3B
Wednesday, September 21, 2016 / The Statement 

S

ometimes I call myself a “sonic 
youth.” It’s become a bit of a pet 
name this first month of school — a 

pep name, if you will — that reminds me 
I am still a crisp young gun, traipsing the 
sunny streets of Ann Arbor with as much 
musicality as possible. But also, I’ve been 
into Sonic Youth lately.

Teenage Riot – Sonic Youth

“Yeah, you’re it,” Kim Gordon begins 

the song whispering, in that weird I’m-
Kermit-the-Frog-but-also-your-fantasy 
tone of voice — hers, and only hers. And 
somehow, I can’t help but believe her; I 
could be walking down the street, feel-
ing the farthest thing from “it,” yet she 
always reassures me that I am. A sonic 
youth, full of vitae and a healthy bal-
ance of useful and useless knowledge, I 
am. Gordon doesn’t know any of this, of 
course, but if she did I’d like to think she’d 
approve and start a teenage riot with me. 
 

Bulls on Parade – Rage Against The 

Machine

At my core, in the teeny tiny crevice of 

my heart noir, I’ve always been in love 
with rock music. Ever since I learned to 
listen, I’ve had this insatiable craving for 
it, two ears that perk up like an eager Ger-
man Shepard’s at the slightest strum of a 
Fender. Many humans, like Gordon, don’t 
know this about me — I have a generally 
perky demeanor, so when I glow up at the 
mention of Rage Against the Machine in 
public, forced smiles of latent confusion 

tend to manifest.

What Ever Happened? – The Strokes

But I listen on, as I always have. In 

psychology, there’s this thing called a 
flashbulb memory: a moment from the 
storage bin of your life you remember 
in sharp detail — the smells, the sounds, 
what you did, what you said. The only 
flashbulb memory I can summon involves 
tiny Melina nuzzled on her black leather 
living room couch circa 2006, watching 
“Marie Antoinette” for the first time and 
hearing The Strokes’ “What Ever Hap-
pened?” play during a pivotal scene. I felt 
instantly more alive when Julian Casa-
blancas wailed, when the guitar pounced 
forward. “This is everything my ears 
have been looking for” is the feeling I had. 
“This is what I like.”

Some Girls – The Rolling Stones

I still feel like this when I listen to 

any kind of rock. Almost love-struck, 
I feel in-tune to my surroundings and 
myself simultaneously. All of my senses 
are heightened by that harmony, and my 
mental state is mollified — where some 
girls need a kiss, I need Mick Jagger tell-
ing me I’m under his thumb. Alas, at the 
risk of veering into un-punk, Parmesan 
cheese territory: I feel ready to take on 
the world when I’m plugged in, no matter 
the circumstance.

And invincibility is a hell of a drug. 

Lately — with new classes, work, 5,000 
readings, the nagging thought of the 

future and the puzzles of the past nipping 
at my heels — I have needed a dose of it. 
Rock injects me. It reminds me that I can 
do it. I don’t need yoga (well, maybe) and 
I don’t need to whine about it. Instead, I 
can listen to the great musical trailblazers 
of yesteryear whine about it and squash 
my own silly fears along the way. That’s 
what a sonic youth would do.

So, lately, when I step out of my apart-

ment building every morning, I’ve got the 
Misfits crawling into my eardrums. The 
fresh air is always a little jarring, and the 
door is always a little harder to push open 
than anticipated, but I’ll be OK. Hell, I’ll 
thrive.

Because “I ain’t no goddamn son of a 

bitch. You better think about it, baby.”

Life is a Mixtape: Some Girls Like Rock

B Y M E L I N A G L U S A C

“I would not be unhappy if I were the last 
cisgender male to play a female transgender on 
television.”

— JEFFREY TAMBOR, who won the Emmy for Lead Actor in a Comedy Series 
for “Transparent.”

on the record: emmy awards 2016

“Asian parents out there, if you could just do me 
a favor: if just a couple of you can get your kids 
cameras instead of violins, we’ll be all good.”

—ALAN YANG, who won the Emmy for Writing for a Comedy Series for the 
“Parents” episode of “Master of None.”

“I, along with the rest of the world, had been 
superficial in my judgment, and I’m glad that I’m 
able to stand here and say, ‘I’m sorry.’”

—SARAH PAULSON, who won the Emmy for Lead Actress in a Limited Series 
for portraying Marcia Clark on “The People vs. O.J. Simpson.”

ILLUSTRATIONS BY EMILIE FARRUGIA

COVER DESIGN BY SHANE ACHENBACH

“I feel so lucky to be on a show that puts women in 
the center.”

—TATIANA MASLANY, who won the Emmy for Lead Actress in a Drama Series 
for “Orphan Black.”

“I haven’t alaways been a great man, but I make an 
amazing woman.”

—Louie Anderson, who won the Emmy for Best Supporting Actor in a 
Comedy Series for his portrayal of a mother in “Baskets.”

“I would like to dedicate this to my father, who 
passed away on Friday. And I’m so glad that he 
liked “Veep,” because his opinion was the one that 
really mattered.”

— Julia Louis-Dreyfus, who won the Emmy for Best Actress in a Comedy 
Series for “Veep.”

