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April 13, 2022 - Image 5

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Wednesday, April 13, 2022 — 5
Arts
The Michigan Daily — michigandaily.com

‘Bend It Like Beckham’ isn’t a queer story, but it’s part of mine

Nothing is really ‘Straight Up’

OKAY, TIME FOR a confession.
Long before I began to unpack my

internalized misogyny and unchecked
ego, I was just another girl who clung
to wearing weird clothes and an inter-
est in sports in the name of being
“not like other girls.” Since then, I’ve
embraced how beautiful and complex
being a woman is, and how I can be
perfectly myself and similar to a lot
of other women — a truly lovely thing.
But before I could come to terms with
such a concept, I needed to uncover
the missing piece of myself that was
ardently telling me I was different and
could never fit in with the girls around
me. This, I would realize, was my

unrecognized Queerness.

When people ask me now about being

bisexual and whether it was something
I always knew about myself, I chuckle
because the answer is no, but I totally
should have. My journey to recogni-
tion required a series of key moments,
spurned on by passing touches, lin-
gering feelings in my stomach and
encountering a pivotal piece of media
at precisely the right time. For me, this
was “Bend It Like Beckham.”

It’s no secret that the film is a Queer

allegory, though not a Queer story. It
explicitly depicts Jessminder (Par-
minder Nagra, “The Blacklist”), or Jess
— a tomboy who is forbidden from play-
ing soccer (or football) because it isn’t
proper for a girl, according to her par-
ents — and implicitly depicts her secret
desire to be herself much in the same

way many experience Queerness. All
the while, she is encouraged to follow
her passion without inhibition by her
narrative foil, teammate and other half
of an incredibly homoerotic friendship,
Jules (Keira Knightley, “Anna Kar-
enina”). Ultimately, it was the undeni-
able chemistry between Jess and Jules,
from their shared passion for soccer
to their easy banter and mutual dis-
dain for boys, that made me realize
maybe my aching desire for a relation-
ship like theirs wasn’t based in friend-
ship — I already had plenty of valued,
close friendships with women — but
was instead fueled by something more
romantic.

There is plenty of analysis out there

that gets into the nitty gritty of just how
sapphic Jules and Jess’s relationship
really was, including the abundance of

lingering gazes and their Queer-coded
aesthetics (their hatred for bras isn’t
exactly subtle). From start to finish, it’s
glaringly obvious that the film is laced
with Queer-coded elements. There is
the character of Tony (Ameet Chana,
“Unhallowed Ground”) who explicitly
comes out as gay, as well as direct ref-
erences to Queerness, like when Jules
says, “Being a lesbian isn’t that big of a
deal.” In a moment of unchecked leg-
end behavior, Knightley even remarked
during an interview that Jules and Jess
should have ended up together and that
she wants a lesbian sequel.

So you can imagine young me’s dis-

appointment when the film decides to
run with a lukewarm romance between
Jess and her soccer coach, Joe (Jona-
than Rhys Meyers, “The Tudors”)
instead. (To this day … ew.) To the

film’s credit, it does put genuine effort
into building a developed relationship
in which both characters are vulner-
able with each other; Joe opens up
about his relationship with his father,
and Jess describes her relationship
with her parents and her insecurities.
Yet even during my first watch, I got
the sense that their relationship was
one of mutual emotional support, cer-
tainly, but not one with any romantic
chemistry. I felt betrayed by the forced
run to the airport scene at the end,
because Jess had never shown any seri-
ous interest in boys prior, and even if
the film didn’t depict Jess and Jules in
a romantic relationship, why would a
relationship with a man be the narra-
tive’s cathartic moment?

“WHAT IF I’M not gay?”
This may not be the first line of James

Sweeney’s feature film debut “Straight Up,”
but it may as well be. Todd (Sweeney, debut)
sits in a diner across from his friends, model
Meg (Dana Drori, “Freaky”) and compe-
tent gay Ryder (James Scully, “You”), trying
to convince them that he’s straight. In his
current rationalization, Todd is only gay
because everyone else deems him as such —
he embodies the idea of “gay,” therefore he
is. Desperate to not be alone, he believes that
giving heterosexuality a shot will magically
find him a partner, and it miraculously does
in the form of aspiring actress Rory (Katie
Findlay, “Man Seeking Woman”).

Let’s be clear — the relationship between

Todd and Rory is about as cisgender-het-
erosexual (cishet) as I am, which is to say:
not. On account of Todd’s intense hatred of
bodily fluids and Rory’s past sexual trauma,
sex plays no part in their connection; they
instead have hours-long conversations
about grammar and idioms, or they bond
over dinner and a weekly documentary. If
it weren’t for their deep emotional interde-
pendency, you could almost mistake them
as best friends who kiss sometimes. From
the outside, it seems a bit Queer, but is there
anything wrong with that?

Todd and Rory remind me of myself and

my previous partners. In fact, it was with
my most recent partner that I first watched
the movie. Snuggled up together in my bed
with the laptop resting above my waist,
we viewed the film as a cishet couple. We
laughed at Sweeney’s clever wordplay and
slick jokes, we held our breath during the
climactic break-up and we smiled sweetly

at the neat and joyful resolution. In essence,
we missed the entire point of the film.

Watching it now, one year of being single

and a tangled mess of gender and sexual-
ity, it’s impossible not to recognize that

my relationship faced the same dilemmas.
Long before I came out, the sexual pillar of
our relationship was crumbling; whether it
was the constant long-distance or our men-
tal states is anybody’s guess. The time we
spent together was experiential: We’d bake
treats, cook meals, watch movies, finish one
another’s sentences. I knew her idiosyncra-

sies and she knew mine — you could almost
mistake us for best friends who kissed
sometimes.

SARAH RAHMAN

Senior Arts Editor

M. DEITZ

Senior Arts Editor



2022 Juniors
2022 Juniors

Sydney Maria Czako
Lauren Elise Doyle
Steve Dunne
Eliza Joy Feinberg
Evan Ferry

Noah Baratz Gross
Gretchen Skye Heidebrink
Nameer Mahmood Hirschkind
Eric Wilson Huang
Christopher Lawrence Kolb

Olivia McMullan
Jonah Allen Nan
Jacob Bennett Nielsen
Oscar Matthew Nollette-Patulski
Hunter Michael Petz

Julia Rhiannon Plawker
Amelia Catherine Popowics
Allison Renee Sabb
Benjamin Charles Shuart
Nicole M. Tooley

Kylie Jean Schache
Grace Erin Tucker
Ally Rose Weingarden

2022 Seniors
2022 Seniors

Sarah Z. Abdelbaki
Sara Pearl Apelbaum
Athena Marie Apfel
Anuar Baisynov
Laurel Grace Baker
Justin Sebastian Ballard
Robert Alexander Banas
Hannah Marie Bartels
Joshua Stephan Bauman
Callie Morgan Beck
Bryn Lauren Bennett
Abigail Mary Biddix
Brandon Milo Block
Madelyn Claire Blum
Zack Lerner Blumberg
Katharine Margaret Boasberg
Nathaniel Livingston Bogardus
Sarah Rose Bonnet
Ari Samuel Bosse
Connor Douglas Bradbury
Sam J. Braden
William Michael Brody
Emily Jessica Buckley
Robert Ferdinand Buhring
Joshua Scott Burg
Taylor Robin Burman
Brennan Kendall Burrows
Peyton Rockwell Cahn
Andra Jin Campbell
Paige Marie Carpenter
Elizabeth Lauren Cetnar
Tuhin Chakraborty
Sabrina Chen
Shuyang Chen
Xinyu Chen
Linda D. Chiu
Madeline Irene Cohen
Morgan Elizabeth Cole
Kaitlyn Elizabeth Colyer
Gabriel Salvatore Consiglio
Daniel Patrick Cullen
Jessica Antoinette Czapla
Molly Irene Dahle
Robert Joseph Daniels
Ali Darwiche
Elizabeth Anne Davis
Cherish Dean

Matthew Thomas Dodge
Sydney Lucille Dusek
Rachel Elise Ellis
Sophia Rose Fortunato
Julia Rose Marie Freeman
Julia Jieyu Fu
Stephanie Nicole Ganzi
Julianna Forrest Garber
Matthew Gates
Stephanie Rose Gennusa
Lydia Marie Goff
Hannah Leah Gold
Claire Carey Goods
Noelle Lorita Gorka
Jesse Alexander Goulding
Priydarshini Ravi Gouthi
Josephine Kate Graham
Avery Harris Greenberg
Margot Grom-Mansencal
Kathleen Gu
Katie Ann Guyer
Natasha Hamid
Caroline Hannon
Saloni Haruray
John William Haviland
Brenna Grace Healy
Lauren Elizabeth Heitsenrether
Eleanor Howard Henry
Olivia Marie Hintz
Lena Margueritte Hoppe
Marley Hornewer
Jingyi Hu
Rachna Iyer
Nicole Sarah Jacobs
Abhinav Janappareddi
Sophia Janevic
Ryan Jansen
Mohamed Jawad-Makki
Amelia Anna Jelic
Cara Jhang
Julia Audrey Johnston
Ani Aileen Kalousdian
Delina Kamposh
Sanjana P. Kannikeswaran
Bella Karduck
Olivia Marie Kato

Olivia Brooke Katz
Olivia Grace Keating
Lindsay Ruth Keiser
David Keller
Teya Ahmad Khalil
Matthew Peter Kipp
Sarah Emily Klausner
Angelina Marie Knight
Akhil Venkatmani Kondepudi
Seongbae Kong
Emmaleigh Rose Krause
Madison Mila Krumins
Greta Elizabeth Kruse
Juliet Taylor Kunkel
Sophia Rose Kurnot
Ariella Eve Kushner
Oh Jun Kweon
Dylan Louis Landau
Jimmy Shui-Hung Lau
Sophie Manon Le Pottier
Estelle Nadell Leibowitz
Alexander Alekseevich Levashkevich
Ashley Michelle Levenson
Joshua Deyuan Li
Zhuoyi Li
Irisa Lico
Mia Grace Lindberg
Al Vicente Riano Lisboa
Jiachen Liu
Ross Henry Orgiefsky London
Hannah-Ruth Long
Jessica Lauren Lonsway
Ava Rose Lotsoff
Asia Emily Luboyeski
Tiernan Mackela
Haseeb Mahmood
Lindsey Marie Masterman
Reagan Louise McGinn
Ben McGraw
Margaret Johnston Michalowski
Teo D. Miklethun
Leonard D. Miller
Rachel Milner
Alyssa Marie Moore
Alexandra Grace Morgan
Noor Moughni
Jesse Lewis Munson

Antonina Rose Nedoss
Russell Charles Noble
Ciara Frances Nolan
Amy Nowack
Jacob Outwin
Mario Angelo Pallazola
Isabella Panse
Ewelina Papiez
Carmen Elizabeth Parkinson
Delia Rose Perillo
Matthew John Person
Tara Marilyn Petersen
Rafael Thomas Serra Pierry
Sarah Berit Pomerantz
Chloe Rena Porigow
Izabel Rene Powers
Joanna Qu
Celine Rajoulh
Samantha Ruth Ratner
Elena Rosaria Rauch
Karthik Ravi
Emma C. Reck
Devon Noel Regal
Sophia Marie Rightmer
Lio Riley
Elizabeth Anne Rooney
Hadi H. Saab
Elayna Lauren Rose Sabelhaus
Hayley Mara Sanders
Ami Sanghvi
Filip Saulean
Mia Jocelyn Schatz
Amanda Marie Schlecte
Adam William Schnepf
Reid William Schreck
Elizabeth Jane Schriner
Jacob Edward Schuman
Anna Schwartz
Luke Benjamin Schwartz
Julia Rose Sessions
Madhulika Sridevi Shastry
Caroline Jayne Shrock
Olivia Irene Siklich
Maya Juliana Simonte
Anna Mary Simpson
Jacob Sirhan
Tristan Thomas Sirls

Hannah Evelyn-Marie Sliwa
Maria Teresa Sobrino
Ashley Erin Starr
Jessica Steir
Noah Charles Streng
Alexander R. Takla
Amishi Taneja
Elanor Shim Tang
Drew Eric Tarnopol
Madeline Christine Taylor
Ethan Ariah Teich
Caroline M. Theuerkauf
Noah Charles Treutle
Alexandra E. Turfe
Ethan VanValkenburg
Chloe Elizabeth Walker
Alexander Aaron Walkon
Lisa Walsh
William Jialian Wang
Brooke Victoria Weichel
Tori Jessica Weingarten
Thomas Isaac Weinstein
Tommy Wiaduck
Elizabeth Anne Williamson
Henry Converse Wilmot
Sari Nicole Wise
Jack Robert Wisneski
Wroxanna Lorraine Work
Jonathan Szeto Xi
Bharath Yalavarthi
Tian Yeung
Sophia Yoon
Jason Zhang
Jialin Zhang
Brandon Zhu

Phi Beta Kappa
Phi Beta Kappa is the oldest and most widely recognized scholarly honorary society in America. Founded in 1776 at the College of William and Mary, it celebrates excel-
lence in the liberal arts and sciences. The UM chapter, Alpha of Michigan, was founded in 1907 and inducted its hundred and fourteenth class into membership on April
engagement. Membership as a junior is arguably the highest honor that an undergraduate in liberal arts and sciences can achieve. The Executive Committee of the Alpha
of Michigan Chapter of Phi Beta Kappa recognizes and congratulates these new members of this venerable society.

Read more at MichiganDaily.com

Read more at MichiganDaily.com

A conversation with my therapist

about my gender identity

Editor’s Note: The author of this contribu-

tion has requested anonymity for safety. In
accordance with our ethics policy (which can
be found in full in our bylaws), the Editor-in-
identity.w

today, I wonder if you maybe want to talk
about your gender identity a little bit?)

YEAH, ACTUALLY I do. I didn’t even

realize it, but I actually have been think-
ing about this a lot lately. So, yeah, let’s talk
about it.

Here’s where I’m at with the whole gen-

der thing: One of the reasons I first wanted
to go to therapy was because of some new
gender dysphoria I started feeling a year
or so ago. And after a lot of struggling and
wrestling with the concept and the feelings,
I feel like this semester I was finally more
confident in where I landed. Which is why
we haven’t talked about it yet. But lately, I
have been questioning again.

Basically, I thought I was nonbinary, like

yeah for sure I don’t feel super like a woman
but I also don’t have a penis, so like, what do
I do with that? And this semester I finally
just bit the bullet and started introducing
myself with they/she pronouns. And that felt

fine, I suppose.

But the problem is there are not a ton of

places halfway through a school year where
it makes sense to introduce yourself with
your pronouns. And just the whole concept

of sharing and defining pronouns, in gen-
eral, makes me squeamish. And I was not
about to announce my “new” identity to the
world. Because I still was not sure that those
were good words to use for me. So yeah,
everyone was basically still using she/her
pronouns for me because, unfortunately (?),
that is the most obvious assumption.

(Well, I actually think you look pretty

androgynous in my opinion.)

Thank you! Thank you! And it always

feels like such a compliment when people
don’t assume my gender! Which I suppose is
a confirmation of these nonbinary feelings.

ANONYMOUS CONTRIBUTOR

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