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ACROSS
1 “I don’t like it!”
4 Waikiki allure
8 Like an old
jalopy
14 Chemical suffix
15 Hesse-based
automaker
16 Reporter’s coup
17 Man-mouse link
18 Angry young
man’s fate?
20 Hill stint
22 Hershey bar
23 Bygone political
entity that
included Syr.
24 Hercules, e.g.?
28 South African
golfer with four
major
championships
29 Be quite
prevalent
30 Polite response
to Aunt Polly
32 Seasonal
affliction
33 Ingolstadt-based
automaker
35 Crude carrier
39 Result of a
Caribbean
sanitation strike?
44 Poet Sexton
45 Popular melt
meat
46 Einstein’s birth
city
47 50-50, to Fifi
51 __ Council:
“Survivor”
feature
53 Rush
56 Proprietary
paperwork?
59 “Well done!”
analog
60 Pacific feast
61 Drudge
62 Ready-to-hang
Cubist painting?
67 Indian state that
was part of a
former
Portuguese
colony
68 Tamsui River
capital
69 Excited about,
with “on”
70 “Monsters, __”
71 Magellan’s
milieux
72 Breyers
competitor
73 Require

DOWN
1 Regional
organisms
2 Stimulant
trademark
3 Jalapeño product,
for some?
4 San José sun
5 News org.
6 Court charge
caller
7 Soft tissue
8 In front of
9 Many sports
commentators
10 Bee: Pref.
11 Chapeau seen in
“Ratatouille”
12 Quotidian
13 Jury members
19 “__-doke!”
21 Apennines
possessive
25 Ship loading site
26 Word on a bill
27 Old writings
mentioning Odin
31 Open __
32 Org. requiring milk
pasteurization
34 The Bronx’s
Jerome Ave. line
is part of it
36 Mixture that
dissolves gold
37 Rare twosome of
July 2015

38 Pro __
40 Pro’s support
41 1984 Nobel
Peace Prize
winner
42 Regarding
43 Innocent
48 Big name in
mustard
49 Wolf-headed
god
50 One covering
tracks, perhaps
52 Hit on the head

53 Book with steps
54 __ crest: pelvic
border
55 Like H.P.
Lovecraft stories
57 Tremble
58 Oreos, say
63 Org. monitoring
endangered
species
64 Letters of proof
65 Turn that’s hung
66 Chekov’s “Star
Trek” rank: Abbr.

By Jeffrey Wechsler
©2015 Tribune Content Agency, LLC
10/02/15

10/02/15

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE:

RELEASE DATE– Friday, October 2, 2015

Los Angeles Times Daily Crossword Puzzle

Edited by Rich Norris and Joyce Nichols Lewis

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Y

ou might think that this 
column will be about 
What a Time To Be 

Alive, because FutureDrake/
LoveSounds is the collab of the 
century and 
that’s what I 
would write 
about if I 
took my job 
seriously. 
This column 
is not about 
What a Time 
to Be Alive, 
however, 
and that’s 
because it’s 
definitely a time to be alive, 
but so was last time and next 
time will probably be, too. I’m 
also not sure what strange 
astrological nonsense had to 
happen for me to get this job, 
so I’m still working out how 
to take it seriously. Right now 
that means drinking vending 
machine coffee and putting pic-
tures of bathroom graffiti on 
my Snapchat story at 4 a.m., but 
all things are possible through 
the Based God, who, as we all 
know, works in mysterious 
ways (#TYBG).

In any case, we are in fact 

alive and, as Riff Raff once 
said, “time (time) goes by (goes 
by), it goes on (it goes on), 
and it don’t stop (don’t stop).” 
Winter 
changes 
to 
spring, 

spring changes to summer, 
and summer changes to Slime 
Season, 
the 
latest 
mixtape 

from 
Atlanta 
rapper/weirdo 

Young Thug, wherein we finally 
discover what Thugger orders 
at Chipotle. It’s the gotdamn 
salad, naturally.

Slime Season isn’t all that 

interesting other than the salad 
thing, but you’ll recall from my 
last column that I’m somewhat 
preoccupied 
with 
salads 
— 

albeit of the Dadaist word and 
Caesar word varieties — so I 
suspect that Young Thug and I 
might actually be speaking the 
same blanguage. That’s a good 
thing, I think, because I’ve been 
hung up on what the fuck he’s 

talking about in his song “I Got 
(feat. Peewee Longway)” since 
last September, and I really 
miss being able to sleep at night.

I’ll give you the lyrics to 

Thugger’s hook, just so we can 
all be on the same page:

“I got, bitches in the dirt like 

a fucking termite / And this 
bitch must think I’m green, but 
ho, I’m red like a car light / And 
him against me, babe I’ma win 
like a pipe / Now give me eight 
million, I come to the rescue! / 
Yeah, I’ma protect your heart 
just like a vest do / Yeah, I’m a 
prince I don’t wake up like the 
rest do / I’ma ride on your ho 
like she a Mongoose.”

There are a few places we 

could start, but I think the best 
might be to get the obvious 
out of the way — this shit is 
bananas. 
Completely 
batshit 

brazy (or crazy, for those of 
my readers who aren’t well-
versed in blood talk). The rest 
of the track is equally insane, 
with 
Young 
Thug 
rapping 

about 
a 
potentially 
racist, 

mildly incestuous sex scene 
and forgetting the difference 
between his head and his penis 
before Peewee Longway shows 
up to spit a 24 bar paraphrase of 
everything else that happens in 
the song.

And yet, somehow all of that 

surrealist 
nonsense 
doesn’t 

really shock the conscience — 
it’s weird, but at the end of the 
day we’re left with a pretty 
standard trap song. Thugger 
spits his 24-bar verse, mentions 
the obligatory drug deals and 
luxury goods, and makes the 
traditional preposterous sexual 
boasts. In short, he follows all 
the rules.

Except 
there’s 
one 
spot 

where 
Young 
Thug 
does 

something truly obscene, and 
here he’s offending not only the 
trap gods, but also the entire 
western metaphysical tradition.

I’m talking, of course, about 

that “I’ma win like a pipe” line.

Now, before you give up on 

me and go see what my friends 
in the sports section have to 
say about sportball, take a 
moment to consider Slovenian 
Marxist 
philosopher/human 

sinus infection Slavoj Žižek’s 
ruminations on the Kinder 
Surprise Egg in “The Pervert’s 
Guide to Ideology” (if you 
haven’t seen the film, go ask the 
nearest white man with a beard 
to give you a brief synopsis). 
The 
Kinder 
Surprise 
Egg 

works in much the same way 
as a fortune cookie — you open 
up the egg/cookie, which has 
a milk chocolate/nondescript 
cookie shell, and inside you 

find a plastic toy/fortune. In 
a traditional reading of the 
Kinder 
egg/fortune 
cookie, 

Slavoj explains, the toy/fortune 
— a hidden, secret meaning or 
richness — is the reason why 
the entire apparatus exists. You 
tear away the cookie or the milk 
chocolate shell to get at your toy/
fortune, the true object of your 
desire. The same metaphysical 
logic applies to certain ways 
of 
conceptualizing 
human 

activity, 
like 
Christianity, 

neoliberal capitalism and most 
Pitchfork reviews.

As Slavoj goes on to argue, 

however, the traditional reading 
of the Kinder Egg problem isn’t 
necessarily the right one. You 
could, for example, treat the 
plastic toy/fortune — which is 
hard to assign a fixed identity 
to, particularly when you’re 
talking about the meaning of 
life instead of a bunch of lucky 
numbers — as the condition 
necessary to appreciate its 
chocolaty exoskeleton as the 
true object of our desire. This 
anti-metaphysical assertion is 
“hard to grasp,” as Slavoj puts 
it, and it’s somewhat unclear 
what’s at stake in thinking 
about life as an endless search 
for chocolaty exoskeletons. I 
don’t know about you, but it 
sounds kind of fetishistic.

Which brings us back to our 

friend Young Thug. What is Thug-
ger really saying when he raps 
“Bitch, I’mma win like a pipe”?

The answer, of course, is very 

simple: he’s gonna win. And 
yet that simple answer doesn’t 
quite explain what he said. He’s 
gonna win like a pipe. That “like 
a pipe” — a sort of dysfunctional 
simile that doesn’t actually 
explain how he’s going to win, 
but just makes a play on the 
word “windpipe,” which, of 
course, only works because 
Young Thug’s voice sounds like 
an autotuned crow — is the 
essence of Young Thugness.

Thugger is (and we are) pure 

finesse: the gloriously absurd 
excess that justifies spending 
our lives rooting around, not 
unlike the pigs and termites 
populating his lyrics, in the 
quotidian muck of existence. 
The true meaning of life, as 
Žižek and Young Thug show 
us, is to learn to love neither 
the salad nor the dressing, but 
to love the act of pouring on 
the sauce … which might also 
explain why that dude is always 
rapping about ejaculating. 

DePollo is watching sportball. 

To find out about the philosophical 

underpinnings of the game, 

email adepollo@umich.edu.

HIP HOP COLUMN

Young Thug and the 
art of salad dressing

ADAM 

DEPOLLO

“Like a pipe” 
is the essence 

of Young 
Thugness.

Life as an 

endless search 
for chocolaty 
exoskeletons.

ARE YOU TOUGH 
ENOUGH TO DRIVE 
INTO A CATEGORY 

4 HURRICANE?

THEN JOIN DAILY 

SPORTS.

WE’RE DOING IT 

TODAY.

Email sportseditors@michigandaily.com for 

information on applying.

6 — Friday, October 2, 2015
Sports & Arts
The Michigan Daily — michigandaily.com

Michigan hosts Toronto in 
exhibition to open season

Preseason Big Ten 
No. 1 ranking puts 
high expectations 

on Wolverines

By MINH DOAN

Daily Sports Editor

Sunday, the Yost Ice Arena 

doors will swing open for the first 
time this season.

After a summer of NHL 

development 
camps 
and 

internships, 
the 
Michigan 

hockey 
team 
hosts 

Toronto in an 
exhibition.

“It’s 
our 

first game, so I 
know we’ll be 
excited,” 
said 

Michigan coach 
Red Berenson. 
“I hope we see 
the intensity of a real game. You 
play hockey all summer, and you 
get into summer habits. There’s 
no stopping and starting, no 
hitting, no break-out defense, 
so we want to start getting into 
some good habits.”

But a new season also brings 

high expectations.

The Big Ten coaches picked the 

Wolverines to win the conference 
in the league’s poll Monday. 
Junior forward JT Compher, 
sophomore 
defenseman 
Zach 

Werenski and freshman forward 
Kyle Connor were also named to 
the Big Ten Preseason Players to 
Watch list.

Werenski, 
one 
of 
four 

unanimous 
selections 
to 

the list, leads 
a 
defensive 

unit 
that 

returns all of 
its significant 
contributors. 
Two 
freshmen, 
Joseph Cecconi and Nicholas 
Boka, will be adding to the talent 
on the blue line. Both come in as 
highly touted recruits and 2015 
NHL Draft picks.

“They’re 
younger, 
but 

they’re doing a good job taking 
everything 
in 
stride,” 
said 

sophomore defenseman Cutler 
Martin. “As soon as the games 
start to come, they’re going to 
learn a lot really fast, and they’re 
going to be an impact on our 
team.”

Connor, the reigning United 

States Hockey League Player 
of the Year, is among the most 
highly touted of those freshmen. 
Another summer NHL draft 

pick, he brings a wealth of talent 
to a team that lost its top three 
scorers from last season in Dylan 
Larkin, Andrew Copp and Zach 
Hyman.

On the other side of the ice, 

Toronto comes into the game 
after a mediocre 16-16 season. 
Led by coach Darren Lowe, the 
Varsity Blues travel across the 

border to face 
two 
NCAA 

teams 
in 

Bowling Green 
and Michigan, 
before heading 
back to Canada 
to start their 
season.

But 
in 

an exhibition, it won’t be the 
opponent that the Wolverines 
are worried about. It will be their 
own team.

“A lot of the older guys, we 

know our systems, but executing 
those to more of a tee is going to 
be important this year because 
obviously, we’ve come one goal 
short or one game short of the 
tournament 
the 
past 
couple 

years,” Martin said. “Making 
sure everything is spot on from 
the very beginning and working 
out those kinks against Toronto is 
going to be big because two weeks 
later when we play Mercyhurst, 
it’s going to be important that we 
have everything worked out.”

JAMES COLLER/Daily

Sophomore defenseman Cutler Martin is part of an experienced defense that returns all of its significant contributors.

Toronto at 
Michigan

Matchup: 
Toronto 0-0; 
Michigan 0-0

When: Sunday 
5 P.M.

Where: Yost 
Ice Arena

TV/Radio: 
MGoBlue.com

“It’s our first 

game, so I know 
we’ll be excited.”

