… was in the Arb marveling at obese squirrels. "Jesse Jackson" - On the steps of the grad library, talking to Agnes Aleobua. Aleobua was cutting a fine figure in her Levi's Engineered Jeans and "Michigan…
… I spy with my little eye at the Diag among the drug dealers and protestors but Rolf, that son-of-a- Canadian-whore international student I had been trying to get even with for some time. He was…
…'s all the free stuff you can get. Jane: If you were invisible, what would you do? Matt: I would probably go to the Diag and hit protesters in the balls. I think that would be nice. How about you, Jane…
… time in the Arb. But I don't want to go there with anyone. I want to cuddle with the squirrels and run around in the buff. I could be Jane of the Arb. OK Matt, here's a doozy of a question for you. What…
… Associated Press. religion f' y RZ }ice. k, F. %' ALEXANDER HONKALA LMMINC [hRADE 01 Squirrel huggers SAM SINGER SAM'S ..B here's a reason I shy away from the squirrels in the Diag. It's not their unusual…
… squirrel-on-squirrel debauch- ery. The room was ravaged. Hidden under a blan- ket of empty shells, the carpet and the once-orderly food corner were barely recognizable. Other traces of foul play - from my…
… comforter to my keyboard - spread far and wide. Squirrel pellets, the last ves- tiges of the lavish banquet, had been peppered about the room. How they got in was unclear. The room, equipped with four walls…
… and a ceiling, had always appeared closed off to the outside world. What mattered was that they wouldn't be coming back. No squirrel in the right mind, I was told, would chance a break-in with the space…
… rectangular sheets of super glue. It may have looked like a war zone, but it was squirrel-proof, and we slept easy. Cut off, the invaders grew sloppier and more aggressive by the day. Worse, our presence in the…
… homework. It wasn't the most interesting research, but I think I found some answers. Did you know squirrels don't hibernate? It's the truth. Much like us, they spend their winters rela- tively inactive…
…, which typically take place in mid-to-late fall, so critical. A successful forag- ing season will strongly correlate with a squirrel's capacity to accumulate body fat during the winter. It's a survival…
… strategy, and in an urban ecosystem like Ann Arbor's where provisions are scarce, it's one that requires total optimization. Enter the Squirrel Club. Founded in 2002, the organization boasts a membership of…
… more than 350. It convenes weekly (in groups of about 50) during warm months and less often over the win- ter, to feed on-campus squirrel populations. I know what you're thinking, and you're right: the…
… act of feeding a squirrel, in-and-of itself, is harmless. The problem comes, however, when the process is streamlined - in this case, when fifty kids walk around campus every week showering squirrels…
… answer to all of the world's problems isn't a rally on the Diag or a march on City Hall, nor is it complaining or-writing a newspaper column or anything else so superficial for that matter. And since that…
…'m just being an asshole, you haven't been paying enough atten- tion. Not that I'd blame you. Hoard can be reached at j.ho@umich.edu. LETTER TO THE EDITOR iO Cdlunm st misunertad role, ben of Squirrel…
… Club To THE DAILY: Sam Singer's article about the Squirrel Club (Squirrel Huggers, 04/12/05) is thoroughly inac- curate. The first problem with his article is its numbers: He says that our meetings…
… average 50 attendants, which they do perhaps twice a year, but more normallyabout 10-15 people attend (and perhaps five in cold weather). This is noth- ing near the roving band of 50 squirrel…
…-feeding students Singer portrays. Numbers aside, the article misunderstands the University ecosystem and our club's purposes. All animals adapt to their surroundings when finding food. The squirrels on campus are…
… depen- dent on student garbage for food - who hasn't seen a squirrel rooting around a dumpster or trash can? Singer's point that squirrels fed by humans are in danger of lacking food during the winter is…
… unfounded, as trash is never absent from campus. However, the Squirrel Club does not like to see squirrels eating trash, and we instead supply the squirrels with a healthier alternative - unsalted peanuts and…
… sunflower seeds. Our efforts do not impact the squirrels' ability to survive: their well- nourished nature is shown by the much larger- than-average size of squirrels on campus. In a further effort for…
… squirrel welfare, we deal with a significant number of injured squirrels every year, forwarding them;on to the properly trained animal-rescue staff. Addi- tionally, club members are currently involved in an…
… effort to combat the epidemic of squir- rel mange on campus, which is a skin disease treatable with antibiotics. Singer asks the club to "think of the squirrels." We do so now and will continue to. Jason…
… air from drafting through the poorly insulated windows. The screens on the windows had gotten so bad that a squirrel managed to enter Fraumann's room, scratched him and woke mm up from a nap. "It was…
… Daily Staff Reporter For the 3 to 7 percent of students diag- nosed with Attention Deficit Hyperac- tivity Disorder, stimulants like Ritalin or Adderall may mean the difference between success and…
… head from scratching itself. A squirrel disease expert has diag- nosed the creature with notoedric mange, a condition where mites bury themselves under the squirrel's skin, causing all of its fur to fall…
… fur) has been taken from it by a terrible dis- ease. What does the squirrel do? It doesn't stagger around the Diag in the early winter months with its hair fall- ing out, eventually keeling over and…
…0 0 Weighing in The Statement columnists give their opinions on Ann Arbor's best Best Textbook Store Shaman Drum By Eileen Hengel / Daily Staff Writer Squirrel fashion Pena 1- 9-11 r Country…
… out. Usu- ally, squirrels with this disease die from exposure in the winter months. But this particular squirrel will live, 7 ou know spring has hit Ann Arbor when the ranks of the .;harmonica…
…-playing dudes out- side tlhe UGLi swell from one or two solitary shiverers to a whole drum- banging crew. Their Diag takeover is one of Ann Arbor's finest fair-weath- er hallmarks, and you'll appreciate it all…
… may be asking yourself, is a "badonkadonk" anyway? Con- however, because the winter months havL passed. It will become immune to the mite and grow all of its fur back. Yes! The squirrel's clothing (its…
… dying a pathetic, lonely, naked death. It perseveres through hardship. The squirrel fights, and one spring day, it wakes up and realizes it is going sensus definition pegs it as a woman's particularly…
… have to do with fashion? The diseased squirrel is sig- naling a change. School is ending, spring is here, and what else could that mean but rebirth? If you need reinven- tion or rejuvenation in your…
… season for change. Scared to bust out? Just think of yourself as a mang- ey squirrel with open wounds on top of your bald head. Ready for change now? Maybe this was just an excuse to talk about the…
… squirrel I saw the other day. Whatever, you can decide for yourself. The squirrel loves it. I love it. You love it. We all love it. - Faria can be reached at fjabbar@umich.edu worst-of-pop installment…
…2 - Tuesday, April 3, 2007 The Michigan Daily - michigandaily.com MUSTACHE LAUGHS Be very, very quiet - I'm hunting squirrel You know it's spring in Ann Arbor. when the sun comes out and the snow…
… melts away. You watch as April show- ers bring May flowers. And sometimes, something really odd happens that makes the entire depressing winter worthwhile. I was walking on the Diag last spring, enjoying…
… assembly of squirrels. "All right," I thought, "there's an image of pure generosity. Once done with his hard-won food, he's good enough to offer scrumptious charity to the ubiquitous squirrels." But then I…
… the fraternity Alpha Phi Alpha late last night. The probate serves to celebrate and announce to campus new members of the fraternity. At last night's event on the Diag, the pair's performance included…
… uncertain While Harvard, Princeton groups gain speed, 'U goes without ByJILLIAN BERMAN Daily StaffReporter The University has student groups for everyone from squirrel enthusiasts to jet engine connois…
…- seurs, but there's one population of students you won't find hand- ing out quarter sheets on the Diag - those who choose to remain celibate until marriage. While pro-abstinence groups at some of the…
… for president of the Squirrel Club. 8. Print lots of little colored pieces of paper with nothing on them and pass them out on the Diag. See if any- one notices the difference. 9. Abolish something. 10…
… short but quick. 3. Grow beard. 4. Start to read the news and hold opinions. S. Join the Squirrel Club. It's always a good idea to have your first few goals be relatively frivolous and/or unambitious…
… and smell it with- out looking silly. 15. Run for the president of my kids' school board, then dismantle it because school boards are plain annoying. There's always the Squirrel Club. You could be…
…. Run for president of the Squirrel Club. 8. Print lots of little colored pieces of paper with nothing on them and pass them out on the Diag. See if anyone notices the difference. 9. Abolish something. 10…
…. He is short but quick. 3. Grow a beard. 4. Start to read the news and hold opinions. 5. Join the Squirrel Club. It's always a good idea to have your first few goals be relatively frivolous and…
