T
here’s nothing like waking up
to a blue sky and shining sun.
Rolling out of bed doesn’t
seem quite so hard when you know that
waiting for you is the warm embrace of
sunshine on your face and the sweet
taste of finally-seasonally-appropriate
iced coffee. You get dressed, put on a
light coat and step outside to meet the
beautiful day.
But wait — instead of the warm
sun, you are abruptly confronted by
an icy wind that stings your skin. It’s
almost April. Where is the 60-degree
weather? Why is it still freezing out?
Spring can be beautiful and exciting,
but in Michigan, spring is a temptress
who leaves you cold and disappointed.
What in the heck am I supposed to
wear?
Deciding what to wear in the spring
is a constant battle. Is it still sweater
weather? Can I wear short sleeves?
Often, I will get dressed in a giant
sweater and scarf and walk out in my
parka only to find that by midday I am
sweltering under all of my layers.
Or conversely, I head to class midday
in a light jacket and T-shirt only to
be freezing to death on my late-night
walk home from the library. The only
way to accommodate for the weather is
to pull a “Clueless”-style outfit change
every few hours.
While
it
is
difficult
to
dress
appropriately for the weather, there is a
clear portion of the student population
who do it completely wrong. Perhaps
University of Michigan students have
just evolved to be immune to the cold
in ways I have not, but somehow as
soon as it is above 50 degrees, half the
campus is on the Diag in shorts and
T-shirts, throwing a Frisbee or sitting
in a hammock.
I don’t know what’s more blinding:
The reflection of the sun off the
remaining snow patches or off the calf
of a pale white boy in shorts? Do you
not get cold? It’s really not that warm
out. This truly seems like Stockholm
syndrome but for Michigan weather.
That one dude who insists that it’s
still going to snow again
Why are you like this? Who hurt you?
Can’t you let people be happy? Spring
is a time for optimism and sunshine.
Perhaps you are trying to protect me
from the devious nature of Michigan
spring, but please do not remind me
the one day when I am finally enjoying
the weather.
Constantly predicting that it will
snow again is like reminding students
that finals are just around the corner
during that one week where there
aren’t any midterms. It’s the calm
before the storm, and you’re right that
the storm is coming, but darn it, let a
girl relax at least long enough to finish
an iced coffee.
I’m stressed out of my mind and
can never enjoy the weather when it
is good
Speaking
of
exams
and
stress,
Michigan spring — the cruel being that
it is — always seems to know when
students are busiest and then picks
those days to be warm. Do you have
an exam tomorrow? What a perfect
time to make it sunny and 65 degrees
so you can watch all the other students
enjoying themselves from the confines
of the UGLi!
Aside
from
offering
beautiful
weather when we cannot enjoy it,
spring also has other ways to make
us feel bad about ourselves. In this
atmosphere where everyone seems
happy and excited about their summers
comes a stream of Facebook posts
announcing summer internships and
fellowship offers which, even if you
have a job lined up, can make you feel
inadequate.
Oh great, Josh, the random dude
from that club I joined freshman year,
is working for McKinsey this summer
and Jessica from high school is at
Google. Meanwhile, I’m stuck here
just hoping that someone in D.C. will
be kind enough to actually pay me for
my services.
Spring has so much potential for
beauty and new opportunities. We
look forward to it every year when
we trudge our way through the snow.
Although Michigan winters are so
dreadful even the most expensive
Canada Goose jacket can’t keep you
warm, the only people who really enjoy
spring are the ones lying to themselves
about what tank-top weather is.
2B
Managing Statement Editor:
Brian Kuang
Deputy Editors:
Colin Beresford
Jennifer Meer
Rebecca Tarnopol
Photo Editor:
Amelia Cacchione
Editor in Chief:
Alexa St. John
Managing Editor:
Dayton Hare
Copy Editors:
Elise Laarman
Finntan Storer
Wednesday, March 28, 2018// The Statement
Let’s Bitch About It: Spring, you wily
temptress
statement
THE MICHIGAN DAILY | MARCH 28, 2018
BY LYDIA MURRAY, COLUMNIST
ILLUSTRATION BY BETSY STUBBS