November 29, 2001 (vol. 112, iss. 44) • Page Image 14
… mammal around. (Besides that preacher dude on the Diag. I'd take a squirrel over him any day.) I know that they bother you. Tell me that you don't have a Sarah strange story fea- Rubin turing a psycho…
… ==I -W V V V V UF 7U Daily - Weekend, etc. Magazine - 4B - The Michigan Daily - Weekend, etc. Magazine - Thursday, November 29, 2001 SQUIRRELS IN THE MIST The Michigan ELITE ENTERTAINMENT…
… of days that looked cold but weren 't, not to wear a sweater and my wool coat. So I'm frying, all hot and dis- gruntled, when out of the blue a rabid squirrel dives in front of me, in some suicidal…
… attempt for atten- tion. This is all the incentive I need to start my by-now-banal squirrel dia- tribe. Mali suggests that I make the whining into a column. And I can't tell if she's serious or if she just…
… wants to avoid the inevitable. Fran nods vehemently reaffirming my suspicion that the two are conspiring against me; I think that they think that a good ole' squirrel-bashing col- umn will extirpate my…
… angst, clear- ing my conversational horizon from stories about rodents who eat nuts. But I won't be satisfied until I achieve vengeance. Come on. Agree with me, here. Squirrels are the most terrible…
…- squirrel. You jC o haven't lived in , An Arbor long Flairenough if you haven't had at least one close-encounter-of-the- squirrel-kind. The most striking characteristic of the squirrels on campus is their…
… rela- tive size. I come from a nearby small town in Michigan, and our squirrel population isn't nearly as over- weight. The squirrels in my town live in trees. They jump and run on the phone wires and…
… all of the other typ- ical squirrel behavior that looks like it'd be fun to try if I was 3 inches tall. Here, in Ann Arbor, the squirrels are always on the ground. Why? Because they're freaking obese…
…. You have to do a double-take to see if it's a cat or a squirrel walking with you to class. They've lost their aero- dynamic powers and they're too fat to ascend, so they stagnate in the grass. This…