COMPLAISANT
is
FALL!
straight A's, learning should
be inherently rewarding. Brib-
ing children to do well scho-
lastically strips them of a
sense of achievement and
panders to their greed. It can
also set up a frustrating sys-
tem in a home where a child
of average intelligence works
hard for C's and a bright
child, who studies little, easi-
ly earns top marks. -
Avoid linking an allowance
to chores. One mother tells of
her frustrating experience
when she tied her 9-year-old
daughter's allowance to tak-
ing on more responsibility
around the house. "I found
my resentment building when
the chores weren't done," she
explains. "Finally, my daugh-
ter said, 'Listen, I'm not real-
ly interested in money, so why
should I do the chores?' " The
allowance was put on hold,
but not the chores.
Establish a specific time
for handing out an allowance
and stick to it. Children, like
adults, spend most of their
money on weekends, so distri-
bute allowances on a Sunday
or Monday. Giving them
funds early in the week allows
them to think about how
they'll spend it and teaches
them to wait for what they
want. If they run out of
money and ask for more
before the week is over, don't
cave in unless circumstances
warrant it. Barring dire
straits, refuse an advance —
it's a relatively simple way for
the young to learn how to
manage money.
Define the purpose of an
allowance. In some homes,
children may spend it as they
please; in others, they have to
use at least part of it for
lunch money. The variations
are endless. An allowance
should be increased yearly
because kids' needs grow as
they do, and inflation will cut
into their buying power.
Paying For Extra Jobs
In addition to a weekly
allowance, some parents urge
their children to work in order
to earn extra money and en-
joy the satisfaction of having
done so.
"It's important to connect
the _idea of work and fulfill-
ment," says Carol S., the mo-
ther of two teen-age daugh-
ters. "It's also a reality that
work supplies the money that
sustains our needs and our
wants. Children, like adults,
don't like asking for money,
so there is nothing wrong
with encouraging them to be
financially independent. But
while I feel strongly that
children should learn how to
handle money responsibly, I
also believe they shouldn't let
it consume their lives."
When children are too
young to work outside the
home, paying them to do
chores they aren't regularly
responsible for is a fair way
for them to earn supplemen-
tal funds. Whether they clean
the garage, weed the lawn or
shovel snow from the drive-
way, parents and children
should agree in advance upon
what the job entails and what
will be paid. This is the
genesis of understanding the
money-to-labor ratio. But
don't go overboard or kids
will expect to be paid for
everything they do!
Pay young children by the
job, not by the hour. They
find it difficult to relate a
chore to time but can relate
it to money. Also, paying by
the hour penalizes the effi-
cient child and rewards the
pokey one. Evaluate job per-
formance, keeping expecta-
tions as high as the children's
abilities will allow. When the
work is done well, lavish
children with praise, which
promotes pride in accomplish-
ment.
Family Finances
As children get older, they
need to understand the fami-
ly's lifestyle is commensurate
with its means. This may
make it easier for a high
school freshman to accept the
fact that his parents can't af-
ford the $80 sneakers "all the
other kids are wearing." It
might even encourage him to
work after school to earn the
extra money needed for the
sneakers. Children of prosper-
ous parents should also learn
the dollars they spend are the
result of a great deal of effort.
Don't hide money problems
from youngsters. Kids are
sensitive to stress in the fami-
ly. Often they become tense
and frightened, frequently
imagining far worse fates for
themselves and their parents
than a temporary shortage of
cash. Neil K., an investment
advisor, believes money mat-
ters should be a part of din-
ner conversations, along with
world affairs and what's hap-
pening in school.
Lump Sum Gifts
When children receive a
substantial cash gift, a deci-
sion should be made as to its
dispersal. "Don't put large
sums of money in the hands
of children — even children
over 21," warns a financial
planner and father of five. "I
have found that in most
cases, large sums are com-
pletely dissipated within
seven years:'
Instead, he advises parents
to take their children to the
bank to open a savings ac-
count. "By using the gift as
seed money for an interest-
bearing account, you're in-
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