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CLIFTON AVENUE - CINCINNATI 20, OHIO
and The Legal Chronicle
VOL. 44, NO. 37
A
DETROIT, MICHIGAN. FRIDAY. SEPTEMBER II.
'fear's Greetings to All
PLAIN TALK
MUEHLIG 8
LANPHEAR
Hardware
Happy Ness' Year to All!
by AL SEGAL
PHONE 2-3277
mit (It.
ing days after he has suffered congregations
most of his adult life, as many a rabbi has had
to do.
is-
.1 Happy Ness' Year to All
QUALITY
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PHONE 4014
N A ItItnIt, M
I
Le Shono Tovo Tikosevu
Prekete's
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Home Made 'ere Cream E4 Candies
Beer—Wine
The Best Meals in the City
109 S. MAIN ST.
ANN ARBOR, MI•II
Rosh Hashonah Greetings to All!
Francisco b
Boyce Photo Co.
723 N. University
Phone 4514
Yes, a rabbi at least should have enough to
bury him after it's all over and he is at last
allowed to seek the serenity of his grave. His
grave must be a happy end for a rabbi or
minister who has been like Prometheus upon
whose vitals the vultures fed as he lay chained
on Mt. Caucasus through many years. He is
the one who stole fire from heaven in order to
confer it as a blessing upon man and for that
he was punished by the vultures feeding on his
vitals.
All this makes me dreadfully mindful of how
narrowly I myself escaped being a rabbi. At
the end of my second year in the Hebrew Union
College the authorities decided that Judaism
might be more kindly served if I did not return
to their seminary—a conclusion creitable both
to their foresight and their compassion.
Now, well along in life—it's much better than
I like to think—I let myself fall into solemn
moments in which I consider how much happier
I am as a columnist than I would have been as
a rabbi. On those occasions my errant fancy
takes hold of me and I become Rabbi Segal
of K. K. Anshe Giborim Temple who is in his
study, deep in his Sabbath sermon, when his
wife intrudes with an interruption.
She has bought a new red hat . . . "What do
you think of it?" she asks.
"My dear," Rabbi Segal replies, "did you have
to come bursting into my sermon with this new
hat at this moment? Don't you ever stop to
consider? I may be in the very midst of a
thought . . . and come bursting in with a hat
. . . A red hat, besides!"
"And what's the matter with a red hat?" she
asks. "I think it's very lovely."
"Don't you ever stop to think, my dear? You
wearing it red hat! You, the rabbi's wife wearing
it red hat! Don't you realize the challenge that's
in a red hat? A red hat is far too conspicuous
and advertises to every woman in the congre-
gation that you are wearing a new hat."
' "So what? I'll wear what I please. I'm not
going to let my life be regulated by those . . .
those harpies."
Ann Arbor, Mich
"Shush, shush, my dear, not so loud" . . .
Rabbi Sega: pulls down the windows . . . "We've
got to be careful. You know what they'll say.
They'll say you have bought another new hat
at their expense. It's hard enough getting along
with them even without flaunting a red hat at
Rosh Hashonah Greetings to A11 1.1
them. Did you have to get a red hat?"
Rabbi Segal recalls his recent sermon on "The
Wages of Sin." It practically divided the con-
gregation against him. All the most influential
members of the congregation said that wages
was nothing for a rabbi to mention. Rabbis
should keep off economic problems. Wages was
612 E. LIBERTY AVE.
for business men to worry about, not rabbis.
PHONE 2-3194
To be sure, none of the men of the con-
gregation actually had heard Rabbi Segal's ser-
Ann Arbor, Mich.
about it from their wives . . . "He preached
something on wages," their wives said.
When the matter was brought up at the next
meeting of the board, Rabbi Segal had protested:
"But, gentlemen, I spoke on the wages of sin.
It was perfectly harmless."
The president of the congregation replied that
anyway he shouldn't have mentioned sin . . "The
goyim may think you are reflecting on them
if you mention sin. Good will is our motto."
Rabbi Segal has all this in mind as he looks
at his wife's challenging new red hat . . . "Be-
sides," he says, "you look too good in that hat.
You know they can't tolerate the wife of the
rabbi looking any prettier than they."
He sighs almost regretfully as he regrets his
wife's slim figure. The years had treated her
kindly enough and left her still graceful. Her
slender figure had brought them only the envy
of members' wives who looked at their own
increasing girth and were distressed by invidious
comparisons.
It had been one affliction after another in
all the years of Rabbi Segal in his various con-
gregations . . . The time he was reprimanded
for his sermon against the slums . . . "Rabbi,
don't you know some of the best Gentiles own
the tenement houses?" . . . The time he served
cocktails in his house . . . "Rabbi, cocktails
are all right in their place—in a member's house"
. . . The time he came out in favor of electing
a decent Board of Education • . . "Rabbi, you
should be careful. You're making us too con-
spicous" . . . The time his (laughter appeared
in shorts at a tennis tournament . . . "Rabbi
Segal, we don't think a rabbi's (laughter should
show her legs in public" . . . The time he was
scolded for not being seen enough in the public
affairs of the community, such at Rotary Club
meetings . . . "Rabbi, don't you think it would
be better for the Jewish community if the rabbi
got around more?" . . . The time he was re-
buked for being too much in the public limelight
. . . "Rabbi Segal, it's to our best interests
that the rabbi shouldn't be too prominent in the
public. Please, just lay low" . . . The time he
took the trip to Europe . . . "He takes trips to
Europe. Do we take trips to Europe?"
Now his wife had bought this red hat. He was
getting along in his years and lie desired only
peace, but a red hat on his wife's head would
make more trouble . . . "Please, my dear, take
it back. Can't you buy a new black one that
nobody will notice?"
* *
.
Jacobsons
Ladies Apparel
Ann Arbor
Bedding Co.
Mattresses and Feat hers Renovated
Down Comfoners. Pillows, Mat-
tresses and Box Springs, Made
The Case of' the Red Hat"
Congregations vote that way, there will be
pensions for retired Reform rabbis hereafter.
I hope no congregation will vote against this.
It's all a matter of congregations being socially
decent. Anyway, it seems to me, a rabbi is
entitled to rest and comfort in his few remain-
TATE SUPPLEMENT
10c Single Copy; $3.00 Per Yea
1942
congregations of the Union of American Hebrew mon, since it was given on Saturday. They heard
311 SOUTH MAIN ST.
N
"
S
Thank goodness, I sigh, I am a columnist
instead of a rabbi. As a columnist I don't have
to meet the customers face to face, and I may
drink cocktails and my daughter could wear
shorts at tennis, if I had a daughter. And my
wife may safely wear a red hat.
Yes, rabbis are entitled to pensions at the
end of it all. The proposed pension plan pro-
vides that the congregation shall pay a small
percentage of the rabbi's salary into the pension
fund, the rabbi himself shall pay something to-
ward the fund and the Central Conference of
American Rabbis also will contribute. This is
all in line with the social justice that to Jews
always has been a peremptory mandate.
1001 Broadway
Phone 6652
Ann Arbor, Mich.
A Happy
and
Prosperous New Year
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ANN Alt lc , 11:,
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Rosh Hashonah Greetings
JOE'S SNAPPY SERVICE
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Ann Arbor, Mich.
,
Season's Greetings and Best Wishes
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RUG CLEANING
WORKS
1032 GREEN ST.
PHONE 8115
ANN A1111111:,
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THE QUARRY
Inc.
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Splints, Trusses, Hospital Supplies
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PHONE 2-3109
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out S. t•N IvEtt.sun.
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The Ann Arbor Press
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5703 - HAPPY NEW YEAR - 1942
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