Because of you
Thank you for changing my dia-
pers when I was a baby to being
my biggest cheerleader growing
up. I never feel lonely because of
you. For saving me from drown-
ing in countless pools, fountains
and other near-death experiences
I’m sure I had. I always feel com-
fortable testing my boundaries
because of you. For downloading
my first iPod with all your music
and making me hip by introduc-
ing me to artists like Maroon 5 and
Eminem. I have incredible music
taste today because of you. For giv-
ing me food every day after school
when our mom started working. I
never went hungry because of you.
For keeping every secret I’ve ever
told you. I never have to deal with
my thoughts eating at me alone
because of you.
Thank you for teaching me right
AAKASH RAY
MiC Staff Writer
Understanding burn-out for BIPOC womxn
Read more at michigandaily.com
Design by Hibah Chughtai
This summer has held some of
the ugliest as well as the most radi-
cally beautiful moments of my life
thus far. In its entirety, this season
has taken it out of me. By it, I mean
my energy, my tears, my heartache
and my time. While I appreciated
all of the work I was doing while
trying to cope with living in a pan-
demic, I can’t say that I always did
it well. I have a habit of dropping off
the grid for periods of time, letting
myself drift into a hermetic state
and only popping back up after sev-
eral days. It is even harder for me
to name this as something that is a
symptom of larger problems rather
than a quirky flaw that I have. I get
burned out, and instead of dealing
with guilt or stress, I disappear.
Over the past few weeks, I have
had this conversation with multi-
ple friends who identify as womxn,
and there seems to be a recurring
pattern. We put so much pressure
on ourselves to be the best stu-
dents, look beautiful always, advo-
cate for ourselves, live as models
of what womxn should be, act as
supports for our friends and family
and thrive romantically. I am not
saying all of these equally affect
all womxn or that they encompass
all of our troubles, but I acknowl-
VICTORIA MINKA
MiC Staff Writer
edge that they’re deeply real. The
spinning plates of life are hard to
grapple with and contribute to this
burnout. When I say burnout, I am
referring to the World Health Orga-
nization’s definition, of a syndrome
of chronic workplace stress that
has not been well managed and has
led to energy depletion, exhaustion,
as well as other symptoms. Women
are more likely to experience burn-
out than their counterparts, par-
ticularly in the workplace. We hold
ourselves to the highest standards,
both at home and at work, and we
so often are not recognized for our
efforts. This is an exhausting cycle
to live within, and it is impossible
not to be tired from it. Womxn,
especially womxn who identify as
black, Indigenous and people of
color, hold themselves to a stan-
dard that is unattainable, but we
don’t know any other way to be. We
were taught to try to thrive with
breadcrumbs, tricked into believ-
ing there was only so much to go
around so we would have to settle
with less. We were made to believe
that by making ourselves smaller,
there would be ways for us to slip
between the cracks and make it
through. In reality, shaping our-
selves to the cisgender, white, het-
eropatriarchal system only means
erasing or drowning out aspects
of our cultures, histories and iden-
Design by Hibah Chughtai
from wrong when our parents
couldn’t. I learned early on not
to use words that can hurt other
people and the importance of fam-
ily because of you. For helping me
pass through every step of school
by proofreading my essays, pushing
me to think about my career and
giving me general life lessons when
they were most timely. I learned
to be a functional adult because of
you. For covering for me whenever
I needed support, whether that be
when my car broke down in the
middle of Ohio without our parents
knowing or when you invited me to
your apartment in Chicago and let
me get away from the noise of col-
lege. I always know the first per-
son I can call because of you. For
always dealing with our parents in
the most civil way and never saying
anything without precise calcula-
tion. I recognized the significance
of emotional intelligence because
of you.
I was raised by you and our
mom, although at very different
levels. While our mom bore the
responsibility of being an author-
ity figure in the household, you are
the one who could empathize with
me as my equal — who shares many
of the same childhood memories
that I vaguely remember. You take
all of what someone else might
perceive as my flaws and make
me feel comfortable with them.
You forgive me for not speaking
as much, knowing I enjoy time to
myself, but still somehow earnestly
push me to escape my bubble. You
respect my decisions, fears and
dreams no matter how irrational
or unplanned they may be, vowing
instead to work through them with
me. You stand as an equal no mat-
ter how much older and more suc-
cessful you become and never let
distance keep us apart.
All relationships change with
time, but I know you will always
tities. I think burnout in BIPOC
womxn has everything to do with
being told to change ourselves to fit
an oppressive system.
The first step in realizing there
is a problem is naming it. Nam-
ing that we suffer from burnout
gives us back our power. It lets us
recognize that we are human and
all of the effort and toil we put in
does place stress upon us. I found
that when I name my burnout and
take care of myself best is when
I am surrounded by womxn who
are strong enough to know when
to lean on others. They allow me
to share how I am doing with them
and affirm me in the direction I am
growing. By working together to
weave our own support networks
Read more at michigandaily.com
be my biggest role model. You
were the first person who taught
me self-awareness and showed
me disagreement is worthwhile
when combined with integrity and
respect. And I know you have many
more lessons you will teach me in
the coming years and beyond.
10
Thursday, August 13, 2020
The Michigan Daily — michigandaily.com
MICHIGAN IN COLOR
and lift each other up when we’ve
fallen, we can begin to change
the narrative around how we talk
about ourselves and the challenges
we face. Going into this upcom-
ing fall season, I will continue to
appreciate the wonderful...