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"Sometimes I have to step
away," he said. "There are just
so many heros you meet in life. I
guess I get to meet some of the
greatest when they're going to
die."
Or, as Lea Wiss said, "I am so
grateful to God to have had that
one, small experience with a per-
son. I just want people to feel
they are dying whole. And as a
contact to religion, you have to
keep out of your own way to let
God's grace shine through."
Hospice nurse Beverly Math-
eson has just returned from a shi-
va call. She has many times
talked to her patient families
about sitting shiva and other
Jewish customs. Matheson is
Methodist. She believes, though,
that coming to hospice was a call-
ing.
She took a $15,000 pay cut at
a job one mile from her home to
come work for Hospice of Michi-
gan.
"I got a call from a patient in
the middle of the night," she said.
'We talked through the night,
and when we were through, I de-
cided it was a calling from God.
I knew it was time to leave. Now,
Pm working more hours, making
less money. I've never been hap-
pier."
She says that her family trees
have her descended from an
Irish king, who married Jewish
royalty. She's worked for years
in and out of the Jewish com-
munity as a private nurse. "And
`Rabbi Bunny' says I 'know more
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• Hospice patients have an
illness causing limited-life
expectancy.
• They choose to have care
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• Most insurers, including
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about Judaism than most
Jews."'
"Jewish hospice has been a
wonderful experience, under-
standing the culture, what is
needed," she said. "I understand
the family of a Jewish home. I
walk in the home and find out
what they want done. This is
their experience, not mine. I
want it to go as well as it can in
a positive direction. I've become
part of the family for that time."
Few cities have a full-service
Jewish hospice like Michigan.
Hospice of Michigan Medical Di-
rector Dr. John Finn says Jew-
ish patients have been
underserved for years.
"Say the word 'hospice,"' he
said, "and you think of Christian
roots and Christian connotations.
Maybe the laying on of hands.
But largely, hospice has this
connotations as being white and
middle class. It's important that
Jews and other faiths be able to
experience hospice through their
own faith."
Dr. Finn and Rabbi Freedman
are helping to set up a hospice
program in Israel's Central
Galilee region. They have visit-
ed the area and have had Israeli
physicians visit them here in De-
troit. The effort is part of Fed-
eration's Partnership 2000, a
cultural, economic and social ex-
change program.
"Hospice care is just so very in-
timate," said Lois Armstrong, ex-
ecutive vice president of the
Hospice of Michigan. "It was im-
portant for us to realize that Jew-
ish homes have unique
characteristics."
In the home of Lew and Gert
Honigman, a hospice aid comes
in to clean Gert, change her bed-
ding and even get her out of bed.
A nurse comes in once a week,
and a social worker is a regular
visitor. Hospice, Lew said, is sup-
posed to be about dying. But it's
hospice that he credits with keep-
ing his wife alive and the two of
them together.
"I'm grateful to hospice, I'm
grateful to Rabbi Freedman," he
says. "I still believe in God and
Judaism. Hospice has been like
some form of angel to me. But it's
difficult. To see her laying there.
I sit here some days and cry."
A little placard nearby says,
"Our Father, Our King, send in
a perfect healing to the sick
among thy people."
Lew looks at Gert.
'We've been together for -58-
years. In 1994 when she got sick,
she was a wonderful wife. She is
still my wonderful wife."
❑
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