Wednesday, January 10, 2018 // The Statement
6B
Let’s Talk About It:
Writing through my obsessions
I
was recently tapping away
at my keyboard keys writing
an article I was not feeling
passionate about. This was
deeper than a few bad weeks of writing.
I recently felt the same way about
my poetry, but learned to build my
confidence in writing poems through a
workshop class last fall semester.
Every week I would write — even
on days I did not feel I could keep
writing — and when I did, I discovered
something new about the way I think.
On the first day of my poetry workshop,
I walked in and told my professor I
was worried about becoming known
as the “Muslim poet” in class because
I write frequently about religion.
What she replied with stuck with me.
She explained that it is your obsession
that chooses you, and you must write
through your obsessions even if it
feels like you are writing the same
poem twice. From then on, I saw the
poems we read in a much different
light,
watching
my
peers
write
through their obsessions while I tried
to write through mine.
I find myself often falling into the
trap of focusing on being productive
to perfection, forgetting that some of
the greatest thinkers in history began
by working on improving themselves
before sharing their ideas with the
world. And so, as I wrote through
my poems, they revealed to me why
I had started writing and why I had
stopped. I started writing poetry as
a means of telling stories to counter
common stereotypical narratives that
frustrated me. I wrote as soon as I saw
a news headline I did not agree with
or when I wanted to put the ideas
behind my own choices into words
that would resonate with other people.
This connection was invigorating for
me and gave me a confidence I never
had before.
I stopped writing poetry when I
started feeling like I was repeating
myself, but I learned to stop fearing
how my words would be perceived
before they even reached the page. I
started to treat writing as a process of
discovery instead of right or wrong.
And yet, so often when people
do an act that is a process instead
of
something
polished,
we
stop
ourselves from doing the very things
that keep us going. We put pressure
on ourselves to be perfect, to create
an image to uphold over social media
or for our friends, or even people
we have never met. We do not allow
ourselves to fail and focus on the end
result of everything that we do. We
focus on becoming a “brand” instead
of just a person trying to figure out
what they want to do in this life that’s
ever-changing.
I realized the problems I was
having in my writing were the same
ones I was having elsewhere in
my life. Instead of focusing on the
present, on what I wanted to write
in this moment, I started to focus on
myself as a writer 10 or 50 steps from
now. To be mindful and present is an
accomplishment in and of itself, and
one that is too often overlooked.
BY RABAB JAFRI, COLUMNIST
ILLUSTRATION BY RABAB JAFRI
And so, as I wrote through my
poems, they revealed to me why
I had started writing and why I
had stopped.