Friday,.February 22, 1946
The Family and the Child
Parents' Example is Guide
From Infancy to Maturity
Social Service Worker Analyzes Child Mind, Tells How to
Meet Problems; Declares Family Life
Meets Vital Needs
By DAVID WINEMAN
Jewish Social Service Bureau of the Jewish Welfare Federation
The family as a way of life is one of the most ancient
customs amongst men. Wherever groups of human beings
are found, the faMily is found. This' is true in the most priini-
five of societies, as well as in the most advanced, and under
all forms of political rule. Obviously the family must meet
'some vital human needs; and those needs can be observed
in any child as it grows from
infancy to adulthood.
Human beings are born with
the. need for protection. Each in-
fant, therefore, has thousands of
experiences in connection with
•being cared for and protected.
The child gradually begins to ob-
serve, understand and desire all
these services which the parents
performs. He comes to believe
that being protected and cared
for is the same as being loved.
Child Needs Security
By the time a child is five, he
can eat without help, dress him-
self, open and close doors and
communicate with others through
speech, and achieving independ-
ence in many other ways. But
such a child still needs the pres-
ence of his parents to do these
things well and continuously. If
mother leaves Bobby for any ap-
preciable length of time, he is
apt to revert to eating like an
infant. He may use baby talk in-
stead of five-year-old language.
This shows that mother's just
being on the spot means some-
thing to Bobby. There is a word
for it: security. The family is the
-first and only place that the
growing child has the two im-
portant experiences of love and
security.
People, however, don't only
love each other; sometimes they
become extremely angry, so
angry that we s _ peak of hate.
,_It's a commonplace saying that:
"gave and hate are not very far
• part." The behavior of young
children illustrates this clearly.
A child of four who loves his
mother dearly, hates her when
he can't have his fifth piece of
bread and jam. Who has not seen
a child of this age strike his
mother with all his strength when
restrained from carrying out
some childish whim? A child does
this for the important reason that
it believes that being loved means
that it can do or have anything
it wants. When curbed, its love
turns to rage. This rage is as
strong as the love it replaces. .
It is the task of the parents to
modify this savage reaction to
unsatisfied. wishes in order to
equip the child for civilized liv-
ing with other human beings.
One of the most important roles
that parents play is that of act-
ing as models for the child to
imitate.
Helping Child to GroUT Up
Little children have an almost
unbelievable yearning-• to be
grown-up. They reveal this in
many of their games in. Which
they imitate with perfect ser-
iousness and detail the behavior
of their- parents. "Let's play
house" is the prelude to many of
the most exciting and satisfying
hours - of a youngster's life. The
wise parent understands how to
manipulate this powerful drive
to be an adult in - the education
of his child into the - habits of
civilization.
Such simple things as giving
Bobby, aged four, a -shirt or a
hat like his dad's, can become
an important tool in overcoming
Bobby's infantile reactions. First,
it brings. closer to reality the
dream locked up in his mind that
some day he'll be "just like
daddy." Then, when he slugs his
mother for that fifth piece of
bread—as he's sure to do, even
with- the little hat and shirt like
dad's—it is effective to tell him,
"see, you want to be just like
your father and you have a.hat
like his, a shirt like his, but you
don't act the way he does, you
act like a spoiled little baby." In
performing these three tasks—
providing the child with protec-
tion, granting him love and secur-
ity and using the parental rela 7-
tionship to offer the child the
correct image • of civilized behav-
Page Twenty-one
THE JEWIS1-1 NEWS
ior—the family exists as the
greatest single influence in main-
taining the standards of civilized
society.
The value of family living,
however, does not stop abruptly
after the child has taken on the
cloak of civilization. We have
seen Bobby at the crucial infan-
tile period when the foundations
of his personality were being
laid. Let us observe him at an-
other point of crisis—adolescence.
He is now sixteen. He isn't sure
any more whether he is a grown-
up or whether he is a child.. hi
fact, he is not very certain about
anything. Sometimes he sees him-
self as an engineer, a doctor or
a lawyer; then as an adventurer,
or a millionaire playboy who
never has to work for a living.
His moods vary from jubilant
elation to brooding despair. -
Probk%, of Adolescence
Bobby feels that he can come
home at midnight but his folks
insist upon. 10. He insists that
his "dates" are strictly his busi-
ness. There is a matter of driv-
ing his father's car. Gradually,
these conflicts are straightened
out. It is soon conceded that
Bobby is old enough to have the
car occasionally, and that he can
come home the odd time at 11.
What is happening is that Bob-
by is slowly pushing his way into
adulthood. It is in his parents'
eyes that he first feels the need
to establish his independence. The
parents must judge how much
independence Bobby can digest.
They must constructively help
him to complete the job. Then
he will meet the outside world
with confidence and optimism.
Wartime Problems
Dramatic instances of the deep
needs of young children for fam-
ily life was revealed during the
war. During the severe bombing
of London, for example, many
mothers and children had to be
evacuated, sometimes separated
for as long as two or three years.
Many of the children made up
totally imaginary fathers whom
they insisted were real. This oc-
curred even with children who'
had no conscious recollection of
their fathers. Just as a - hungry
man dreams of food, so these
children were manufacturing day
dreams through which they ob-
tained What they needed.
Jewish Social Service Bureau
Sometimes a family encounters
a breakdown. Since'family prob-
lems have a- way of expanding
rapidly in the absence- of efforts
to overcome them, the social
worker is in a much more effect-
ive position the earlier he is
called upon. Social- workers are
aware of the common, feeling in
the community that only poor
people go to social service agen-
cies and that the Only problems
they deal with are in under-priv-
ileged homes. Statistics of the
Sgt. Nathan Kusnit Back.
Will Study Journalism r
Pfc. Cantor Back;
Won Bronze Star
Sgt. Nathan Kusnit, son of Mr.
and Mrs. Abraham Kusnit of 2334
Richton, has been discharged
from the Army Signal Corps aft-
er being in ac-
tive service
since Novem-
ber, 1942. He
served for two
years in the- Pa-
cific and partici-
pated in the
landings on
New Guinea,
Leyte, Luzon
and Tokyo.
Sgt. Kusnit
H i s- brother,
Louis, is in the Navy and is sta-
tioned at Jacksonville, Fla.
Both were graduated from Celt,
tral High School.
Sgt. K.usnit will enter the Uni-
Ve'rSity of Missouri in September
and will major in journalism,
Pfc. Herbert Cantar, son of
Mr. and Mrs.. Morris Cantor of
3005 Chicago Blvd., • has been
honorably discharged from the
army after two and a half years
of service. He had distinguished
himself in combat duty with the
49th Armored Infantry , and on
March 5, - 1945, received the
Bronze Star medal. for" heroism
and meritorious service: Later
he also waa awarded the - Good
Conduct Medal. -
After V-E Day, Pfc. Cantor
was attached' to: the AMA: and
received commendations frail' his
superior officers for his fine work
as administrator in a small town
in Germany. -
He- PIans to resume- his studies
soon at the University of Mich-
igan.
Iwrey Back From Leyte
Pfc. Sol /w-
rey, son of Mr.
and Mrs. David
Iwrey of Burlin-
game Ave., has
returned from
the Leyte Is-
lands. After
spending his 30-,
day furlough at
home with his
parents, he re-
Sol Iwrey
turned to Fort
Sheridan III., for further orders.
Cpl. Novograd Discharged;
Asks Friends Contact Him
.
Cpl. Nathan Novograd was
discharged from the AAF on Feb.
16. He had served over three and
a half years in the army and was
delayed in his discharge because
of the AAF separation centers be-
ing closed and he had to be sep-
arated from the ground force
separation center at Fort Sheri-
dan, Ill. He would like his many
friends to contact him at his
home, 1950 Oakman Blvd., TO.
6-8908.
I
Discharged from Navy
The following have been dis-
charged recently from the U. S.
Naval Personnel Separation Cen-
ter at Great Lakes, Ill.:
Ordnance Captain Joins
Grand River Chevrolet
As Service Manager
Saul H. Rose, president of the
Grand RiVer: chevrolet Co. at
5100 Grand River, announces the
appointment of Russell Meals as
service manager. t- "
Meals joins the
"M
organization aft-
er four and one,.
half years in the
Army as a cap-
ai n in Ord-
nance. He was .
assigned to the
Caribbean D e -
fense . Command
in November
1941 to establish Russell Meals
and maintain vehicle supply and
maintenance shops. This en-
tailed rebuilding , and condition-
ing motor vehicles for- the West
Indies and South American area&
- Capt. Meals received a letter
of commendation from • the Cora-
mandip.,g General of Army Serv-
-
ice Farces for hiS work.
P`reviatis :to his entry into the
service he was mechanical en-
gineer for the International Har-
vester' Co. in Chicago. He is a
graduate mechanical engineer
from the University of Missouri
and a member of the American
Society of Mechanical Engineers
and the Society of Automotive
Engineers.
In the short time that he has
been with Grand River Chevro-
let Co. he has raised the stand-
ards of quality of the mechanical
force through a series of training
sessions.
-
Jewish Social Service Bureau of
Detroit shoce- that only about 10
per cent of the families dealt
with receive financial assistance.
Social work has expanded its
horizons past the dollar sign as
it has progressively recognized
the fact that economic distress is
only a single factor in the origin
of family disturbances.
(Council of Orthodox Rabbies)
Has Approved of
Dr. Louis E. Heideman has re-
turned from active duty as cap-
tain with the U. S. Army and
has reopened of-
fices at 1.2.710
Dexter.
Dr. Heideman
reported for
duty in July,
1942, and served
with the 18th
Field Hospital
in the southern
part of Iran and
India. -
He and Mrs.Capt. Heideman
Heideman at present are residing .
at 2676 Monterey.
Morris Wexler Returns
Morris Wexler, son of Mr. and
Mrs. Edward
Wexler of 1524
Taylor, has re-
turned to the U.
S. from overseas
service. He was
welcomed home
by family and
friends after
spending the
past t w o years
with the army
M. Wexler
Overseas.
LA. SALLE
WINDOW SHADE CO.
Has Moved from 8625 Linwood
Across the Street to
8642 LINWOOD
Phone TY. 5-1230
For The Same Superior
Workmanship
Materials — Service
Ten Quality Drug Stores
•
Fisher Building
MAdison 5384
9101 Linwood at Rochester
TYler 4 - 8465
191 8 4 Grand Rivet
Rosedale. Park
REdford 6900
Twelfth at Atkinson
TOwnsend 8-4200
McNichols at Third
UNiversity 1-1311
David Whitney
RAndolph 0540
337 fisher Road
Gross. Pointe
Niagara 3453
15324 E. Jefferson
Gees:* Point. Pads
LEnox 2580
19186 Livernois Ave. near
Seven Mile Road
UNiversity 3 4237
-
Rosenberg's Kosher
Catering Co.
STRICTLY KOSHER-- CATERERS
Serving Detroit
Formerly Pereira's
You Save Buying All
Your Drug Needs Here
Many would go to
store but Schettler's
prescriptions.
no other
for their
They just won't
substitute for Schettler's
dependability.
have a
find it economy to
at Schettler's for as many
Things as possible. You are not
Many also
shop
•
McNichols at Hartw.41
UNiversity 4-3434
asked to buy more than you
want, or things you don't need,
so money is aotuaRy saved.
PROFESSIONAL PHARMACY FOR OVER FIFTY YEARS
As One of the 3
•
Dr. L E. Heideman Returns;
Opens Offices.on
. Dexter
ber, 1943, served as comptroller
of the Zionist Organization of
America, was named financial
consultant to the organization.
Vaad Harabonim of Detroit
v....N. sr. .1..
Edward. L Moser, son of Mr.
and Mrs. Louis Moser of Taylor
Ave., whey recently returned
f r o i i. overseas
duty and was
disc harged on
Jan. 5, will be
married to Miss
Hannah Stupak,
daughter of Mr.
and Mrs. Phillip
Stupak of Waco,
Tex., in Waco,
on 1Vlarch .3.
The couple met
E. I. Moser while the De-
Aroit serviceman was stationed at
Camp Hood, Tex., in 1943.
Mr. Moser served .1.Vith the
Third Army in Netrinandy, Lux-
embourg, and Central Europe.
Miss Stupak is a graduate of
Texas State College for Women
and is chief dietician at Pravid-
ence Hospital in Waco.
Lt. (jg) Isadore Katz, 11710
Dexter.
SOM 2/c Sol. Koenigsberg (N),
2636 Pasadena.
S 1/c Paul M. Lebovitz, 2205 W.
Philadelphia.
Sgt. Rothschild Returns
Y 2/c Morris Simon, 2997 Col-
lingwood.
Sgt. Phil Rothschild recently
Lt. Howard M. Sherman, 2939
has returned from the service
Calvert.
and is now residing at the home
of his mother, 637 W. Robinwood.
Levairy Named Financial
He was discharged from Ft.
Consultant to_the ZOA
WASHINGTON, D. C. — Zvi Sheridan, Ill., where he was a
Levavy, who until his. entry into member of the public relations
the U. S. armed services in Octo- staff.
Al Rosenberg Is Proud to Announce That the
TY. 4-9490
Edward Moser to Wed
Texas Girt on Mar.. 3
1