Government officials, at both

the federal and state levels, have

requested that families “stay home,

save lives” to slow the spread of

COVID-19, and to protect themselves,

and those around them. Back in

March, Michigan Medicine displayed

a graphic showing how we can

flatten the curve (slow the spread

of COVID-19): if communities work

together to slow the spread of this

virus, the number of cases will

stretch out across a longer period

of time, allowing hospital beds to

accommodate more people. Staying

home and practicing social distancing

can be a way families across the U.S.

can help slow the spread of COVID-

19, but staying home is not the safest

reality for everyone.

On April 2nd, The Rising Majority

— a coalition of allied organizations

and movements formed in 2017

— hosted a virtual teach-in with

activists Angela Y. Davis and Naomi

Klein to discuss movement building

in the time of the coronavirus crisis.

Angela Davis discussed the gendered

violence of capitalism and how so

many survivors of abuse are not able

to retreat to a safe home during this

pandemic: “This whole idea of ‘staying

at home’ assumes we can retreat

to a safe, nurturing environment, a

refuge.”

After viewing this teach-in and

thinking about this insight from

Davis, I shifted my attention to

what staying home may look like for

survivors of abuse and violence in

unprotected conditions:

Violence
against
women
and

children is a public health crisis and

staying home to slow the spread of

COVID-19 has many impacts on those

who cannot go to safe homes.

The National Domestic Hotline

reported 951 calls between March 10

and 24 that mentioned COVID-19;

one caller from New York said her

abuser threw her out the front door

and kept their child after she woke up

because she was not feeling well. Life-

threatening situations like living in

abusive households place inexplicable

pain on survivors to take part in this

worldwide retreat to homes.

In Grand Rapids, Mich. alone,

domestic violence cases have spiked

48%, as reported by Kent County

Prosecutor’s Office and some of

the blame can be placed on the

coronavirus; a prosecutor of Kent

County voiced concerns of children

facing abuse being unable to reach out

to trusted adults for help like teachers

due to remote learning.

Furthermore, there are many

impacts on those who do not have

safe homes and those who may be

economically dependent on their

abusers; financial uncertainty for

some can prevent them from leaving

home — even outside of this pandemic

as cases have spiked during times of

economic crisis. The CEO of the

National Domestic Violence Hotline,

Katie Ray-Jones reported to TIME

magazine that the calls they have

received have ranged from “abusers

threatening to throw survivors out on

the streets so that (the survivors will)

get sick” to “(withholding) financial

and medical resources”.

Advocates
are
still
providing

resources for those experiencing

violence and abuse. As reported by

the director for the legal project at

two justice centers for New York’s

Sanctuary for Families — a shelter

that provides legal and counseling

services for women and their children

— “though New York shelters are

considered essential, many domestic

violence service providers are not

seeing as many clients because of the

virus and are moving their services

to online.” But hotlines are still open

and some states like Philadelphia

have set up online databases where

individuals can request protection

against their abusers.

Keep in mind that not everyone

has the ability to go to a safe home

nor remain there during this crisis

- staying home is a privilege. To

provide allyship to those you may

know who are living in unsafe spaces,

ask them how you can support

them in this time and provide

them with local resources in a safe

manner, so that their livelihood is

not compromised. Linked below is a

website that provides resources for

those experiencing homelessness,

those who identify as survivors and

those seeking support for domestic

and sexual abuse; these resources

have been combined by national

organizations
and
community

organizations.

If I stretch my memory as far back

as it’ll bend, I can remember the first

time I had to teach myself how to

breathe again. My parents had gone to

a fundraiser, leaving me alone with my

sister and my brother. I don’t remember

exactly why, but I remember I needed

to talk to my mom on the phone. For

whatever reason, maybe because they

thought I was too much of a mama’s

girl or maybe they wanted to mess with

me, my siblings wouldn’t let me call her.

Then there was this pressure on my

chest, a feeling that I can only compare

to someone taking a dull spoon and

carving out your heart, and I couldn’t

breathe anymore. I started sobbing

uncontrollably and begged them to let

me use the phone. I was maybe 7 or 8,

but the possibility that this might be the

last time I got to talk to my mother or

that something horrible would happen

if I didn’t hear her say she loved me

that night overtook me. My hands went

numb, and I’ll never forget sitting in my

room alone, desperately trying to coax

air back into my lungs.

There are so many little moments

like that from my childhood that my

family and I had chalked up to me being







, being sensitive, a crybaby,

but which read like undiagnosed

anxiety when I write them out. I

love my family so much, but I felt so

misunderstood. For so much of my life,

I internalized that view of myself —

that I was a crybaby, irrational, prone

to over-dramatic displays of emotion

for no reason — and for a long time,

it stopped me from developing any

security in my emotions. I am normally

the first to apologize, I let countless

makeup technicians and hairstylists

fully fuck up my face because I don’t

know how to speak up for myself, and

I tread so lightly around everyone’s

feelings because they must be more

valid. It wasn’t until I was much older

and I spoke to a therapist that I had the

language to describe what I was going

through. It was hard hearing that I

showed very classic signs of clinical

depression and anxiety, but for the first

time I could trust my feelings as being

real and valid and not just a creation

of my melodramatic mind. Most

importantly, they were something I

could control.

We all have these stories about our

lives we tell ourselves in our heads,

again and again, until they become our

reality. I never told my parents about any

of this, because being misunderstood

had become a core part of my story. I

equated coming from a culture that

doesn’t
prioritize
understanding

mental health to my parents simply not

caring about mine. I would get so angry

at them for not sympathizing with

a struggle I never made the effort to

explain to them. I resented them, a little

bit, for being a barrier in my attempts to

get better. I told myself I was alone in

this, I had always been alone, and there

was no point in asking for help.

Ironically, amidst all this social

distancing, I no longer had the choice

to isolate myself. Being quarantined

with my family day in, day out means

that all of my emotions are on full

display for them to see again. Despite

my best efforts to hide how hard this

whole pandemic was for me, my mom

walked in on me one night mid-panic

attack. My hands were shaking, my

mouth gaping, gasping for breath, I was

suddenly a child again. Except, I wasn’t

alone this time. My mom immediately

put her hands on my back and told me

to breathe. I could feel the hesitant

judgement and confusion attached, but

she stayed with me for however long it

took me to calm down. That willingness

to meet me where I am meant the world

to me.

A universal gap in knowledge for

most first-generation immigrants is

understanding that just because their

parent’s love and support doesn’t show

up how they want it to, it doesn’t mean

it isn’t there. We speak our love (among

other things) in different languages.

Our parents only know what it is to

try to survive in this country and they

want the same thing for us. They didn’t

have the luxury of self-actualization.

There was always a bigger problem.

Emotional needs were always a barrier

to be buried. It doesn’t mean they don’t

care. When I decided to look for it, love

was there. Even if my mother couldn’t

fully grasp what I was going through,

she still sat there and breathed with

me. And what a great miracle it is now

to share a breath. That’s all that really

matters, all that I can expect.

The new FX series titled “Dave”

is a semi-autobiography of David

Burd, played by himself, who goes

by Lil Dicky on stage. Yes, it is a

corny dick joke and yes, I kinda

love it. Moving on.

We follow Lil Dicky’s journey as

he’s trying to make it in the music

industry and become the greatest

rapper
alive.
Along
with
his

friends Mike (Andrew Santino),

Elz (Travis ‘Taco’ Bennett), and

GaTa (played by GaTa himself),

they experience the ups and

downs of what it means to be a

new artist on the scene with a lot

to prove. While the show only has

six episodes released on Hulu so

far, I’m a fan already. It’s goofy,

adorable, cringy, relatable and

really fucking funny.

I value seeing heartwarming

relationships on-screen so I was

thrilled to see such endearing

friendships
develop
quickly

throughout the first six episodes.

One character, in particular,

seems to be a fan favorite already.

GaTa is Lil Dicky’s hypeman, the

person on stage with a rapper to get

the crowd excited, and succeeds in

bringing a pure and lighthearted

aspect to the group’s dynamic.

In the show, he’s a new member

of the friend group after meeting

Dave outside of YG’s studio in the

first episode. So far, GaTa’s already

stealing scenes and showing off

his chops in his first acting role.

He’s the kind of character that

does something so unexpected and

unfiltered that you just have to

laugh in disbelief. I would compare

his character to Darius played by

LaKeith Stanfield in another FX

show called “Atlanta”.

In the fifth episode titled, “Hype

Man” the audience sees a more

serious side to the show. After

a failed rehearsal where GaTa

becomes overwhelmingly ‘hype,’

he later reveals he has bipolar

disorder. We see a heartbreaking

flashback of his manic episodes

and his diagnosis. The reaction to

GaTa’s disorder is validating and

what I think most people would

hope to receive after opening up to

their new friends.

This episode was a very pleasant

surprise. I believe the portrayal of

people with mental illnesses has

become increasingly positive in the

media over the years, and “Dave”

did a valiant effort of showing that

mental illness is not an anomaly.

GaTa tells us that the people who

you may least expect — hypemen

whose entire job is to uplift the

energy in the room— might be

suffering in silence in the hopes of

making everyone else feel better.

After the episode aired, GaTa

posted a video on Instagram

thanking viewers for their kind

reviews of his acting, however not

all of it was just a role. He shared

that events such as his manic fit at a

shoe store with his mom to getting

kicked off tour buses after making

other artists uncomfortable, were

almost completely accurate, along

with the fact that he does have

bipolar disorder in real life.

He shares, “I’m just here to

inspire yall… I just want mental

health awareness. I want people

to take it very seriously, especially

while
we’re
going
through

this,” (referring to the current

quarantine measures most people

are taking).

While “Dave” has been comedic

relief for me during these trying

times, seeing GaTa’s story has been

extremely influential to me and

viewers like me who also suffer

from mental health difficulties.

If you need a break from the

craziness of self-isolation, take a

break from reading the news, give

“Dave” a try, and most importantly

take care of yourself.

The Michigan Daily — michigandaily.com
Michigan in Color
Monday, April 13, 2020 — 3

MICHAELA MINNIS

MiC Columnist

CAMILLE MOORE

MiC “Off the Record” Blogger
Mental health awareness in FX’s ‘Dave’

JINAN ABUFARHA

MiC Columnist

FX NETWORKS

حساسة

Learning to breathe

What Does ‘Staying Home’ Look Like during COVID-19?