The Michigan Daily — michigandaily.com
Wednesday, October 4, 2017 — 5
Arts

DOMINO

2 Fridays ago, Protomartyr released their latest record on a boat in Detroit
Punks on a boat: Proto-
Martyr’s release party 

Revelry and community mark a night of good tunes and 
good drinks as Protomartyr released their latest last Friday

On a Friday night, practically 

every generation of Detroit 
punk fans were united in a sea 
of black and gray jeans, waiting 
by the dock to board the Detroit 
Princess 
Riverboat. 
There 

was a slight disconnect, given 
the more preparatory-school-
like connotation of a riverboat 
cruise. 
That 
dissonance 

evaporated when we boarded 
and the first of seven bars 
offered us a Pabst Blue Ribbon. 
It felt very right.

Protomartyr, 
Detroit’s 

preeminent punk band today, 
chose this venue to celebrate 
their fourth album, Relatives 
of Descent, a week early. The 
album was officially released on 

Friday, September 29, to much 
acclaim. They brought along 
with them five other acts in 
what was an evening long party 
for the local scene.

We caught the tail end of 

Detroit 
producer 
Matthew 

Dear’s set, a University alum 
and near legend of the techno 
world. He is currently teaching 
a music production class at 
the University. His was a loud, 
strange, noise-filled sound that 
felt hardly contained within the 

low-ceilinged room.

That was around 7:00 p.m., and 

the crowd dissipated and filtered 
through the multiple floors of 
the boat afterwards. Each floor 
was, naturally, complete with a 
bar. On the quieter third floor, 
where the merchandise was 
located, seats and tables were 
arranged in front of a screen 
showing 
“Waterworld” 
with 

Kevin Costner. Tables were 
also selling physicals of the 
new Protomartyr album. The 
cover features a stark image of a 
woman in a white head cloth in 
front of a pink background. 

We moved to the deck for some 

fresh, cigarette-filled air, and a 
DJ alternated between upbeat 
sounds and Beach House’s Teen 
Dream, which felt fitting looking 
down the river that separates 
Detroit and Canada. There was 
a calm on this level that felt odd 
for a punk show, but enjoyable 
nonetheless. Some even brought 
their 
Moleskines 
for 
some 

quality time to think.

The boat set sail shortly 

after, and Tyevk and ADULT. 
both played strong, energetic 
sets during the sail. The stage 
room didn’t truly fill until we 
docked again for the final two 
bands, and then Preoccupations 
(formerly known as Viet Cong) 
played to an enthralled crowd. 
Their 
set, 
which 
opened 

with their hit “Anxiety,” was 
characterized by improvisation 
and pure, unbridled emotion. At 
the tail end they spent over ten 
minutes slamming out the same 
final chord, each time seeming 
like the last. It was a game with 
the audience and it worked — the 
room vibrated still after. 

The climax of the evening 

was clearly Protomartyr. Part 
of their cult fandom comes from 
the sheer energy of their live 
shows. Joe Casey will, without 
fail, quite literally sweat on you 
if you’re close enough. You can 
usually see it drip down his 
forehead by track four, and he 
certainly went headfirst into 
this performance. The luckiest 
among us were spat on. They 
played through their new album 
from front to back, and added a 
few crowd pleasers in between, 
like “Cowards Starve,” dripping 
out the words “I’m going out 
in… style!” with disdain and 
immediacy. It was entrancing, 

it was angry and it was head 
banging. The mosh pit opened 
quickly and sustained a good 
tempo through the show, and it 
never became antagonistic — the 
crowd was in sync with itself, and 
with the band. When someone 
dropped their purse, everyone 
stopped and let her pick it up. 
And the boat remained afloat 
among the communal noise.

— MATT GALLATIN

On 
a 
warmer-than-usual 

mid-September Friday, three 
friends and I drove to the 
Michigan-Canada border for 
a miniature cruise aboard the 
Detroit Princess, a riverboat 
whose existence, I must confess, 
I wasn’t even aware of until 
Detroit 
punks 
Protomartyr 

booked it for their record 
release show. After parking 
on the Cobo Center roof, we 
made our way down to the 
channel to wait with hundreds 
of others in line. The crowd 
was about what you would 
expect, an interesting mix of 
yuppie, grimy and old-timey, 
but nothing if not brimming 
with excitement. Meanwhile, 
Graeme Flegenheimer — owner 
of Detroit’s El Club, who helped 
curate the event — anxiously 
paced up and down the line, 
reminding people to have their 
IDs ready and that the boat was 
shoving off promptly at 7:15 
p.m.

Though billed as a show, the 

event was more like a festival. 
Sets started at 6:30 with special 
guest 
Matthew 
Dear 
and 

featured more-or-less local acts 
— Detroit rockers Tyvek and 
ADULT. as well as Protomartyr 
alongside 
Calgary-based 

post-punks 
Preoccupations 

and Toronto noise rock band 
METZ, whose new album also 
happened to be released the day 
of the event.

The shows were all held 

on the first floor of the boat, 
but plenty of entertainment 
could be found in just about 
every corner of the five-story 
ship. Movie screenings took 
place throughout the night 
on the second floor, with food 
and band merchandise on the 
third floor and myriad bars 
throughout the entire venue.

It 
wasn’t 
until 
we 
had 

reached the fourth and fifth 

floors, though, that I decided 
I would one day be doing 
everything in my power to have 
my wedding — let’s hope I can 
manage to get married one 
day, anyway — on the Detroit 
Princess. 
It’s 
difficult 
to 

describe precisely the feeling I 
felt when we first stepped out 
onto the fourth-floor deck. 
The temperature, oppressively 
hot and humid earlier, was a 
perfect 70 degrees, tempered 
by the river’s coolness. Four 
stories up was also just high 
enough to see at least a portion 
of Detroit’s (and Windsor’s) 
sprawl under the setting sun, 
itself a beautiful menagerie 
of oranges, yellows, purples 
and soft blue-grays. When the 
Princess started moving, it was 
hard not to feel like one of the 
luckiest people alive, and for 
only $20! (This still blows my 
mind.)

As 
the 
night 
progressed 

and the boat ran out of food — 
arguably the only hitch in the 
entire evening — a rotating set 
of DJs spun smoother, poppier 
tunes on the deck while the 
punks set fire to the first 
floor. (Not literally, of course; 
Pitchfork actually published 
a piece titled “Detroit Punks 
Charter a Riverboat. Somehow 
Nothing Gets Trashed.”) When 
Protomartyr finally took the 
stage, the crowd was no less 
energetic than it had been two 
or three hours earlier, and the 
band brought the heat to match 
— frontman Joe Casey actually 
kept a full-size bath towel 
on his mic stand, citing his 
imminent sweatiness.

The band’s set was composed 

of new material from Relatives 
in Descent — the album wasn’t 
officially released until the 
week following the show — as 
well as songs from all three of 
their previous albums. Though 
the audience’s unfamiliarity with 
the new songs threatened to kill 
momentum at times, favorites 
from Agent Intellect and Under 
Color of Official Right ensured 
success through and through. 
At the end of the night, I had 
only two remaining coherent 
thoughts: first, I cannot wait to 
have this album and second, how 
the hell does anyone still have the 
energy to go to the aftershow?

— SEAN LANG

MATT GALLATIN

Daily Music Editor

SEAN LANG
Daily Arts Editor

RELEASE REVIEW

ABC

‘Modern Family’ is actually still on TV
‘Modern’ remains same 
and reaches redundancy

The show keeps its typical tone, forsaes originality in its 9th season

A model of consistency.
As it enters its ninth season, 

that’s what “Modern Family” 
has become. Each episode, each 
season, is replete with quality one-
liners and self-deprecating jokes. 
Since 2010, the show has been 
nominated for — or won — the 
Primetime Emmy for Outstanding 
Comedy Series every year. That’s 
the 
sterling 
reputation 
that 

“Modern Family” has earned for 
itself, and, if the season premiere 
is any indication, the series has no 
intention of changing its formula. 
Returning to its tried-and-true 
brand of zany, yet genuine humor, 
“Modern Family”’s ninth season 
offers loyal audiences exactly what 
they have come to expect, albeit at 
the expense of originality.

Right off the bat, “Modern 

Family”’s 
premiere 
establishes 

the series’ trademark tone, with 
Manny (Rico Rodriguez, “The 
Muppets”) re-inventing himself 
yet again to avoid embarrassment. 
Only this time, he’s adopted the 
name “Manuel” as he prepares 
to ship off to college. Manny’s 
inability to fit in has long been 
a running gag on 
the show, and this 
episode does a solid 
job of extending the 
joke.

Elsewhere, 

“Modern 
Family” 

introduces 
us 
to 

Alex’s (Ariel Winter, 
“Killers”) 
new 

boyfriend, Ben (Joe 
Mande, “Parks and Recreation”). 
Ben is saddled with the unenviable 
task of trying to make the Dunphys 
and Pritchetts like him, despite 
the fact that they all want nothing 
to do with him and his crop-top 
pajamas. Throughout the episode, 
Mande excels at being just the 

right amount of annoying and self-
aware, as he agrees with Claire’s 
(Julie Bowen, “Happy Gilmore”) 
rant about how he is “a huge 
reason why I need a vacation.”

Although Mande absorbs most 

of the episode’s verbal jabs, Cam 
(Eric Stonestreet, “The Secret 

Life 
of 
Pets”) 

still 
shines 
in 

his reduced role 
as the episode’s 
punching 
bag. 

Stonestreet 
spends most of 
the episode being 
ripped apart by 
Mitchell 
(Jesse 

Tyler 
Ferguson, 

“Ice Age: Collision Course”) and 
Gloria (Sofía Vergara, “Chef”) 
for donning a frighteningly ugly 
white robe and obnoxious amount 
of sunscreen to avoid sunburn, all 
while insisting to Mitchell, “We 
have great taste.”

Cam continues to be the ideal 

CONNOR GRADY

Daily Arts Writer

foil 
for 
everyone’s 
favorite 

curmudgeon, Jay (Ed O’Neill, 
“Married with Children”). Cam’s 
unabashedly optimistic persona 
meshes perfectly with Jay’s 
constant cynicism, producing 
some of the episode’s finest 
moments. As Jay wallows in 
his sorrowful realization that 
he is an unmemorable grandpa, 
Stonestreet reminds him of the 
time he so graciously “went to 
Costco and got me that giant 
thing of almond milk,” with 
O’Neill justifying his kindness: 
“Well you like it and it doesn’t 
go bad!” The entire scene is a 
gorgeous example of the type 
of funny, yet heartfelt comedy 
that has come to define “Modern 
Family.”

Strangely absent from this 

whole comedic picture is usual 
“Modern Family” stalwart Phil 
(Ty Burrell, “The Incredible 
Hulk”), who barely receives 
any screen time in the episode 
outside of a few hilarious scenes 
with Claire. It’s an odd decision 
for the show given that Burrell 
can carry “Modern Family” with 
his perpetually neurotic style 
and that Burrell shines in his 
brief moments in the episode. 
Since Burrell is seen as one of 
the faces of the series, it seems 
reasonable to expect his role 
return to its normal size for the 
remainder of the season.

Even 
without 
Burrell’s 

typical 
zaniness 
dominating 

the episode, the episode reeks 
of the battle-tested “Modern 
Family” formula. Chiefly, this 
recipe entails a healthy dose of 
self-deprecating 
humor 
from 

Cam, laughable paranoia from 
Gloria, blissful ignorance from 
Manny and a biting sardonic 
wit from Jay. This formula has 
allowed the show to reach the 
apex of small-screen comedy, 
it also drags the series down 
in places because using it lacks 
any semblance of creativity or 
innovation in it. While “Modern 
Family”’s characters maintain 
some of television’s strongest and 
most enjoyable chemistry, the 
show’s own consistency could 
be its downfall if it continues its 
dogged dependence on formula.

“Modern Family”

Season 9 
premiere

ABC

Wednesdays at 

9 PM

TV REVIEW
DAILY FILM COLUMN

What to watch 
this October

Film Columnist Madeleine Gaudin 
tells you all about essential horror

Every 
season 
is 
horror 

season when you’re living in a 
wasteland of violence and late-
stage capitalism, but if I had 
to pick one month that most 
embodies the genre it would, 
of course, be October. Horror’s 
tricky — when it’s good, it’s 
good. But it can be difficult 
to begin when everything’s 
a remake of a remake or part 
of the “Saw” franchise. And 
that’s such a shame, because 
horror has so much capacity 
for beauty, humor 
and 
compelling 

narrative. 
If 
you 

want to be scared 
and unsettled and 
blown away, here’s 
what I recommend 
for 
the 
most 

wonderful time of 
the year.

***

The Witch
Last 
year’s 

standout 
horror 

landed itself a number 10 spot 
on Daily Art’s coveted Best of 
2016 list, and was even higher 
on my personal list. When a 
Puritan family living on the 
outskirts of a New England 
settlement begins to implode—
dead crops, missing babies—
their eldest daughter (played 
by the incredible Anya Taylor-
Joy “Split”) seems to be at the 
center. 

Robert Egger’s directorial 

debut 
is 
stunning 
and 

horrifying. Egger — who’s set 
to direct the remake of 1922 
silent classic “Nosferatu” next 
— is a production designer by 
trade, so “The Witch” has the 
kind of meticulous beauty and 

composition that usually fall by 
the wayside in horror.

Maybe I’m biased. Witches 

are the most appealing part of 
horror culture for me. I’m here 
for cauldrons and spells and 
black cats. I’m especially here 
for covens and sisterhoods and 
the part when a girl gets really 
mad and the weather gets bad. 
But “The Witch” brings the 
subgenre back to its historical 
origins and contextualizes the 
plight of a woman whose power 

transcends 
the 

limitations of Puritan 
life.

It’s 
a 
beautiful 

meditation 
on 

girlhood, family and 
dark magic. It also 
happens to have the 
single greatest jump 
scare 
of 
all 
time 

(that’s a fact). If you 
only have time — or 
the stomach — for 
one horror movie this 

month, make it “The Witch.”

“The Witch” is available to 

stream on Amazon Prime.

Texas Chainsaw Massacre
If you didn’t go back and 

watch (or hopefully rewatch) 
Tobe Hooper’s classic slasher 
film when he died in August, 
now’s your chance. This is 
probably the closest this list is 
going to get to canon or classic 
horror.

This movie is beautiful — 

absolutely stunning. It’s also 
incredibly campy, the kind of 
low budget horror that amuses 
as much as it scares. 

MADELEINE 

GAUDIN

SEE FILM
On Page 5

