V.r.t.7777 - 7
r.
your opinion. Move your dial. Right speak explicitly on the need in
dispensing advice on "Sexually listen to her." (Dr. Ruth thought next to me on Sunday nights is a society."
Speaking," her immensely popular that was particularly apt.)
That felt need has steered Dr.
• About Purim: "Vashti knew station with classical music."
Sunday night radio program.
.Westheimer into very specific direc-
Dr.
Westheimer
was
not
always
But there: was little time for about sex. She refused to sleep with so outspoken. She confessed that if tions. One of these is a definite sense
conversation. A regular-sized lady Ahasuerus when he was drunk and someone had told her when she ar- of the kinds of questions she will an-
poked her head in at the door and might beat her. Vashti should be rived in the United States ,30 years swer and the kind of advice she
motioned the ,Munchkiri-like figure celebrated, not only Esther."
should give. And contrary to the im-
• "The Song of Songs, the most ago that she would be 'saying the preision that her attitude toward sex
into the next robin, and Within a feW
things she does on national radio
minutes was introducing her to an sensual book of the Bible, is read on
and television, she would have is libertine — an impression that is
Friday
night,
the
night
when
it
is
a
audience of 500 people who had
bolstered by Dr. Westheimer's opin-
laughed at him.
mitzvah to have sex."
come to spend "An Evening With Dr.
ion that she is in favor of "anything
The
daughter
of
Orthodox
Jews
• "The sages were wise. They
Ruth."
living in Frankfurt, Germany, she that two consulting adults do in the
(On March', 24 ,Dr. Westheimer knew that a woman's sexual satis- was sent to an orphanage in Switzer- privacy' of their bedroom, living
was in Troy for two lectures spon- faction affects the whole household."
she said,
room or kitchen floor,"
• "The ancients knew about con- land to ride out the Hitler, years. She . "Pin rather old fashioned and a
.sored by the Troy. „P, Ublic . Schools
traception. The Bible does not say never saw her parents again and as= square. I'm against the threesomes
adult and community education de-
sumes that they were killed in a
that sex is only for procreation."
and group sex and open marriage.
partnient.)
• "The 12 days of abstinence concentration camp.
German-born (1928), Israeli
They don't work."
In
1945,
Ruth
Karola
Siegel
bred, a former kindergarten teacher, during and after menstruation (as
Then what is a healthy attitude
emigrated to Israel, worked on a
Sorbonne graduate and member of required by Jewish law) can be ex- kibbutz, married and divorced, suf- toward sex?
the Haganah; a Ph.D. from Colum- citing."
"I think we took 'the first step
• "We have to stand up and not fered leg wounds in a shelling and tonight," she said, "by sitting around
bia; an M.A. in sociology from the
traveled
to
Paris,
where
she
earned
New School for Social Research; ad- permit the stories about Jewish
a degree in psychology at the Sor- and talking openly, so that people
junct associate professor in the women being interested only in sex
Human Sexuality Teaching Program before marriage. There is no dif-
at New York Hospital-Cornell Medi- ference between a Jewish woman
cal Center; consultant at NYU- and, say, an Italian woman."'
• Neither, according to Dr.
Bellevue Hospital Medical Center,
Westheimer,
do Jewish men have
Division of Geriatric Medicine,
member of the New York Academy unique sexual problems. "They are
of Medicine and a privately- the same as everyone else."
• "I think we should bring back
practicing psychotherapist iii Man-
the
institutions
of matchmaking. We
hattan: Dr. Ruth Westheimer, a.k.a.
Jews don't do enough to be really ef-
• . "Grandma Freud."
She was, she told the crowd, fective with getting people together.
standing on a "bar mitzvah box" to When all of this is over, when I'm
reach the microphone so she could not going to be Dr. Ruth anymore, I
deliver her talk on "Sexuality and really would like to do something
the Jewish Tradition," a potpourri of about matchmaking. The old tradi-
anecdotes, opinions and (of course) tion of matchmaking should be
explicit advice to the curious, reinstated."
But there are some so-called
perplexed or sexually malfunction-
traditional attitudes that should be
ing.
Dr. Westheimer's talk was a done away with, according to Dr. bonne, married again and had her will see that if they have a problem,
Westheimer, one of them being the
there is help available. And by talk-
somewhat more formal version of idea that elderly people are not or daughter, Miriam.
ing about things explicitly, the way
her radio show, except that its orien-
In
1956,
again
divorced,
she
should not be interested in sex.
we talk about diet. We in this coun-
tation, in keeping with the character
"I do sex therapy with people took Miriam to the United States, try talk about bathroom habits. A
of the audience, had a Jewish flavor.
and
within
three
years
had
earned
a
over 65," she said. "I do believe, for
Some samples:
master's degree at the New School physician is going to ask, 'How is
people
in
nursing
homes,
that
there
your bathroom habit? How is your
• "It is perfectly permissible for has to be some arrangement for dat- for Social Research.
bowel movement; everything. But we
us Jews to talk about these matters
There,
she
became
involved
in
rooms. There should be a* room
ing
are not training physicians to ask
(sex) explicitly." The Bible, the with a fireplace and a television and the Planned Parenthood program.
Torah and the Mishnah specify the something to drink and a sign out-
"When I worked in Planned about sexual life."
Furthermore, "One cannot do
necessity for frank discussion.
side — 'Do Not Disturb' — so that Parenthood," she said, "I very fast
• "The Jewish husband has people can go in there and neck and decided that this is a very good pro- therapy on the air. All I do is edu-
three obligatons, promised under, the pet and actually have sex."
fession for me to go into. I had been cate and give some general advice.
Really, all people want is mental af-
chuppah: to provide food, shelter and
To those who find her explicit- in public health. I wasn't dealing fir/nation." And her success, she
sexual gratification."
ness offensive, and feel that "Sexu- with human sexuality. What has says, "is not just because I can talk.
• "The sages were so smart.
ally Speaking" should not be broad- happened now is a combination of
Continued on next page
They said that if a man marries a
cast, Dr. Westheimer says, "I respect my being well trained and willing to
short wife • he should bend down and
—
"I think we should bring back
the institution of matchmaking.
•We Jews don't do enough
to be really effective with getting
people together."
,
,