Josh Framm, a 12-year-old
boy, moves to a new town and
has no friends and no one to talk
to. Since his father's death, he's
lost interest in basketball, his fa-
vorite sport, but finds an old,
abandoned court to play on One
day on the court, Josh meets a
stray dog named Buddy. Josh
discovers that Buddy loves to
A
Nathan Greenberg (age 9) and
Matthew Greenberg (age 6
1 /2) are brothers. They attend
Hillel Day School and live in.
Franklin.
play basketball,
and can actually
shoot hoops!
Josh joins the
school basketball
team, and Buddy
becomes the team
mascot. When Bud-
dy's former owner
hears about Bud-
dy's success, he
takes Buddy back
because he wants
to make money off
him.
It is really sad
and not joyful
enough for kids.
We liked the Kevin Zegers stars with- Buddy in Air Bud.
movie because Bud-
Matthew —
1/2
dy was an amazing actor and be-
cause they did not use any
Nathan —
special effects. Buddy actually
— Matthew and
shot the hoops!
Nathan Greenberg
PHOTO BY ANDREW COO PER
'Conspiracy Theory'
'Spawn'